The № 1 Secret to Success and How to Use It Right

Inspired by 20+ years of studying successful people

You think it’s hard work, don’t you?

It’s not. Hard work is no. 2 and quite useless without no. 1.

Or did you think it was being good at what you do? Apologies to the very idealistic of you. But it doesn’t even make it to the top 3.

Meet my friend Sarah. She used to be a very successful entrepreneur in the city I live in.

A couple of years ago she decided to quit being a freelancer because it was too much hassle and joined the corporate world. With all her experience she landed a very well-paid consulting job at a top company.

Sarah looks as if she swallowed the sun. When she comes into the room, everything is brighter. When she smiles, which she does often, she does it from head to toe. Her beautiful blue eyes light up and she always has a good word to say to whoever she meets.

She always remembers your name. Always looks you straight in the eye and touches your arm when you speak. Also, she laughs harder than anyone else at your jokes.

Sarah is the go-to person for anyone when they need to be introduced to some other influential person. Because Sarah knows everybody, talks to everybody and is herself a beautiful soul.

But nobody would appreciate her soul if they weren’t able to see it, right?

Do you see where I’m going with this?

Meet president Volodymyr Zelenskyy . He needs no introduction. He is the president of a small country in a dire situation. Faced with an unfair war, he decided to stand his ground against forces way bigger than he had ever anticipated would be against him.

You rarely see him smile. On the contrary, you see him concerned, yet steely. A rock for his country, an example of strength for the world.

Admired by most, in a world where it’s becoming more and more difficult to raise anyone’s attention, let alone admiration.

Sadly, however, Zeleneskyy’s brave little nation would have fallen a long time ago if they hadn’t gotten help from a plethora of countries.

Apart from much-disputed political reasons, a fact remains: Zelenskyy is visible most days on social media and television talking to his compatriots people and addressing the whole world. Addressing each and every president and person of power out there.

And he gets help. Tons of it.

Without him stepping up to the plate, how many would have come to his aid?

See a pattern here?

I know you do and if you’re anything like me, I know you don’t like it.

The no. 1 secret to success is the dreaded networking.

Whether you like it or not, it’s key.

Without it, you can work as hard as you want, you can be as good as you want. No one will see your work. No one will know that you exist. No one will care because there’s no one to care for. Without them, you are non-existent.

Humans are social creatures. You, just like me and everybody else, are genetically conditioned to protect and stand with those belonging to your tribe. That’s what you do through networking — you become part of a tribe that will, later on, protect you. Appreciate you. Love you. Buy, support, and in some cases read your work.

Meet Mona Lazar, aka me. I am not yet successful, but I do study successful people and as I mentioned in previous articles, try to replicate what they do.

Unless I interact with as many other Medium writers as possible, no one will read my work.

People are busy with their own lives.

Ain’t nobody got time for your stories! Unless you’ve got time for theirs. Then everybody got a little time…

Unless I read yours, you don’t read mine. I know it and it’s ok.

Unless I care about you, you won’t care about me. And isn’t that absolutely natural?

What people are doing wrong about networking is that they don’t truly care, they’re not really involved. They’re just going through the motions and the others can tell.

The ones who truly care, or genuinely want to read, or are really doing it for their country, or have a heart of gold, those succeed!

I’ve met a lot of successful people. I love being around them, listening to their stories, learning from their life, and being in their aura.

They are successful because they deserve it.

They don’t just use networking as a stepping stone to their success.

Networking is a part of them. They enjoy it and they’ve done it so much that they became naturals at it.

They don’t fake it! They live it!

And to that, they add hard work. And being good at what they do. But those wouldn’t work without the help of their tribe.

No man is an island. Not the successful ones, anyway.

Do the work, do it right, and earn your place among the greats.

Good networking starts with genuine care.

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