Talking to the Universe on the Internet

Connections to land and people

Almost a week ago I posted a story, Just Waiting on a Decision. It was about moving energy and making things happen by first making decisions and how a firm decision goes out into the infinite field of infinite possibilities to coagulate the possibilities necessary to manifest the decision.

What I did not realize as I was writing that story is that the act of writing it was part of the process of making a decision. By writing it I was sending out my intentions to the universe.

Who knew that the universe reads the internet? Of course it makes sense since the internet is part of the universe just like every single other thing is part of the universe.

I was ruminating about two decisions that I was wanting to make. One involved retirement and the other involved geographic relocation. Due to financial considerations retirement seems utterly impossible right now so while writing and after writing that story I became very focused on geographic relocation. And I did it. I made a decision.

I decided that I am ‘going home’ to New Mexico. I have lived in scores of different places but New Mexico is the only place where I have truly felt at home. The tug in my heart to go back there has been quite palpable for years now but I never made a decision to move there. Well, now I have.

So how did the universe respond to my decision?

THE VERY NEXT DAY I got a phone call from a very dear friend. We have been very close friends for around a quarter of a century. We once, long ago, lived in the very same county in New Mexico. But we did not know each other then. We never met while living there. It was not until I moved away from New Mexico that I met her and our friendship began. Soon thereafter she moved away from New Mexico, too.

A deep love for the Land of Enchantment is something we have in common and we have often talked about how both of us would love to some day return. She called me to tell me that she made a very important decision. She told me that she decided that come hell or high water she was returning to New Mexico.

Wow. She had made the very decision that I was in the process of making!

There is some irony in our moving around the country. While we never knew each other while we were both living in New Mexico, both of our moving separately led us to the Great Plains of Turtle Island and now we are, once again, actually living in the same state.

But neither of us want to be here. For her, this is where she grew up. She thought she was ‘going home’ by moving back here but after being here for a while she realized that this place no longer feels like home; that New Mexico is her spiritual home. She no longer likes it here.

I never had any intention of moving here to the Great Plains. I have always had an inexplicable aversion to the region. While I had never lived here, whenever I traveled through the region I simply could not wait to get out. I ended up moving here through an unfortunate series of events. I certainly never moved here to ‘come home.’ (Or so I thought.)

Being on the Great Plains, I can feel a very deep sadness that lingers like a mist over the land. It is a personal thing. It is the result of having once lived here in another life. By linear time reckoning it was in the 1800s during the Great War between the native people and the invading tsunami of white people. I was living among the Lakota and was very much involved in this horrific war.

I have often felt that I ended up here on the Great Plains as an opportunity for me to do some karmic healing. There is a warrior that lives inside me in this current life that carries that karmic residue. I have endeavored to always keep him subdued but I know that he needs healing. But I have been afraid of letting him out in order to heal. (He is very scary.)

That sadness I feel on this beautiful land is the lingering sadness and anger the warrior from that other life strongly felt as he lived, played, fought, and died in the struggle of his people. He was a warrior who was profoundly defeated and the warrior inside me in my current life carries that sadness as well as a desire for revenge. It is understandable why I have always tried to keep him under wraps.

The universe responded to my geographic relocation decision making in another way. It brought me a movie. (Apparently, Hollywood is part of the universe, too.)

It is a relatively new movie entitled, Woman Walks Ahead. The film is based on true events and is set in the 1880s. It is the story of a white woman from New York City who is an artist (brilliantly played by the very talented actress Jessica Chastain). After her husband dies she leaves New York and travels to the Standing Rock Sioux Reservation in North Dakota with the express intention of painting a portrait of Sitting Bull (brilliantly played by the actor, Michael Gray Eyes).

I won’t spoil it by describing the movie except to say that it was very moving and beautiful. The cinematography of the Great Plains was breathtaking and the story of the coming together of a white woman and an iconic Indian Warrior was soul-touching. The conflict of that time was masterfully portrayed.

I apparently needed to see that movie to be reminded of the need for healing for the warrior within me. It reminded me of the beauty and sacredness of the Great Plains. It reminded me that after over seven years here on the Great Plains the healing that I came here for is not complete. Perhaps my desire to get the heck away from here is a form of running away from that sadness and anger — which, of course, does not provide healing.

So my dear friend calls me up to say that she made a decision to move back to New Mexico. But she is 74 years old and a recent stroke has made things difficult for her. So she offered me a deal. If I help her move to New Mexico she would help me move to New Mexico.

Is it not amazing how quickly the universe responds once decisions are made? Of course, what the universe is doing is opening windows to allow possibilities to come forth. Usually, several different possibilities show up and then it becomes our job to choose from available options. The universe is not going to do all the work for us.

So I was rather excited by the sudden offer from my friend. It seemed perfect in many ways. But there was something not quite right. It was a feeling I could not identify. So I cast an I Ching reading. Here is a snippet that stood out:

“If what you wish to undertake is a direct response to your present circumstances, then go ahead. If what you wish to do is an element in a strategy, if certain desired future results depend on it, then you had better not go ahead with it.” — I Ching, Sam Reifler translation

So I called my friend back and told her I would think about it. In the meantime I am focusing on my ‘present circumstances’ to see from various perspectives exactly what they are.

Plus I am waiting for the universe to throw a few more things through the window.

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