Illumination Writing Challenge
The Leftover Lemons of Life
33 lines about too many lemons
Life gave me lemons one day But I knew just what to do
I made up a batch of lemonade Then I smiled and dusted off my hands; proud of my accomplishment when I was through
Seemed I had life by the short hairs I knew how to crack the code
For I read the hack on self-help website That you simply turn the tables on life, when yours begins to implode
That seemed like reasonable logic So, I sat at a card table in the front yard with my vat of lemonade, self-righteous and smug
For I knew it was only a matter of time Before the world cut a path to my front door, anxious to get themselves a mug
Sanctimoniously secure that all would want to get their hands on my victory juice I waited for the crowds to form and for the lines to begin to queue
In fact, I even worried a bit that I wouldn’t have enough to go around Thinking that if too many were denied my elixir, surely it seemed, that riots would ensue
But boy was I surprised when no one showed up that first day Perhaps they didn’t get the memo I mused, certainly they would flock if they only knew
What a battle I had fought, my demons vanquished one by one I had converted hurdle to opportunity, transforming sure defeat into an astounding coup
But they didn’t come the second day either, nor the third or even the eighth My delicious refreshing concoction of success began to ferment, skin over and roil.
The liquid in the vat slowly turned so offensive and nasty It got to the point that even when I looked inside, I could not help but recoil
I couldn’t understand how they could do this to me, the world and its advice I did exactly what they said I should do, turning misfortune into a smile
No one ever told me that I had to do anything else And now I was stuck with a leftover vat of decomposing, scummy, pungent lemon bile
Well, let me tell you friend An important lesson was learned by me during this putrid affair
When life gives you lemons, there is but one thing leftover to do Ditch them in someone else’s yard in the middle of the night
Yuck, lemons. Gross.
This poetic riposte is my response to Holly Jahangiri‘s tag of me in a challenge to keep an everlasting poem bouncing around after it was started by Martin Rushton here:
Holly’s prompt was to write of “Happiness”, which, of course, she knocked out of the park as always:
Holly suggested the prompt “Life, Lemons and Leftovers” to me and a few others. At the time of my writing I noticed that Elisabeth Khan had responded along with Eli Snow who produced this offering.
Because I like to laugh and these people have all produced at least one out of me either intentionally or not, I am going to tag P.G. Barnett, Charles Roast, Sherry McGuinn, T. Mark Mangum, B. A. Cumberlidge., Joe Luca, Alison Tennent and Chris Hedges.
Your prompt, should you choose to accept it, is: “Like a bat out of hell”. I can only imagine what creative bounty will be produced, and I cannot wait to read it.
Good luck poeming!
(Tree Langdon ♾️ gave me permission to make up my own words, so, yes, Poeming is a word.)
If you like this, you might like some of my other recent writing, including my July daily roundup of writing challenges:
And a recent response to a prior challenge:
And this blast from the past:
Timothy Key spent over 26 years in the fire service as a firefighter/paramedic and various fire chief management roles. He firmly believes that bad managers destroy more than companies, and good managers create a passion that is contagious. Compassion, grace and gratitude drive the world; or at least they should. Follow me on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter, and join the mail list.
