Distributed to Work

Are You Being Harassed in the Workplace? You Have Options!

How to approach an uncomfortable situation with integrity

Right up front, I want to make it clear I am not an attorney, and nothing that follows is intended to be construed as legal advice. The matters discussed in this article can be complex and you should seek the advice of a competent professional before taking any kind of action.

With that being said, let’s begin . . .

All employees deserve the right to earn a livelihood in a non-threatening and safe environment

And most companies — especially larger ones — go to great lengths to protect workers from the intentional actions, conversation, and innuendo from other employees that results in embarrassment, fear, anxiety, or induces negativity into the work environment.

But despite a company’s best efforts to increase awareness, educate, and warn their workforce, incidents still happen — sometimes by accident and other times by design or intention.

Bringing formal legal action against your employer to correct a difficult situation or problem at work should always be considered a last resort. So how do you know when it’s time to call an attorney?

First, look at the situation as objectively as possible

Pursuing damages over a misunderstanding or unintentional blunder by management — especially if it’s a one-time event and an apology follows — is seldom a good move in the long-term.

Clarify — if only to yourself — what your real motivations are. Is this an emotional vendetta to settle a grudge? Or are you facing an ongoing problem that continues to persist in spite of your best efforts to bring it to the attention of a supervisor?

Always keep in mind that issues based on management’s decisions about promotions, raises, assignments, transfers, and relocations are seldom actionable. Don’t confuse the ongoing business decisions of the company for discrimination or as grounds for wrongful termination. In many cases, it’s not personal — it’s business.

Harassment comes in two general forms:

• Discrimination, in which an employee is subjected to verbal comments or physical actions predicated on their religion, race, sex, age, sexual orientation, and other protected classes. Harassment can include unwanted physical contact, sexual innuendo, coercion, threats, or intimidation.
• A deliberate campaign waged by management to motivate an employee to quit, or the gathering of “evidence” to substantiate termination. In this situation, the goal is to remove the employee while mitigating the liability of a wrongful termination lawsuit. This is often referred to as being “managed out.”

There’s always the possibility of being the target of harassment or some form of discrimination

And regardless of your rights as defined by law, from the standpoint of keeping your job, making a legal claim of any kind against the company usually means the kiss of death to your career.

With that kind of risk, moving forward with a formal complaint is a decision you should not make alone. Discuss your options with someone you trust — your spouse, a close friend who can keep their mouth shut, or a family member with a comparable professional background to yours. Always factor in the advice from an attorney, and then decide the best way of dealing with the problem.

Obviously, a large part of deciding what to do and when to do it is based on the severity of the infraction. If the negative event(s) has robbed you of any desire to stay a single day longer with your current employer, then your options are clear.

However, if you want to preserve the relationship, try approaching the source of the problem privately with your supervisor. Start by saying how much you like your job, and you want to clear up a situation that’s bothering you. Explain your position, how the behavior makes you feel, and ask for the behavior or situation to be changed or eliminated. End the conversation by expressing your appreciation for her consideration and your promise that your conversation will remain private.

Here’s a suggested order of actions to handle a personal grievance:

1. Document each time the event happens. Write down the date, the time, the names of the individuals involved, and include any witnesses and a description of what happened. Keep this in a notebook AT HOME. Never leave any derogatory or damaging evidence at the office, and never reveal to anyone that you have it.
2. Document any actions, communications, or face-to-face meetings you have to resolve the issue, regardless of whether it’s with a co-worker or supervisor. Include the details of how long the meeting or conversation lasted, what was discussed, and what was decided, proposed, or resolved.
3. Run your situation by an attorney. This creates a third-party confirmation of the problem at the time it takes place. It also establishes a verifiable, contemporaneous record of the situation and its impact on you — an effective tool if you need to take legal action. This can also be important in meeting any statute of limitations when filing a formal complaint or lawsuit.

I want to stress that these situations can be complicated and may originate from an intentional plan to terminate or the personal agenda of a superior — motivations that you’re unaware of. Just keep in mind there’s a time to try to negotiate, and a time to lower the boom on prejudice and extortion.

I’ll move on from this rather ugly topic with this:

Being able to settle, manage, or otherwise successfully negotiate problems is what management expects from their best and brightest. From the company’s mindset, airing their dirty laundry in public is de-facto proof you’re not senior management material.

Conversely, there’s going to be a few bad apples in every workplace, and if push comes to shove, it may be your place to confront them and, if necessary, take legal action against the organization to stop the abusive behavior.

If you feel conflicted about which road to take

Ask yourself how you’ll feel about yourself and your situation in six months from now — if you do nothing

The difference between compromise and sacrifice may be difficult to recognize during the heat of conflict. But your outcome will generally be more satisfying in the long-term if you consider your self-respect among your most valuable — and non-negotiable — assets.

© 2020 Roger Reid. All Rights Reserved.

Find more tips & strategies for personal and career success in Better Mondays

Roger A. Reid, Ph.D. is the founder|host of Success Point 360 Podcast and author of Better Mondays: The New Rules for Creating Financial Success and Personal Freedom (While Working for the Man) and A certified NLP trainer with degrees in engineering and business, Roger offers tips and strategies for achieving higher levels of career success and personal fulfillment in the real world.