Inner Peace, Mindful

Some Formulas to Find Out Your Inner Peace

You will find the answer to the difference between happiness and peace

“Never be in a hurry; do everything quietly and in a calm spirit. Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset.” — Saint Francis de Sales

At first, the title of this article was “Simple formula” but I was shocked because the discussion about inner peace is more complex than it seems. For me personally, inner peace goes hand in hand with knowing myself. The more I know myself and my needs, the greater the level of inner peace within me. But like I said at the start, it’s still more complex than it looks. Especially when it comes to feelings that are never stable and very easy to change. But from the long journey that I’ve been through, I know one thing for sure inner peace will not form overnight. Just like when we take care of plants, it takes patience and battle with insecurities until eventually the moment when we feel we have had enough begins to emerge.

Inner peace is a result that is in the form of a noun instead of a verb. You can’t control the results, but you can control what you do. So focus on improving what you can control. Some of the things below might be able to help you to find the way to your inner peace

You Need to Give up with These Things

In life, there is something that is worth to effort, and there is something really wasting time to putting a lot of energy into. I suggest that you give up on the following things, otherwise you will tire out meaninglessly.

1. Involving toxic people

Someone with a completely different energy level from yours may be toxic in some cases. Don’t force engaging with them, especially if you don’t need to be involved in essential matters such as work. Getaway, because not everyone is made to fits you.

2. Try to change others' minds and behavior

Someone might change for the better well that’s true. But it is not your responsibility but theirs. Don’t be naive and think you can be a hero to be able to change someone. You may be able to play the role of one that influences them to change, but the changes that come from them are still their own.

3. Trying to impress people

It’s a cliché but sometimes you can’t just brush it off, especially if the path you choose is the opposite of most people. Remember, right and wrong in this life really can’t be interpreted only between black and white. There is a lot of color spectrum in the middle, and we don’t even know what color mixtures make it up. There is no absolute right or wrong in this world, there is only right or wrong for someone whose answer really depends.

4. Persuing perfection

You can never be perfect, no matter how hard you try to do so. The word perfect is really biased be interpreted because every good thing is accompanied by a bad thing. Instead, try to be a better version of everything you are doing. Because there is always room for improvement.

5. Revenge

The best revenge is to be a better version of yourself. Trust me this is a way of revenge that you will never regret. You may have been completely irritated with someone, but let the universe take care of it. Your job is to focus on yourself.

6. Dissolved with past mistake

Everyone must have made mistakes. But don’t think of it as a steady ugliness. It’s just a part for you to learn. To shape your character. So, learn to forgive yourself and move on.

What you Need to Learn

Here’s a good thing for you to learn to do. Here I use the word “learn” not “must” because I know some of them are not easy.

1. Forgive

There are some mistakes that can never be made up for with an apology. Especially for wounds that produce trauma. The opportunity is wasted leading to long regrets. I can’t deny it took a long time to heal and deal with this kind of thing. There is almost nothing that can be done for this other than accepting the feelings that arise and affirming these are things for us to grow. A scenario like this makes us realize how much we have to pay to find ourselves. That’s how expensive the price that we have to sacrifice to be the best version of ourselves.

2. Curiosity

The starting zone is usually the most uncomfortable phase but also the most existing part at the same time. A feeling that triggers an adrenaline rush to know more but also a lot of fear at the same time. As time goes by, we know more until we start to feel quite capable in the field we live in. Until we are in a comfort zone where we can do our jobs without any more pressure. But this zone is the dangerous one, because sometimes in this zone we stop learning and improving. However, as I said earlier, there is always room for improvement. Maintaining curiosity is also not that easy. Unless there is a sense of wanting to continue learning within ourselves. Know that there is a diamond in you that you need to heat to a high temperature for it to emerge.

3. Being a best friend for yourself

We are often good at entertaining others but so mean to ourselves. Whether it’s because the expectations are too high for ourselves until it’s finally more difficult to appreciate. Maybe we often forget that we are the only ones who will be with us forever. Friends come and go one after another. Parents are not always with us. Our spouses may separate or die first. Even if they are physical with us for a long time, they may not necessarily be present personally and emotionally. We are the ones who should be our own true friends and try to empathize as we empathize with others.

4. Being true and responsible

No matter how much we feel that our life is unfair, we are still who should take responsibility for ourselves. Never expect life to be fair, it’s never. There is a privilege that we cannot beat. There is luck that we cannot intervene. There are many unseen things we don’t know. But still, fight for yourself. Nobody would be gonna do but you. Fight for yourself what makes you happy. Fight for your dream. Fight for your rights. It’s okay to ask for help if you need it. But don’t expect much from other people. Again, your life is your responsibility.

5. Let it go

Letting go of certain things can open the door to true contentment in life. Believe that something will be given from everything that is taken. Believe that there is always something that comes from everything that goes. That’s the law. It’s just that sometimes we are impatient and force to find the answer now. Don’t hold on to something too tightly, because maybe you’ll get hurt and you won’t even be able to see its beauty.

6. Slow down

The era of technology makes us even more rushed in life. Whether it’s because of social media that unconsciously makes us keep comparing. Or because of the ease of access to technology that makes life demands us to be faster too. In fact, there are many things that you can see more of when you go slower. There are many things you can be grateful for along your journey towards your dream. There are many meaningful things that you may not see when you are in a hurry. Learn to distinguish between fast and haste. It’s okay if you want to be fast but don’t be in a hurry. Prepare your steps carefully so that your foundation is not fragile.

What You Can Do :

Unlike the previous point, the following is quite easy to do as long as you have the intention. The following things can be a trigger to give you peace. Although it still has to be balanced with other things too.

1. Spending time in nature

Spending time in nature can help relieve anxiety and stress. Besides that, you can also be fresher, especially for those of you who spend a lot of time in front of the laptop on weekdays.

2. Meditation

Research shows that meditating at least 15 minutes a day helps improve focus and makes you more mindful of the present. There are many types of meditation that you can choose from. Stop for a moment for reflection

3. Outdoor Activity

If you live in the middle of the city and quite far from nature, at least take time out to meet the sun. Looking at distant objects can help relax your eyes. In addition, vitamin D from sunlight also stimulates the formation of the hormone serotonin which keeps us in a good mood and stays fresh.

4. Declutter

Having less can make you feel more spacious. I myself have been routinely decluttering since I graduated from college at least once every 6 months. Get rid of the things that are less important in your life, so you can use your time for things that really matter to you.

5. Journaling

When I was seriously depressed, I did online counseling. Then the psychologist asked me to rate the feelings I feel on a scale of 1–10. In addition, I was also asked to write down at least 5 things I was grateful for that day. At that time I felt there was nothing good anymore that I have but it turns out I was wrong. I did regular journaling for 2 weeks at that time and I feel so much better emotionally.

Bottom Line

Happiness and peace actually are different things. Happiness is a moment once we got what we hope while peace is a willingness to accept whether the condition is good or bad. Maybe you haven’t found what makes you happy today. But you can still feel at peace and content with your current situation. Some of the methods above may not work for you. However, everyone has their own way to find their inner peace. Go ahead and find your own way.

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