The Nescient White Male Top Writer Blog

Becoming more self-aware of how ignorant I’ve been

This is just me, my thoughts, my keyboard, and whatever those dudes in the picture are doing. No real point, just me talking strategy with myself. Will probably tell a few jokes on the way. Come with me, it will be fun.

I took half of August off from writing. It was part vacation, part existential crisis.

I went way down south to see GB Rogut again.

I went camping

Spent some time in the garden

Started a new game in Stardew Valley.

And of course, went to watch live pro wrestling.

What I Learned from Not Publishing on Medium for 2 Weeks

I made less money.

That’s about it.

After 600 stories written I have a large catalogue of evergreens to fall back on. I may have missed out on a few bucks but not that much. It’s about 5% of my stories that make me 90% of my money. It was like I hadn’t had a hit story in two weeks which happens all the time.

Age of Empathy

It started when Gabby and I became a thing. GB Rogut is the nice girl I should go, for but never do. It’s the healthiest relationship I’ve ever had because the foundation for it is mutual admiration instead of one of us having drugs.

Gabby was a crapshoot who turned out to be gem. She’s everything she says she is. We’re compatible. Very attracted to each other. Similar libido (horny). Amazing tits. What a woman.

I’m not fucking this one up. Instead of thinking about how she’s different than my past girlfriends, I’m making sure that I’m different. Triaging my previous relationships to determine what I did that changed love into hate.

Wrote a great story about it nobody read. It was even distributed. Link at the bottom.

Afflicted with afluenza

I’ve been thinking about my life experiences. All the criminal acts and dick moves I’ve gotten away without any long-term consequences. I thought I skated by because I’m slick.

I’m not slick, I’m a handsome white guy who believes his own bullshit because I keep getting away with it.

There are no long-term repercussions for me. Acting is in my blood. I know what you want to hear. Charming and personable is my specialty. Cops let me go with a warning, Employers keeps hiring me, and girlfriends forgive me.

I haven’t been growing as a person, I’ve been learning new tactics that allow me to thrive while staying incompetent to the point where I just now realized how incompetent I am.

Then I started questioning my writing. Am I good or is it because I look the part?

The truth will set you free

The best thing I’ve gained from Medium is insight. Through my own writing and by reading the words of other people.

I’ve read plenty of social injustice stories on other social media platforms. It’s two sentences and a picture. I hit like, but deep down I’m thinking, “Maybe if you spent less time complaining and more time…”

On Medium you get to know the storytellers as real people. Writers paint a picture that I’m able to relate with. You get the whole story with context.

Then you see the hateful comments people leave after a minority woman talks about their reality. Who are these assholes?

I never got the negative comments other writers do,

“It’s because my voice is authoritive.”

No, you fucking aloof nescient himbo. People are scared to clap back at you. You don’t get negative feedback because you’re terrifying.

Unfortunately, it’s not that either. The truth is worse.

I’m the trolls' favorite writer.

Hogan Torah’s existential nightmare

My character was always self-aware of his privilege. What I wasn’t aware of is how different life is for the non-white, non-male, and non-hot.

My life experiences have made me a confident and positive person. I now understand why my audience is so white and male. My undeserved confidence inspires white guys just like that self-help bullshit.

I didn’t realize the difference between an attractive white man and an attractive white woman. By making fun of men and women who had more followers than me I thought I was being inclusive.

White guys consider it an honor to be satirized by me. They never get roasted. Women do not view it as an honor.

It’s hard to laugh at yourself when strangers attack you for arbitrary ignorant reasons. Then you got me pissing on your cheerios and I may make some good points.

Punching up isn’t just striking at people who are more successful than you. Being a white man from an affluent background there’s only one person I’m allowed to satirize and that’s other white guys.

My apologies to any women or minorities I’ve taken down. I thought I was being inclusive by poking fun at you. I now understand why you didn’t see it that way and for that I am sorry.

Rebranding

In my two years here, I’ve matured as a writer and a person. I’ve reached stage three of my long-term plan. Originally, I planned on shedding Hogan Torah to become my final form. Drop all the silly and become a serious writer.

I didn’t realize how much fun being Hogan Torah would be and how beloved he’d become. Hogan Torah stays but it’s time to update my look and attitude.

Red and black is out. I’m going white and gold. New beard, new haircut. Less insane but zanier. Drop the short gimmick. As Gabby said, I’m not short at all.

I’m going to be more serious when doing journalism and more absurd when doing satire. The numbers speak loud and clear. You want me to be funny. I will be funny, but I want to show my chops. I can do serious journalism, I just don’t.

Who are those guys in your header image?

This was taken at the Rainbow after the GCW show earlier this year. Janela wanted to go to the Rainbow Room on Sunset, so we went to the Rainbow Room. I don’t normally ask for pictures with wrestlers, but the time was right and Scott asked.

From left: Jimmy Lloyd: Jimmy is young, but immature. Fortunately, as a death match wrestler that’s an asset. His nickname is Different Boy because he’s built like power transformer and indestructible.

Viewer discretion advised. Don’t worry, they know how to fall. I assure you; Jimmy is compensated very well.

Joey Janella: Is Joey Janella.

Emil Jay: My friend, my muse, the guy who got me in. The voice of GCW.

Scott Effinger: Scott and I are both recovered addicts. He’s also a writer. We’re what’s known as indy stooges. We love pro wrestling, help the wrestlers get what they need when in town. In return the wrestlers tolerate us hanging out and tell us awesome stories we can’t tell anyone.

Hogan Torah: Some asshole who thinks telling people he’s short is funny.

It’s a cool picture of cool people at a cool place.