The Most Important Life Lessons I Learned From Goodfellas
Garlic sliced razor-thin is the only way to go
Everything old is new again
On a recent Saturday morning, I trundled through the drudgery of household chores. They never end, and I was resigned to my fate. In the midst of cleaning and doing the umpteenth load of laundry, I decided to distract myself while folding tea towels. “Let’s give Netflix a whirl,” I thought to myself, grabbing the remote. Anything to make this never-ending purgatory of household responsibilities go by quickly, I scanned the movies that were available. There were at least a couple hours of folding and sorting to be done, so the film I chose had better be good.
And “good” it was.
When Goodfellas scrolled by as an option on my Netlflix playlist, I paused. I was immediately taken back to 1990 when I had first seen the flick, the one movie that really kick-started my love of true crime stories and fascination with the Mafia. Organized crime, “The Mob,” as horrible as it is, continues to be a point of interest for a large swath of us regular folks who live more pedestrian — and non-criminal — lives. Remembering how much I loved the film and reminding myself that I hadn’t seen it for a good 25 years if not more, there was no time like the present.
I hit “Play.”
Perhaps in deference to Martin Scorcese’s brilliance in bringing this story to life, rewatching Goodfellas again resulted in the feeling that no time had passed at all. Not 25 or 30 years; no, the timelessness and visceral nature of the of the film remained over three decades later.
The “Mob Life”
Perhaps before we get into the important lessons that were revealed upon viewing the film, we should discuss what this 20th century morality tale is all about.
In a nutshell, one could argue that Goodfellas is a love story — a love story in which the key characters do everything they need to do for love. And that love is strong. Unfortunately for those in the orbit of the main characters, it’s sadly evident that the strong feelings of desire and amorous intentions by Henry Hill et al are not necessarily aimed towards other human beings. Wives, “goomahs” — it doesn’t matter. No — in the brutal world of The Mob, love starts and ends with one person and one person only: the mobster. Whatever it takes to keep that love alive is done. Full stop.
In the brutal world of The Mob, love starts and ends with one person and one person only: the mobster.
Murder? Check. Mayhem? You’ve got it. Drugs? They shouldn’t but they do. After all, in the minds of intrepid gangsters, only an idiot would turn down easy money, despite what the mob rules dictate.
Films such as Goodfellas reveal the stark reality that exists in this world in which rules are simultaneously sacrosanct and made to be broken. What a paradox.
Films such as Goodfellas reveal the stark reality that exists in this world in which rules are simultaneously sacrosanct and made to be broken. What a paradox.
Yet still, the love of money, of power and of control guides the actions of the key figures in this movie and in the lives of real-life gangsters. The crystal clarity of each character’s motivation conveyed in the film is one that is at once startling and revealing. It is made clear through the actions of all mafia players that love of self and what that same self wants at any given point in time is the basis of all activities executed by mobsters, pun intended. Mob rules…until it doesn’t. It is at this point that it’s every man for himself, literally.
Mob rules…until it doesn’t.
The lessons learned still stand
Yet there’s always a bright side, isn’t there? There’s always a lesson to be learned, even in situations where the ugly underbelly of the human psyche is unceremoniously exposed. Perhaps the lesson learned is revealed when a person is stomped to death by a group of angry men, led by a shorter-than-average Southern European male who has a chip on his shoulder that almost rivals his physical height.
Or maybe it’s an unforgettable lesson in the importance of family; just knowing that you can show up at your mama’s house at 2 am with a group of friends in tow and be served a full-on home-cooked meal…well, that means something.
Knowing that you can show up at your mama’s house at 2 am with a group of friends in tow and be served a full-on home-cooked meal…that means something.
Pride. Food. Family. Love. They’re all there, and more.
So what can one take away from this classic mobster flick, other than the obvious? So many lessons. Here are just a few.
On Food
- Food is the common thread that exists between your old life and your (perhaps temporary) one. As such, treat meal preparation with reverence, wherever you are.
- It’s never too late for a late, late, late-night meal at mama’s.
- For the best results, cut your garlic as razor thin — literally — as possible.
On Humour
- Laugh heartily even if the joke you’ve been told is not funny — your life may depend on it. Literally.
- Learn to take a joke and not take everything too seriously. If someone teases you, it’s no big deal, really. No need to get a chip on your shoulder which causes you to retaliate with violence…or death.
On Pride
- Don’t be too proud, ever. This applies whether you’re on your first date with someone whom you’re trying to impress, or with a bunch of friends in a bar. In the latter scenario, don’t let your pride allow you to act foolishly or violently. See “On Humour,” above.
- Don’t be too proud to admit you’re wrong or that you’ve been defeated. You will be wrong and you will be defeated. Both experiences are part of life, whether you’re a gangster or not.
On Relationships
- It’s all about your connections and network — whether you’re in the mob or the rat race (and speaking of rats…). Remember the old adages: “You are the company you keep,” and “Lay down with dogs, wake up with fleas.”
- Sometimes you just have to “fake it til you make it,” whether it’s in relation to a love interest, a law enforcement officer or a capo.
On Life
- Loyalty, while admirable, can be a double-edged sword. Proceed with caution
- Take each day as it comes. You never know what’s just around the corner (or at the bar, or in the trunk).
- Treasure each moment as if it is your last. It may very well be.