The Lockdown and what a guy from Brooklyn learned from it.

The 12 Question Challenge

I was tagged by Aurora Eliam, CMP for this 12 Question challenge and thought it time that I responded. Here’s my take on the last 2 months and what impact it has had.

1 What have you missed the most during this lockdown? That sense of certainty, whether real or imagined, that everything would eventually be okay. Doubt has crept in. Pushed its way through an open window when I wasn’t looking. Sat in the chair next to the TV and waits. Never saying anything, just letting its presence alter our lives in a way we weren’t expecting.

2 What is the best thing about being in a lockdown? Closeness. To my wife, my cat. My life, the one I kept at arm’s length most of the time. Afraid, I suppose, that too close an inspection would find the warts and those age lines forming around the eyes and mouth. That maybe it wasn’t all I had wanted it to be. Well, it is and more. That’s a relief. 😊

3 What has been the worst thing about being in lockdown? Too much time. Time is at its best when it’s moving swiftly. Taking with it all those moments that didn’t quite work out, or were formed incorrectly and were rejected. Too much time allows for too close an inspection. Reality is best served in small amounts.

4 Who would you have liked to host in your home during the lockdown and why? Albert Einstein. I’d want him to take me through the theory of relativity and how he arrived at E=MC2. I’ve always felt that therein in lies the answer to intergalactic travel and Warp Drive. I’d like to build a ship that could travel to the stars and I figure, he’d make a good co-pilot.

5 What have you discovered about yourself in the lockdown? That who I was, when I wanted to be, what I am now, was already just fine.

6 What did you eat (or drink) the most during the lockdown? Margaritas. I had maybe 4 margaritas from January 2019 through February 2020. I’ve had about 15 in the last three weeks. Something about the ones we get from Los Gringos, have an inexplicably existential effect on life and are somehow capable of bending reality for up to 3 hours with each glass. In a lockdown situation, these are as vital as toilet paper and clean undies.

7 Apart from sleeping and working, what activities did you undertake the most during the lockdown? Writing. I have written more in the last two months, then in the previous 5 years combined. I have held more nouns and verbs in my arms and whispered more sweetly to them, than I have in decades. I have rekindled my love affair with the English language and we are once again, going steady. Please don’t tell my wife!

8 Will you come out of lockdown heavier or lighter? Heavier in heart, yes. Heavier with the weight of knowing those who have passed, yes. Heavier, for having taken on more responsibility for people I didn’t know, who are now my friends and colleagues, indeed. But lighter, for the words, and ideas and feelings that I have shed through my writing.

9 What resource has helped you the most during the lockdown? Medium and ILLUMINATION and my broadband connection. I have not cussed at Spectrum Cable once in the past 2 months — that is an all-time record. We are not reconciled, but our relationship is more amicable. Oh, and Hulu -Netflix -Britbox and Acorn TV. Though my total hours of viewing pleasure have remained flat throughout. For this, my eyes and mind are thankful.

10 What is your top tip for other people in lockdown right now? Make no major decisions during lockdown. Take notes, reflect as much as is needed, but wait for release, before pulling that trigger. Swearing off driving forever, 5 seconds after an accident, is never a wise decision. Wait. Reconsider. Then decide.

11 How has lockdown changed you? I am more afraid, but less scared. More concerned, but with fewer doubts than I’ve ever had. I have locked eyes with Reality and fucking dared it to blink and thus far am on the winning side of more areas of my life then when I entered the lockdown. Can I recount each moment of change — not a chance. I am more worried about man now, but far more confident in Mankind. It hasn’t been an easy journey, but in some 1960s, acid-related context, it’s made me a better person.

12 If you were to leave a ‘message in a bottle’ for the future, what would you say? Sorry, we really screwed the pooch and left you a bigger mess than we inherited. It wasn’t our intention to do so, but you know what they say about intentions. I’d like to blame every fucking US politician from 1950 to 2020 for the cluster fuck, we are currently residing in. But alas, most of them haven’t taken any responsibility for the last 70 years, why would I expect that to change. No, it’s us. We did it. All of us. Every last adult. Children are exempt. We got complacent. We got lazy. We pushed the button, or made our little black marks while electing too many people who simply couldn’t think, couldn’t keep it in their pants, or couldn’t tell who they actually worked for, if that message was tattooed on their forehead. We gave our vote so little importance that we sold them for an ice cream cone and a card on our birthdays. Again, sorry about that. Sincerely hope that you learn from our mistakes and do a better job. Now that you know what a Fucking Mess actually looks like, you’ll have no excuse. Sorry about that too.

One last question, where are you? Wow, another existential question. Ostensibly, or geographically, I am in Southern California. Have been for 40+ years. Originally born in Brooklyn. That’s still the place that my genes look to when trying to figure shit out. Beyond that … in a place that looks far different than the one I envisioned I’d be in, back in 1972. That’s the year I left New York and ended up here. No, regrets. Well, a few. But what can you do? Technology wise — whew, far more advanced than I ever thought. Well, I did think we’d have a transporter, like on Star Trek, by now. No, I actually did. Big letdown, for those out there listening. Otherwise, I’m about where I thought I would be, when I wasn’t thinking too much about it.

Joe Luca is writer and editor for ILLUMINATION and a published author and writer of children’s stories, short fiction, non-fiction articles, screenplays and poetry. Publications include Child’s Life, Children’s Playmate and others. There are some other articles below — have a read. And thank you for stopping by.