The 3 Hard Truths You Need to Know to Live the Best Life Possible

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hat could be replaced with more empowering language such as <i>‘I choose to, I want to, I prioritise’. </i>Often times you will find that ‘shoulds’ tend to make us feel pressurised, heavy and resistant to it. But if we adopt a different frame such as <i>‘How can I make this work for myself?’</i> it builds self-agency and empowers us to move towards it.</p><blockquote id="294a"><p>“Repeated patterns of neural activity leave lasting traces behind. Like water coming down a hillside. You have the power inside yourself every minute of every day to use your mind, to change your brain, to change your mind for the better.” —Rick Hanson</p></blockquote><p id="00ab">As I’ve shared in a previous piece about <a href="https://readmedium.com/all-that-we-are-is-the-result-of-what-we-have-thought-40ca1ede0654">the wheel of belief</a>, our realities and outcomes all start from the thoughts we have and language is a centrepiece to changing our thoughts.</p><p id="35a1">I challenge you to pay attention to what you say to yourself each day, and especially when you are facing challenges or stressful situations. It can also be a constant running tape at the back of your mind that has become a second nature.</p><p id="f511">I’ve realised even things like saying <i>‘I always don’t have enough time’ </i>could also be a limiting belief and creates a disempowered and overwhelmed state and reality of feeling constantly behind and stressed.</p><p id="4a54">At the end of the day, the truth is — we always have time for what matters most to us. It’s about being mindful, intentional of what we let in our space and where we choose to dedicate our precious time and energy on.</p><p id="9f91">What I’m sharing here is all about taking charge of your own life and owning what matters to you. It’s a constant and ongoing practice of being extremely honest with yourself, evaluating your priorities and cutting through all the excuses we come up for ourselves and staying stuck in situations.</p><p id="c95f">Like everything, it’s a muscle that can be built. Whether it is saying no, listening to yourself or having a more positive self-talk, the more you build on it, the more it gro

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ws and eventually becomes natural to you. But it all begins with an intention set in place in rising to create higher standards for you and your life, and truly start living from the inside out.</p><p id="6ad0">If you’ve enjoyed this piece, here are some of my other work on mindset work and personal growth:</p><div id="af04" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/how-to-stop-being-a-people-pleaser-4758af7609d0"> <div> <div> <h2>How to Stop Being a People Pleaser</h2> <div><h3>And Start Living Your Life</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*tXsNZZ_LTLJW0Emt)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="179c" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/3-things-to-do-in-times-of-change-286cfd38f689"> <div> <div> <h2>3 Things to Do In Times of Change</h2> <div><h3>‘Trade Your Expectations for Appreciation’ — Tony Robbins</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*C0zfvbaUwoV8xRSdTVfkkQ.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="e9b3" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/the-only-way-to-have-breakthroughs-ask-tough-questions-2608acd9ca72"> <div> <div> <h2>The Only Way to Have Breakthroughs: Ask Tough Questions</h2> <div><h3>They say, “If you haven’t found the answer, you haven’t asked a good enough question yet.”</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*wB0ldLQYSv_zrxAH)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

1. NOBODY CARES

Seriously, the amount of time we spend thinking about what others think of us is completely futile. It is exhausting to live from a space of constantly living up to expectations or letting the external dictate you. We need to learn to orient our world from within, from what truly matters to us and be selective in what we take in from others.

Of course, there is a fine line between rejecting feedback to constantly trying to please everyone, but what I’m saying is to have extreme clarity on what is your focus and direction no matter what is going on outside. At the end of the day, it’s YOU living YOUR life, not somebody else!

2. You will ALWAYS disappoint someone

Following on from point 1, the quicker you learn this, the easier your life will be. This is something that is quite hard to digest especially if you have been conditioned to ‘do it all’, not upset anyone. But slowly, you can also learn to become a professional disappointer and create the intentional space and focus that best serves you. As Steve Job who champions focus and simplicity puts it:

“People think focus means saying yes to the thing you’ve got to focus on. But that’s not what it means at all. It means saying no to the hundred other good ideas that there are. You have to pick carefully.

3. You are what you repeatedly tell yourself

Watch your language. ‘I can’t, I have to, I should’ — these are all words that could be replaced with more empowering language such as ‘I choose to, I want to, I prioritise’. Often times you will find that ‘shoulds’ tend to make us feel pressurised, heavy and resistant to it. But if we adopt a different frame such as ‘How can I make this work for myself?’ it builds self-agency and empowers us to move towards it.

“Repeated patterns of neural activity leave lasting traces behind. Like water coming down a hillside. You have the power inside yourself every minute of every day to use your mind, to change your brain, to change your mind for the better.” —Rick Hanson

As I’ve shared in a previous piece about the wheel of belief, our realities and outcomes all start from the thoughts we have and language is a centrepiece to changing our thoughts.

I challenge you to pay attention to what you say to yourself each day, and especially when you are facing challenges or stressful situations. It can also be a constant running tape at the back of your mind that has become a second nature.

I’ve realised even things like saying ‘I always don’t have enough time’ could also be a limiting belief and creates a disempowered and overwhelmed state and reality of feeling constantly behind and stressed.

At the end of the day, the truth is — we always have time for what matters most to us. It’s about being mindful, intentional of what we let in our space and where we choose to dedicate our precious time and energy on.

What I’m sharing here is all about taking charge of your own life and owning what matters to you. It’s a constant and ongoing practice of being extremely honest with yourself, evaluating your priorities and cutting through all the excuses we come up for ourselves and staying stuck in situations.

Like everything, it’s a muscle that can be built. Whether it is saying no, listening to yourself or having a more positive self-talk, the more you build on it, the more it grows and eventually becomes natural to you. But it all begins with an intention set in place in rising to create higher standards for you and your life, and truly start living from the inside out.

If you’ve enjoyed this piece, here are some of my other work on mindset work and personal growth: