The Dilemma in “Branding”
As someone trying to “brand” myself in order to find a place in the masses of online production, I have only one place to start: me. I have tried poetry on Instagram — more than once. The second time was better, but I still didn’t have the chops to make it count. And my resentment and resistance to soul-sucking industries making money off of each human’s innate desire to be seen just win out. Every. Single. Time. But hey, I tried.
When I look at myself in the context of branding, I feel the need to choose one of me — one piece of who I am to expose to the world. But without one piece of me, there isn’t that other piece. And without that piece, there is not this piece. Is this resonating for you, too? So. Once again, a dilemma that leads me to another dreaded decision. Who am I? Or, rather, which part of me does the world care enough about *right now* or need to see *right now*? The thing is, that diminishes me still. I am one and I am all. I can’t fill you in on everything, but leaving pieces out feels more like nothing. I know you get it.
But. There are some pieces of me that prove to be helpful. I will export these.
- Motherhood: I have two kids under age three; they are 21 months apart. I am tired. If you hear this, so are you. There are countless bags to unpack here.
- Recovery: I haven’t used an illicit substance in over eight years. I was born out of the Oxycontin era and quickly found heroin. I was addicted for years. I have a story to tell. And with Fentanyl deaths at an all time high, I will hopefully have some (helpful) wisdom.
- Career/Working (or not working) Mom: I was in the middle of my Master’s program when I gave birth to my first daughter. I got a job as a Project Director when I was eight months pregnant with my second daughter and two months away from graduating with my Master’s. All this, mid-pandemic, with a husband deep in medical school in a socially (even before Covid) isolating place. For those of you who hear that, you know the inevitable single parenting that comes along with being a “med school spouse.” (Ew. I think I just threw up in my mouth a little. Did that just come out of my mouth?). More on that later.
Needless to say, I have perspective to offer. Oh, one more thing:
4. Poetry: My first love. This will be scattered about, along with random writings and artwork. They all deserve a place. They all need a place.
So, as you ponder my “brand,” I will let Walt Whitman sum this up and take us out:
“Do I contradict myself? / Very well then I contradict myself, / (I am large, I contain multitudes)”
And I will end by saying this: I hope to see you along for the ride.
Thanks for reading.