Tamara and I Talk Sex, Men, and Relationships
We’re really into each other, but…
My husband James and I have been seeing Tamara for close to two years now. It started as just a sexual thing, but now we’ve gotten quite attached to each other and are in some ways, a bit of a throuple. Tamara isn’t the first woman that I’ve been sexually involved with, but she is the first woman that I’ve had deep feelings for. I remember the first time that I realized that I loved her, right in the middle of having some pretty hot sex. She was just about to orgasm and I remember thinking, “I just want to make her happy. I love her so much!” Then I fucked her some more with my favorite glass dildo.
We’ve shared some really steamy moments and some really intimate ones. I adore kissing her and could just about do that all day. There is something about kissing women that is just different from kissing men, and although I definitely enjoy that too, it’s one of my very favorite things. Tamara seems to feel the same. One time when James was going down on her and I was just snuggled up next to her, playing with her breasts, she said to me, “Kiss me — if you kiss me, I think I can cum.” I did and sure enough, she did. It was very exciting but also really beautiful and intimate.
Tamara is the first woman I’ve played with who I think truly enjoys women as much as she enjoys men, and I am also really, really into her in a way that I’ve never been into any other woman. But we were talking the last time we were together about kissing women, sex, and men and we both admitted that although we really adore kissing women and having sex with them, that if we had to choose only one, we’d both choose men. That’s the kind of honest and transparent relationship that we have. We’re naked, sitting on her bed, in between fucking sessions and we’re talking about how we’d pick men if forced to choose only one. Fortunately, we aren’t forced to choose, and after a while, we went back to playing with each other — and James too, of course.
Sexuality is a continuum, or so I learned in college health class way back when. A few people are truly heterosexual and a few are truly homosexual, and the vast majority of everyone else is somewhere else along the continuum. It’s really mostly just programming and opportunity that keeps us from realizing this. Even though I believed what I learned in that class, I just never thought of myself as anything but entirely straight, mainly because I knew that I wasn’t gay.
Perhaps because it was just never on the table (until it finally was), I didn’t even really grasp how attracted I was to women until James and I opened up our relationship about 5 years ago. He’d agreed to do a threesome with another man with me if I would also do one with a woman with him. Fortunately, before we quite got to that point I’d had the chance to flirt with and kiss a couple of women so I knew more about how I felt about the situation going into it.
We played with that particular woman, as well as a few others here and there, for about a year and only stopped because we moved to another state. She was lovely, and I enjoyed our time together, but it was nowhere close to how into Tamara that I am. She’s beautiful and sexy, but also really genuine and kind. I feel free to be all of me when I’m with her and as I said before, I could just kiss her all day. Her skin and her lips are so soft and supple.
But even so, there is no substitute for real male genitals; there is no substitute for being folded into the arms of somebody who is infinitely stronger than you are. As much as I love Tam and enjoy being in a relationship with her, I still find myself more oriented towards men and apparently, she feels the same way. I don’t know how much of that is socialization and how much of that is just where we both naturally are on the continuum of sexuality, but it was certainly a bit of a funny juxtaposition to be naked in bed with my female lover casually talking about how, if ever forced to choose, we’d both choose men. Fortunately for us, we don’t have to make that choice.