GROUNDHOG DAY
Spring Will Come Early This Year, or Not
Whether it’s Punxatawney Phil, Scramble the duck, or an inanimate object making the prediction, it’s a crap shoot

According to our fearless Featherstone, a stuffed flamingo that can’t stand on its own, spring is right around the corner. Featherstone, by the way, is named for Donald Featherstone, who designed the pink plastic flamingo in 1957 in Leominster, Mass.
Meanwhile, in Eastford, Conn., and Punxatawney, Penn., predictions call for six more winter weeks. Fuckers.
Phil’s been around a while, predicting long winters or early springs at Gobbler’s Knob since 1887.
And he’s batting around .400, which isn’t bad if he’s playing baseball. He ain’t. I dare say he’s been no better than modern-day meteorologists who predict snow amounts when storms are headed our way.
I’ll grant that weather prediction isn’t easy these days, with climate change biting us in the ass. But that’s why they’re getting paid. Phil, on the other hand, or at least a relative, has a movie credit with Bill Murray in 1993’s “GroundHog Day.”
Here in Leominster, we have a stuffed Flamingo that cannot stand but predicts the weather. Sounds right. We also have a mayor, Dean Mazzarella, who wears shorts and a coat of many colors, ala Joseph, each Feb. 2.


A friend commented on the photos I posted on Facebook, saying she didn’t know what to make of Dean, who likes to have fun. But Deano has a serious side. He takes care of this city like it’s his child. One of the more significant problems Massachusetts has, as do many other states, is having an underfunded pension plan. But not Leominster. Last year, it became the first community in the state to have a full-funded pension plan.
Getting back on track here, our tiny city in central Massachusetts had a turnout of about 30 people who braved the cold to learn winter’s fate this year. Punxatawney had a somewhat larger crowd, with about 40,000 people turning out for the annual weather prediction.
At least we had a lot less traffic this morning.
While Punxatawney has realized a financial boon during the course of Phil’s prognostications, it is more of a party atmosphere for residents and visitors. While there’s no money to be made in Leominster, for people who show up in person or watch it on Dean’s live stream on Facebook, the morning offers joy on an otherwise cold February morning.
And if you read the news every morning as I do, we can all use something to put a smile on our faces.

I hope this story and photos help readers smile, even for just a few minutes. Cheers!
If you’ve read this far, thank you for stopping by. Lay 50 claps on me and comment if you would please. I will return the favor. Cheers!
I accept tips, which go directly to Dining for Hunger, a recognized 501(c)(3) organization that looks to end food insecurity. If you can spare a dollar or two, I’d be grateful.
More stories from Bruce Coulter.






