SHOW OFF!
A New Star is Born — My Acceptance Speech on Becoming Medium’s Top Writer
Once a top writer, always a top writer
I submitted my first story on Medium on October 6th. After fifty-five days, four thousand views, two thousand reads, and eight hundred fans — I have received the most coveted, the Oscar of writing, the Pulitzer of Medium — a top writer badge.
I want to thank the Academy err… the Medium algorithm for picking me as a Top Writer in Reading. Wait. That doesn’t sound right. What does that even mean? Who cares?
I want to thank all the eh!ditors and their teams whom I allowed publishing my not-so-esteemed work in their top-of-the-world publications. Yeah, right! If you hate tag blankets — here is one for you — Christine Stevens, Robert Ralph, Winston, Dr Mehmet Yildiz, KiKi Walter, and Susan Brearley.
I want to thank my wife, who had to go through the unedited versions of my work. She never understood any of them. Not until I explained to her what I was trying to say. Honey, I love you, and thank you for not divorcing me, yet.
I thank my parents, sister, brother-in-law, niece, and nephew. I created their dummy Medium accounts to clap and comment on my stories. I still managed not to have a 100% read ratio or one thousand claps on none of my stories.
I thank my boss, colleagues, clients, friends, family, lawyers, doctors, therapists, psychiatrists, insurance agents, and car insurance agents. I know I have been MIA because I was busy writing. Your sacrifices are acknowledged and appreciated.
Last but not the least, I want to thank my readers and the entire Medium community who read my work and still clapped and commented. If you didn’t, I have these famous words for you.
As KiKi Walter would put it, this douche rocket has launched into WABOL space (google it). 🚀
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