Staying on The Path to Peace and Happiness.

These simple daily practices can help us avoid regret and becoming lost in the maze of confusion…

At times, maybe through anger or frustration, we can lose not only our way but also ourselves. When we react badly to something it leads us to feelings of shame, remorse and even guilt. Once we’ve said or done something in haste it can’t be changed. We then go over and over it in our heads, throw out all the good qualities we believed we had and become lost in the maze of confusion.

The basis of this confusion is our ignorance in not knowing the truth about the causes of suffering. The result is that we will beat ourselves up mentally for hours, even days, until such time as we feel able to forgive ourselves, move on and resolve to do better the next time round.

“Our life is a series of lessons such as this. We are given the opportunity to learn something which we need to know and, if we don’t, it will keep happening over and over again, think Groundhog Day, until we do learn that lesson.”

The problem is always in realising ‘the lesson’ at the time it’s happening. We are usually so caught up within the spontaneity of the moment that we react and respond without giving thought or proper consideration to how we are doing it.

If we could always remember to practice ‘counting to 10' or taking a few deep breaths then maybe more of our outcomes would be positive rather than negative.

When I observe great dharma speakers talking or responding to questions, I notice that they never answer immediately. They take in the question deeply, consider it fully and only then very carefully choose the words which come out of their mouths. I also think they would often truly like to say something much different but they don’t because they have the benefit of insight and true wisdom.

They have the wisdom to fully know what the result of their wrongful speech and actions will be and also have the tremendous amount of strength required in order to save themselves from potential fallout.

So, the question really for us is, how can we learn to be more like them?

An integrated practice is clearly key in enabling us to consider and approach things from a more balanced perspective and we might start with:

* Slowing down and taking time to consider the consequences of what we say and do

* Training the mind to be more calm will establish a firmer base in wisdom

* Developing an awareness of the needs of others will begin to remove our ego’s desire to always come out on top

From a Buddhist perspective, these three specific practices will help keep you out of the maze of confusion and firmly on the path to peace and happiness:

1. Abandoning the self-cherishing mind (Ego)

• Make others the focus of all your actions and put their happiness above your own.

His Holiness The Dalai Lama says:

“When you dedicate yourself to others with loving kindness you get a lot more pleasure than you would otherwise. With our present, usual selfish attitude we experience very little pleasure, and what we have is easily lost.”

2. Meditation

• Sitting quietly for just 10–15 minutes each day in mindful reflection will help to create stillness in your mind and space to be in the present. Calming and training the mind regularly leads to deeper understanding and wisdom and provides a firm, secure base from which we can operate

3. Practising Generosity and Loving Kindness

• Giving, not just your money, but also your time and really listening to others whilst opening your heart to share love and joy with everyone you meet; especially those people who may be the cause of your anger and frustration; are key to releasing the hold which the ego has over us. Simply and silently wishing others to ‘be well and happy’ will lift your spirits and quickly restore your equilibrium

These are all simple practices which can be carried out each day. By being increasingly mindful in this way, you will be less inclined to rise to any tempting bait, which means you will have nothing to regret. This will keep you out of the maze of confusion and firmly on the path to liberation and inner peace.

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