Upsetting The Applecart Idea #9
Idea 9 (A Prequel To Idea 8)
Writing Prompt From ██ ███████
Idea 9
Write the start of a humour or espionage story where a community of creative writers decide to take over Medium. What do they do, and what do they want?
In the headquarters of The Writers And Tale Tellers Society (T.W.A.T.T.S.), sitting around an extremely large table, a group of disparate, desperate, creative writers are considering their next move. At the head of the table is Mega Mind, elbows on the table, the fingertips of splayed hands touching each other, looking like a spider standing on a mirror, regards the renegade bunch. Sitting around the table were TWATT enforcer, Annie Trevaskis, and her sidekick Smillew. Krystal, May More and Belcairn ( the logistics team). Christina Cattai, Raine Lore, and Rachel A Fefer (elite assassination squad). Henrik Stahl (Scandinavian TWATT and technology consultant), and last but not least Elle McIntosh (undercover Femme Fatale).
“You fucked up Grimsby!” A visibly angry Mega Mind shouted.
“How did I fuck up? It wasn’t my fault, Sassy went crackers.”
“I don’t know how you fucked up, you haven’t written that part of the story yet.”
“Oh right, err yeah. Am I dreaming right now?”
“No, we have a big problem to sort out and that’s why you are all here. I’m going to leave you now as I need to eat some raw shallots and have a nap. Annie will brief you all and bring you up to date.”
Mega Mind, stood up gracefully and seemed to drift out of the room.
Annie Trevaskis walked to the wall at the end of the room and pulled down a projector screen and picked up a pointing stick. “ Smillew,” she said. Smillew, at the other end of the table, switched on the projector and opened a PowerPoint presentation. The title screen had one single message on it.
Grimsby burst out laughing. “What the fuck is that?”
“It’s the title of our plan to close down Medium and all the writing platforms in the world,” Annie replied.
“Which fucking idiot came up with that? I mean it’s comic sans for fucks sake!”
Smillew’s head went down and a single tear rolled down his cheek and dripped on the table.
“Now look what you’ve done, you utter cunt.” Krystal shouted at Grimsby, “You’ve made him cry, he’s been working on that for weeks.”
May More leaned across the table and handed Smillew a tissue. He sniffled into it like a fucking snivelling crybaby . “Take no notice of him Smillew, he’s just a wanker.”
“Woah, hang on,” Grimsby protested, “Why am I public enemy №1 all of a sudden?”
“Everybody fucking hates you because you’re such a dickhead,” Raine Lore observed, “Annie had to stop Sylvia this morning. She turned up with a baseball bat, intent on making you suffer.”
“Ja Ja, she vas very angvy vit du.” Henrik Stahl confirmed.
“ENOUGH!” Annie shouted, “We have to get through this presentation and finalise our plan to close down Medium.”
“Why do we need to close it down, Annie?” Grimsby asked.
“So that we can restart it with us, the TWATTS in charge. Then we can rid ourselves of all the bots, crypto wankers, life hack/well-being shit and memoirists.”
“Fair enough, so what do we have to do?”
Everybody turned to look at Grimsby Hackney. He suddenly went cold as he started to realise what it was they wanted him to do.
“I I I c c can’t do that.” His voice quivered, “I haven’t interacted with him for ages. I fear the consequences. Have any of you got the faintest idea of what it’s like to get that in your inbox after such an incredibly long time? Do any of you know the horror you’re asking me to commit to a fellow writer?”
“Oh yes, we know exactly what it’s like,” purred a strangely alluring Elle McIntosh, “Which is why that is absolutely what we want you to do.”
“Even though it could bring about the end of Medium?” Grimsby asked Elle.
“Yes,” she hissed, “It’s because we know it will bring about the end of Medium.”
Grimsby stared back at the screen, wide-eyed, sweating, straining in his chair as though trying to get away. He could see it now. In his imagination, the solid blocks started to break apart to form strange shapes, moving around, out of focus, slowly, ever so slowly coming into focus. Yes, he could see it now.
“OPERATION TAG JF DANSKIN”
Grimsby was now writhing in his seat. “What have I done? Oh God help me, what have I done?”
Grimsby slipped into unconsciousness.