The Biggest Lesson I Learned in 2023.

One we all need to learn at some point if we wish to live with little to no regrets.

‘Live with authenticity, no matter what it costs you.’

My counselor said this to me a long time ago, yet just recently, I’m starting to realize what she meant.

I’ve been constantly daydreaming these past few months (probably longer than that).

I’ve been daydreaming about traveling and working on other projects besides writing. I’ve been daydreaming of living life the way I’ve wished for a while.

The funny part is I just realized all of these things are within my control and possible now.

Everything is possible. You just need a plan to make it a reality.

As soon as this thought hit me, I started thinking of a way to make these daydreams a possibility.

I’ve already come up with a plan to travel more frequently (starting locally). All I need to do is budget myself and schedule things accordingly.

But these are not the reasons why I’m finally learning this lesson.

It’s finally starting to sink in because:

1. When you don’t live authentically, you shut down parts of yourself.

Important parts.

I’ve been feeling like something is missing.

I’ve felt off and like I’m not moving in the world how I want to.

And I have to be honest and say it’s my fault because I’ve been making decisions based on ‘should.’

I should do this because it’s what’s proper, normal, expected, etc.

I’m not saying I’m trying to be reckless, not at all. I’m saying I haven’t been authentic.

I’ve been putting off things I wish I had started doing—for example, recording and uploading YouTube videos. I started in 2021 but fell off the wagon and have been thinking about returning since.

I’ve been ignoring or pushing away these ideas, plans, and dreams for some time now, and it’s taking a toll.

I’m not feeding my creative self, I’m not nurturing my adventurous spirit, I’m neglecting the dreamer in me.

And when you do that, you start becoming a shell of the person you’re supposed to be.

You start forgetting why you’re doing what you’re doing and what matters to you most.

I realize I’m headed that way, and I’m glad I’m being honest with myself about it because I want and need to make some profound changes if I want to nurture who I am and who I want to be again.

2. When you don’t live authentically, you don’t allow yourself the opportunity to live up to your potential.

Living authentically also means taking risks and getting out of your comfort zone.

When you’re making decisions based on ‘should,’ you’re playing it safe.

I’m not saying you should always be taking risks, but there’s certainly a healthy balance between the two — the recipe for moving forward.

I feel like I’ve been playing it safe for the past two years. Not doing much to push myself out of my comfort zone.

And when I do, I’m only dipping my big toe in the water.

Now that two years have passed, I regret not being bolder and more daring.

I regret not starting or continuing to work on my ideas these past two years.

I’m growing tired of playing it safe, of playing it how I think I ‘should’ play.

I’m tired of it because it’s not me or who I want to be.

3. When you don’t live authentically, you become resentful.

I’m also becoming bitter and jaded, and that is the last thing I want to be.

Since I’m growing tired of how I’ve been making decisions, I’m also becoming resentful of what I’m not doing but wish I did.

And the hardest pill to swallow is that it’s no one’s fault but mine.

I’m the one at fault for not realizing this sooner.

I’m the one at fault for trying to convince myself this is how I should be and how I should make decisions.

My life is my responsibility.

What I do and don’t do is and always will be my fault.

I’m at a stage in my life where I have mostly a blank canvas in front of me. I can paint it however I want to, but rather than treating this canvas like a future masterpiece, I’m treating it like a school art project.

I’m not cherishing the opportunity in front of me.

Many of us have been doing this, and it’s time to be honest with ourselves so we can start making the changes we’ve been longing for.

Let’s make the decision to live more authentically.

Whether that’s dressing more like the style you wish, changing how you eat, changing your workout routine, or starting to work on personal side-projects.

Let’s all start doing what we said we wanted to do now and continue it into and throughout 2024.

I want us all a year from now to see all our progress and be content and joyful about it.

I want us all to look back at 2024 and see this year as the year we all lived more authentically and moved closer to who we want to be and the life we want to live.