Eight Desert Island Songs Challenge
Seven Days of Survival Through Songs
A song a day or you die…
Challenged accepted Michael L Butler. I went a bit off script. Hope you enjoy!
This is absolutely, positively a true and accurate account of a fictional event.
I awoke face first in the white sand.
The blistering sun beat down on my pale, scrawny, half-naked body (which half, you’ll never know).
My head was pounding.
Sand is lodged in every orifice for extra friction.
How did I get here to this beautiful, torturous destination?
Who are these strangers strumming ukuleles?
Am I dead? Are they angels?
What I do know is that I need to figure out how I am going to survive.
Beside me in the sand are two bottles of water, four Vegemite sandwiches and a magical Discman (yep, a Discman, remember those?).
There are no discs or batteries, and across the lid is a sticker that reads:
Think of a song a day to survive.
Though alone on a tropical island and potentially about to die, I took in the beauty.
The fresh sea air, the sun, the surf…
As though on a breeze, I hear the whispering of a song.
Aruba, Jamaica, ooh, I wanna take ya
Bermuda, Bahama, come on, pretty mama
Key Largo, Montego,
baby, why don’t we go,
Jamaica
NO! I shook it free from my mind. No Beach Boys allowed. What am I trying to do, torture myself to death?
This isn’t a holiday. This isn’t Kokomo…wait…is this Kokomo? Where’s John Stamos?
Day One
I look around the deserted island. There is nothing for miles.
Maybe the ukulele players can help me?
As I turn to ask for help, they are walking away in the distance.
Bastards. How can they abandon me with nothing but Vegemite sandwiches (vomit) and an archaic musical device?
Wait. Did they just vanish? I rub my eyes.
Argh! F*cking sand!
I’m all alone on a deserted island. Think, Pooh. Think!
Instead of panicking, I decide to take stock and remember who I am.
I’m a Survivor.
Day Two
I made it through the cold night by wrapping myself in coconut leaves, thanks to the multitude of coconut trees, and covered up that naked half (wink!)
Good to know that if I run out of sandwiches, I can shimmy up the shaft and grab some nuts.
I've decided to ration the disgusting food options and only sip my water.
I have no idea how long I'm going to be here.
I haven't seen a plane or a boat at all so far.
I’ve walked up and down the beach. Not a soul.
Day two hasn't been too bad though, and I'm still keeping a positive attitude.
As I watch the sunset over the ocean, I think of my next song.
One of my all-time favourite bands, Powderfinger and their song "Sunsets."
Day Three
I heard some strange animal sounds in the jungle last night. I think they were mating sounds. Made me miss my husband. I wonder if he’s looking for me?
I’ve been awake since…who the f*ck knows. I don’t have a phone, and the Discman doesn’t have a clock.
There’s a storm brewing in the South…ah wait…East? No, North…sh*t…somewhere in the sky. I’m so going to die. Poet didn’t even know it.
The sun is going down, and the air is getting cold.
A strong wind whips through the coconut trees.
Thunder cracks across the dark sky.
Argh, Thunder.
Then lightning.
Argh, lightning.
Thunder.
Lightning.
Then thunder…you get it.
I need a song to get my blood moving. I need to keep warm. A song to keep me dancing through the night if I want any chance of being alive in the morning.
Once “Booty Swing” by Parov Stelar is in my head, I can’t stop.
Day Four
I made it through the night. I’m Alive!
If it wasn’t for my other all-time favourite band, there wouldn’t be a song more fitting.
Well, there might be, but their song is actually called “Alive”. So I’m going with it.
I have prayed and wished this whole time for a miracle. But Eddie Vedder (90s version) still hasn’t turned up.
Call yourself a magical Discman!? Unbelievable.
Day Five
So much time to reflect and try not to die on a tropical island like a loser.
Since the useless ukulele devils left me for dead, I haven’t seen another human.
Doubt and despair is kicking in.
How can a human just leave another human to die? What is wrong with humanity?
The Shins “So Says I” answers some of my questions…
Because it was nothing like we’d ever dreamt Our lust for life had gone away with the rent we hated And because it made no money nobody saved no one’s life.
…we’re all a bunch of a**holes!
Day Six
One vegemite sandwich and one bottle of water left.
I’m so bored. I wish I had a volleyball with Tom Hank’s bloody handprint to keep me company. I’d call it Gary.
I’m starting to hallucinate. I think I’m already going crazy.
Though I was half crazy before I first found myself in the sand, it hasn’t taken much to get me to full crazy.
Day Seven
A monkey just stole my last piece of food and knocked over my water.
I don’t have the energy to grab nuts. Any nuts.
SOS! HELP! ARGH!
No food. No water. No Gary. No more time.
Run.
Just keep running. Sort of like Dory but on land.
I run through the dunes. I run through the jungle.
I don’t know where I was running.
I just couldn’t stay there any longer.
Waiting to die.
I run until my legs can’t run anymore.
Breaking through the trees. I collapse onto lawn.
Lawn?!
What’s that sound?
Clinking? Splashing? Laughing?
Ukuleles?
Is this a resort? Has this been here all this time?
“PJ?!”
I stumble to my feet. Wearing nothing but my leaf-wrap dress. Half is missing (you’ll never know).
My husband is running toward me.
He’s wearing a hideous Hawaiian t-shirt and a colourful lei around his neck.
“Where have you been?”
“Where have you been?” I snap back.
“The last time I saw you, you were sculling island ice teas and doing cartwheels on the beach.”
He screws up his nose.
“What is that stench?”
“That’s the scent of seven days of survival through songs. Mother f*cker!”
“But you’ve only been gone seven hours,” he says.
WTF?!
I had so much fun writing this “true” story. I choose : Daniella Montage, Gabby Gabs, Lisa Wrench, Kammie Sumpter, Taylor Davidson, Liz Mroz, Jane Kelley to take on the eight desert island songs challenge.
Tagging those who I think have already been challenged but might be interested: Scot Butwell, The Sober Vegan Yogi, Leonard Tillerman
Follow, Subscribe and Dance.
Another story that you may like:
Read Michael’s playlist here: