Inspiration and Life

The Importance of Emotional Intelligence

What exactly is emotional intelligence?

What is emotional intelligence, and do you need it? You have likely read and heard the term many times. Emotional intelligence is also commonly referred to as EI or EQ (emotional quotient). Let’s look at what EI is and what it can do for you.

The history of emotional intelligence

The first mention of EI occurred in a paper by Michael Beldoch in 1964. When Daniel Goleman published his bestselling book in 1995, Emotional Intelligence — Why it can matter more than IQ, the term went mainstream. It has since become an important attribute that is widely recognized.

Research shows that people with higher EI perform far better professionally and in life. If you have ever worked for someone with low EI, you know how difficult it can be! On the other hand, if you have worked with or for someone with a high degree of EI, you know firsthand how much more pleasant it is.

“In a very real sense we have two minds, one that thinks and one that feels” Daniel Goleman (1946-present)

While many of us think we are rational beings, neuroscience disagrees. Yes, we can be rational, but emotions rule at our core. We are emotional beings, after all!

Let’s clear up once and for all what EI is and how it applies in our lives.

What are emotions?

Did you know emotions are contagious? Yes, it is true you will unconsciously mimic the emotional expressions of those around you. Another curious fact about emotions is that you can lift your emotional state by forcing a smile. Additionally, your emotional state changes by simply acting or carrying yourself a certain way.

Are you aware colors affect your emotions and mood? The color blue tends to create tranquility, while red stimulates. Green is calming, while yellow is cheery. Black is the color of authority, while white symbolizes innocence or purity. Purple connotes luxury, whereas brown often creates a feeling of wistfulness.

Another interesting fact is your emotions affect your mood? Although emotions are usually short-lived, lasting only minutes, moods can last for hours or days.

Where do feelings fit into all of this? Feelings are the conscious experience of emotions, lasting longer than emotions but less than moods. In many cases, emotions drive feelings, and feelings act as the input to creating your mood.

What is emotional intelligence?

Let’s look at four popular definitions to understand EI better.

Oxford Dictionary: emotional intelligence (noun) — the capacity to be aware of, control, and express one’s emotions, and to handle interpersonal relationships judiciously and empathetically.

Psychology Today: Emotional intelligence refers to the ability to identify and manage one’s own emotions, as well as the emotions of others.

Mayer & Salovey: Emotional intelligence is the ability to perceive emotions, to access and generate emotions so as to assist thought, to understand emotions and emotional knowledge, and to reflectively regulate emotions so as to promote emotional and intellectual growth.

Lynn Leadership Group: Emotional intelligence is generally said to include at least three skills: emotional awareness, or the ability to identify and name one’s own emotions; the ability to harness those emotions and apply them to tasks like thinking and problem solving; and the ability to manage emotions, which includes both regulating one’s own emotions when necessary and helping others to do the same.

You will often find the term EQ (Emotional Quotient) discussed alongside EI. EQ, like IQ (Intelligence Quotient), is measurable. IQ testing consists of standardized tests, whereas EQ does not. However, tests for both EQ and IQ produce valuable results.

There are several good EQ assessments available. I find The Index for Emotional Intelligence from the Lynn Leadership Group and their validated 360 Assessment to be two of the best EQ assessments available today.

“Researchers have found that even more than IQ, your emotional awareness and abilities to handle feelings will determine your success and happiness in all walks of life, including family relationships.” John Gottman (1942-present)

The five components of emotional intelligence

While there are variations in the number of EI components, one of the clearest is the Lynn Leadership Group’s five parts. They show EI as:

• Self-awareness and control
• Empathy
• Social expertness
• Personal influence
• Mastery of purpose

Self-awareness and control are needed to effectively understand yourself while using the information to manage your emotions and behaviors.

Empathy is the ability to listen and fully comprehend the perspective of others. It involves understanding other people’s needs, concerns, and emotions while picking up emotional cues.

Social expertness is the ability to build genuine relationships and bonds in your life. It is to express caring and concern while dealing effectively with conflict.

Personal influence is the ability to lead and inspire others as well as yourself in a positive manner.

Mastery of purpose is the ability to bring authenticity to your life and live out your values. It is understanding your purpose and taking action on it in your life.

Working on each of these five areas can enhance your EI and significantly improve your relationships. Imagine how this can help you build your career and a happier, more fulfilled life!

“It is very important to understand that emotional intelligence is not the opposite of intelligence, it is not the triumph of heart over head — it is the unique intersection of both.” David Caruso (1956-present)

Final thoughts

I hope this brief article has given you more insight into EI and its importance in your life. Enhancing EI is a sure path to success and will provide you with the best relationships and career possible.

If you wish to improve your EI, you will find abundant information online and in numerous videos on YouTube. The most effective way to enhance your EQ is to work with a professional coach trained in EI.

Why not invest the time to research the subject and consider working with a coach to help you? You, your career, and your life are worth the investment!

I leave you with the following quote to contemplate as it is crucial to your future.

“Emotional intelligence, more than any other factor, more than I.Q. or expertise, accounts for 85% to 90% of success at work… I.Q. is a threshold competence. You need it, but it doesn’t make you a star. Emotional intelligence can.” Warren G. Bennis (1925–2014)

LinkedIn |Twitter| Medium| UncommonSense| AmazonAuthorPage | Parlor

Bill Abbate Leadership Writer and Editor in ILLUMINATION

Thank you for reading this article! If you enjoyed it, please check out the others below!