Standing Out.

Why I chose to write; I wanted to become a lawyer, and then an Ambassador, and then I just decided to write.

I volunteered as a Community Manager, but after the interview, I was asked to work as a Content Editor. I was going to be writing articles for them. To be honest, it sounded like some kind of a joke, because even though I had been writing for as long as I could remember, I didn’t think that I was good enough to create a career out of writing. I was going to say that I couldn’t, but the encouragement I received from my “to be” boss gave me so much courage so, I decided to try it.

I’m an English native speaker who grew up in a home of readers and writers. Our toys as kids were mostly children books, and we had shelves filled with books from when our parents were still single. My Mum was an English teacher, so it was only normal that we had to be good English speakers; My Engineer and Architect brothers would hold a fair match with an English Language Major student. At 12, I already wrote about 3 children books, with illustrations and cover pages. Everybody reads and writes in my family.

I’ve always been a big dreamer, so when it was time to pick a career, I definitely looked big, going for things that I thought were going to give me that accomplished feeling everyone is probably looking for. English was my favourite subject, but whenever someone asked me why I wasn’t studying English Language, I just laughed it off. I couldn’t even imagine studying it, like who wants to be an English Language teacher? (How is this even a bad thing again?)

Anyway, I spent my teenage age studying Law, and every other thing I thought was cool to study. I didn’t fail though, but I was just like every other person. I burned the midnight candles, spent time in Libraries and joined study groups. I did everything I could for good grades, and it wasn’t easy. I remember a conversation I had with a friend that sunk into me. I’d asked him to help me prepare for exams and after the exams, he asked if our study helped and sincerely speaking, it really did. I told him about how he had saved my life, but he stopped me and said

“you know, you’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met. The problem is that you were just bored. This isn’t you”.

I was studying International Relations and Diplomacy at that time, and trying to fulfill my dream of becoming an Ambassador. It was a lot of politics and Economics and Political economics; You get the point. I was literaly bored to death. I had no idea what I was doing there, or why I even had to become an Ambassador. I was struggling with school, but I was doing very well though, I was around a 4.0/5.0 grade, but there were others that did even better. I had friends who were around a 4.7, or 4.8 /5.0. They were the ones that stood out obviously. Where they smart? Probably, did they burn midnight candles? Maybe, but what were they doing differently, that I wasn’t doing?

Let’s fast forwad to today. I’m finally a language student, and English Language is my main Language, together with other languages like German and Spanish. I attend a French University, were 99% of my classmates are French native speakers learning English as their second Language. I’m not a serious student, because like you would imagine, I’m not that young anymore, and if it wasn’t for circumstances, I’ll definitely not be doing this, and especially at this age. There’s one thing I noticed though, My English grades never go below 15/20. If you understand the French system, you’ll know that 13/20 is the pass mark. You can only get up to 17, if you’re a guru, and 99% of the time, that’s what I get, and in exams were I just literally show up.

You cannot show up for an exam you have no idea about, and expect good grades, or expect to do well at work, if you don’t know what you’re doing. People that do well in exams don’t have an extra brain, and people that excel at work are not some kind of Aliens. They just know how to do what they’re doing. (Just so you know, knowing how to study or learn is actually a thing) It’s the same for everything.

As a writer, you cannot just pick up a pen and a paper and begin to write, or decide to write about things you barely know, or speak about. If you’re not able to explain what you think you know to someone else, and make them understand it, then you cannot say that you understand that subject, or topic, and if you cannot express what you know in written words, so someone can read it and understand it, then you cannot say that you know how to write.

You cannot honestly compare me to my young French classmates, because as an English native speaker, English Language is something I know. I’ve been reading and writing books from the moment I could recognize the Alphabets. I even finished reading Shakespeare’s complete works at 16. I mean all of his stories, and I read them in the old English Language. I am not an ordiniary English Native Speaker, which would still in a way be unfair to these kids, but being who I am, just makes the situation worse.

I remember speaking with my friend when I started my new journey as a language student, and after staring at me for a long time, he laughed and said “you finally did it”. I did what? “You found your place”. I was literally glowing with excitement, as I explained my journey to him. I was finally accepting who I was, a language lover, a reader and a writer.

My English teachers think I’m very serious at school. They see my grades and there’s this conclusion that I definitely put in the efforts needed. My classmates are probably jealous of my grades and want to partner up with me for English projects. Today, I’ve become my friend. I’m that person people go to for help. What changed? I’m doing what I know how to do. This isn’t something that happened overnight. I’m in a perfect situation, and in the perfect time.

I picked a phrase in the Indian movie “3 idiots” that says “Make passion your profession, so that work will be play”.

People tell you that it’s not always practical to do what you love doing, or to make your passion your profession. True, sometimes you have to do other things because of your situation, but at least do what you know how to do.

Everybody can do something. Everybody grew up with a skill or an ability that they have experience in, from the time they were born. These might be things we take for granted, things we cannot even imagine a career from. We might even look down on these things, but the reality still remains that it’s only with practice that we can gain perfection. Calculate how many hours of practice you’ve had through out your childhood until now, doing that thing that you know how to do and see if perfection is really that far. You just need to learn how to earn from it.

I’ve always been afraid to share what I write, but someone was able to see my ability in writing, and encourage me into it. Today, I’ve realized that writing is something I know how to do, not because of the qualified studies I received, but because of my rich experiences and practices. I write about things that I know, and I write in the way that I know how to express myself. Speaking has never been my thing, except when I’m with my family, but expressing myself in written words is something I’ve always done, and will always do, so I decided I was going to try earning from it.