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Abstract

f, that’s who. If fighting really is beneficial to a relationship then could it be beneficial when one is alone?</p><p id="bb3f">Okay, let us imagine a fictional human being who has been living alone for 25 years. Let’s say that fictional human only had one fight with herself/himself in all those 25 years. Would you consider that fictional human to be a saint? An enlightened master?</p><p id="c863">Or cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs?</p><p id="b08d">Perhaps when fighting with oneself that fighting can be beneficial, provided, of course, that it is a conscious, alert fighting rather than just the re-playing of mind pattern loops. Maybe the best thing to do when fighting with oneself is to not participate, to not pick sides but rather simply to observe the fighting from a safe distance. In being the observer of the fight rather than a participant then much can learned. And what could be energy-draining fighting turns into peaceful revelations of the conflict inherent in all things and the surrender to the flow of love moving undeterred through all things.</p><p id="99d9">And could the detachment of being in the observer mode also reap more benefits of fighting among fictional spouses?</p><p id="f1a2">Do you know any real spouses that fight all the time? Do you consider their relationship strong and healthy? Do you know any real spouses that never fight? How does their relationship compare?</p><p id="97cb">And do you know any real humans who fight with themselves all the time? How do you compare them to those real humans who never seem to be fighting with themselves?</p><p id="2453">Is fighting to a person’s state of mind what roughage is to a person’s colon? Does it help initiate peristalsis and movement? Is it healthy? Does it drain that person’s energy or does it in some way inform and empower them?</p><p id="ebfb">It is always good to <b>observe</b> what is going on.</p><p id="aaf5"><i>Copyright by White Feather. All R

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ights Reserved. <a href="https://readmedium.com/white-feather-archive-index-c95167f7dbaf"></a></i><a href="https://readmedium.com/white-feather-archive-index-c95167f7dbaf"><b>White Feather Archive Index</b></a></p><p id="5289"><i>More:</i></p><div id="ca65" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/the-birds-buddha-and-a-flower-fd67bc2eabc2"> <div> <div> <h2>The Birds, Buddha and a Flower</h2> <div><h3>On the importance of laughter</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*pznrTx-Pi-Rx9f0ZBcy6-w.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="1582" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/comfort-and-joy-ee5f14c1b4a3"> <div> <div> <h2>Comfort and Joy</h2> <div><h3>Change is not a spectator sport</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*KTYeKDnLAsTP767t9ZhBjA.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="695b" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/what-is-divine-intervention-8d3ce6761faf"> <div> <div> <h2>What is Divine Intervention?</h2> <div><h3>And where does it come from?</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*xr4qPIZmgRCztt491isZHA.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

The Idiot Who Refused to Fight

Don’t be that idiot!

Once upon a time there was a fictional wife and husband who were married for 25 years. During that entire 25-year marriage they only had one fight.

Only one!

Would you consider that to be a sign of a truly strong and healthy relationship? Or would you consider that disturbing?

Now what if you learned that the marriage lasted that long with only one fight because one of the fictional spouses hated conflict so much that they always immediately backed down from any potential argument or fight — just to maintain the peace? Even if that fictional spouse new in their heart that they were right about something or had an important yet divisive point to express they would back down and submit to what the other fictional spouse decreed just to avoid any possibility of conflict.

While this may appear to be maintaining peace, is it really healthy? Do you hear the crack of a whip in the background? But who is whipping whom? Could self-whipping be involved?

Once upon a time, long, long ago, back when I was young and ignorant, I used to think that if there was any fighting at all in a relationship then it obviously meant that the relationship was dysfunctional and not to be. After all, if two people are perfect for each other and are truly in love with each other then there simply is no reason for conflict.

Could I have been wrong all those years ago?

Can fighting be a healthy, nurturing part of a relationship?

And what about if you are not in a relationship? Who are you going to fight with then?

Yourself, that’s who. If fighting really is beneficial to a relationship then could it be beneficial when one is alone?

Okay, let us imagine a fictional human being who has been living alone for 25 years. Let’s say that fictional human only had one fight with herself/himself in all those 25 years. Would you consider that fictional human to be a saint? An enlightened master?

Or cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs?

Perhaps when fighting with oneself that fighting can be beneficial, provided, of course, that it is a conscious, alert fighting rather than just the re-playing of mind pattern loops. Maybe the best thing to do when fighting with oneself is to not participate, to not pick sides but rather simply to observe the fighting from a safe distance. In being the observer of the fight rather than a participant then much can learned. And what could be energy-draining fighting turns into peaceful revelations of the conflict inherent in all things and the surrender to the flow of love moving undeterred through all things.

And could the detachment of being in the observer mode also reap more benefits of fighting among fictional spouses?

Do you know any real spouses that fight all the time? Do you consider their relationship strong and healthy? Do you know any real spouses that never fight? How does their relationship compare?

And do you know any real humans who fight with themselves all the time? How do you compare them to those real humans who never seem to be fighting with themselves?

Is fighting to a person’s state of mind what roughage is to a person’s colon? Does it help initiate peristalsis and movement? Is it healthy? Does it drain that person’s energy or does it in some way inform and empower them?

It is always good to observe what is going on.

More:

The Birds, Buddha and a Flower

On the importance of laughter

medium.com

Comfort and Joy

Change is not a spectator sport

medium.com

What is Divine Intervention?

And where does it come from?

medium.com