Stop Letting Chronic Overthinking Run Your Life

Simple practices to get out of your head and into your life.

Do you ever overthink so much that you can’t make a decision?

Are you guilty of daydreaming to the point you’re detached from what’s going on around you?

Have you ever made a mistake because you were in your head instead of taking action?

Overthinking can cripple you. It can make you miserable and ineffective at making decisions. If you allow it to persist, you will miss out on opportunities, new experiences, and peace of mind. You’ll frustrate people around you because you’re wishy-washy in your decision making.

No matter how hard you try, you can’t think your way out of a situation. Overthinking is not problem-solving.

The only thing that moves you forward in life is action.

If you find yourself stuck on an infinite loop of overthinking, I want to share some tactics I’ve used to overcome analysis paralysis.

Overthinking Causes Serious Problems

To think too much is a disease. — Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Everyone gets in stuck their head sometimes–and that’s okay. The ability to reflect on your experiences and learn from them is an essential trait of a healthy life.

The problem comes when overthinking is your default mode of operation. Like when faced with the daunting decision of choosing chicken or steak off the menu and you’re crippled by analysis paralysis.

Overthinking isn’t only a bad habit, it’s a serious threat to your well-being. If left unchecked, it can lead to:

• mental health problems
• emotional distress
• addiction
• loss of sleep
• obsessive rumination

The best way to stop overthinking is to learn how to disassociate with your worries and be more present.

When you’re in your head, you’re disconnected from what’s happening around you. When you’re present, you’re connected to your life.

Life can be remembered in the past, expected in the future, but only experienced in the present.

You can’t be connected to your life if you’re not present. When you’re in your head you miss the incredible things life has for now because your mind is somewhere else.

The 3 Types of Overthinking

There are 3 kinds of overthinking. I’m going to explain each one, then offer 3 simple ways I’ve used to stop overthinking. Are you with me?

The Carousel

When you’re stuck in your head you think in circles. You obsess over what-if scenarios, possible outcomes, and entertaining the same thoughts over and over again. You procrastinate, indulge in anxious thoughts, and can’t move forward because your mind is spinning in circles like a carousel.

This is also called rumination, which means going over a problem in your mind without completion. No solution, no end, only the anxiety of the same thoughts over and over.

Have you ever had conversations over and over in your head with someone who upset you? Then you’ve taken a ride on the carousel.

Getting stuck on the carousel means thinking in circles obsessing over what-ifs, possible outcomes, and the same thoughts over and over again.

When you’re on the carousel, you don’t solve any problems because you don’t take action.

Overthinking creates the illusion of doing something useful or making progress. But all you do is chase thoughts around like a dog chasing its tail.

Logging Out

When you overthink, you’re disconnected from here and now. You log out of reality and you’re no longer present.

You can’t live life to the fullest if you’re disconnected from what’s going on around you. You’ll cause yourself and others a lot of frustration because you aren’t paying attention.

When you’re disconnected from what’s happening around you, you’ll miss out on the opportunities that are right in front of you to live a fulfilling and meaningful life.

You can’t live life to the fullest if you’re not present because your mind is always somewhere else.

In the early years of my marriage, I always missed the dirty laundry, dust, and dishes because my mind was somewhere else. Noticing little things like this is important to my wife, so I’ve worked to get better at it over the years. If I stayed disconnected from what’s happening around me, I’d miss out on the opportunity to improve my relationship with my wife

Logging out is for computers, not your brain.

The Chatterbox

There’s a constant stream of narration running through your head–it’s just noise.

It’s nothing more than voices from the past, from culture, from our family, and random crap your brain spits out.

This chatter clouds your ability to think straight or get things done.

The chatterbox is the sabotaging thought that pops up right as we’re making headway:

• I’m not good enough.
• It’s never worked before.
• If I fail everyone will hate me.
• If I succeed everyone will hate me.
• I don’t even deserve success.
• I’m not lovable.
• It will always be this way.

That’s only the tip of the iceberg. Have you ever experienced this?

The chatterbox prevents you from taking action. It’s a force of nature that can wreck you. Author Steven Pressfield calls this the Resistance, which he describes as a kind of impersonal force whose purpose is to sabotage your efforts to do anything that would make your life better.

The chatterbox keeps me logged out and riding the carousel as long as I listen to it. Some people listen to it for years and wonder why their lives are the same year after year.

Cutting the Power

The antidote to overthinking is being present. It’s having a moment-to-moment awareness of what’s happening around you and not getting caught up in your thoughts.

How can you decrease overthinking and increase your presence?

Breathe

Do you pay attention to your breathing?

Deep, slow breathing decreases anxiety, calms your mind, and centers your attention. But the first thing most people do when they’re anxious or their mind is riding on the carousel is to stop breathing. Breath becomes very shallow, or sometimes they don’t breathe at all!

How often do you breathe intentionally?

Focusing all your attention on taking deep breaths, even for just a few seconds, brings you back into the present. You can hit the mute button on the chatterbox and choose what you’re going to think about by redirecting your anxious thoughts toward something more empowering.

Say it Out Loud

Have you ever convinced yourself of something in your head, only to hear how ridiculous it sounds when you say it out loud?

It’s at that moment you think: It sounded a lot better in my head.

Ever been there?

When I realize I’m overthinking something, I tell myself to stop, and I say what I’m overthinking about out loud. This way I can hear it and decide if what I’m thinking makes sense.

When you’re in your head you believe all your own thoughts, whether they’re true or not.

Saying out loud what’s in your head forces you to articulate your thoughts in simple terms because you can’t possibly say everything you’re thinking.

Decide

Apply for the job. Or don’t. Accept the offer. Or don’t. Ask for a date. Or don’t. Move to New York. Or don’t. Order the chicken. Or don’t.

Just decide.

I’m not advocating decision making without first weighing the consequences. Our decisions do matter, but most of the stuff you waffle back and forth over isn’t life or death. There are only a few life decisions that can’t be reversed or changed at a later time.

The act of making a decision gets you out of your head because it forces you to take action.

Most small decisions–if they’re wrong–can be corrected later. Yes, you might make a mess of things for a little while, but it’s better to be wrong and know than stuck on the carousel forever.

Final Thoughts

Overthinking doesn’t solve anything although you might feel like you’re working through your problems. There are only two things that will move you forward in life: thought and action. Life is hard enough as it is, don’t complicate it further by overthinking everything.