A Dream Saved Me From Death

Indeed! That Dream Was My Creator’s Mercy

2014

On a new year eve, I had unusual blood spotting, unusual because it had never happened before, unusual because it was not supposed to happen fifteen days after a regular crimson tide, unusual because bleeding was an uninvited, unexpected guest when the most loved and the most expected teeny weeny ovum was arriving.

What is wrong? Am I pregnant? Can that be implantation bleeding? My creative mind started to imagine, implanting seeds of hope in a newly wed woman’s heart. But soon, my cognitive mind slammed it shut, yelling, “Damn fool! How is it possible when the uterine wall already sloughed off giving up all hopes and, crashing dreams?” That made sense.

I was clueless and confused but never felt alarming.

I went to sleep as I would on any other night, but yeah, I would wake up on a new year for a new beginning…

2015

A fair old man in white suit tells me in a serious tone, “ Hey you! go right away to a gynecologist”

A dream, vivid as hell, so much so I woke up startled gasping if the old man is near and real.

I checked my clock, it was around 3 am.

How can I ignore such a vivid dream on the first morning of year 2015 considering the unusual happening in the last eve of year 2014?

The dream indeed made me feel uncomfortable. I remember I made a quick supplication to my creator for my and my dear ones’ safety and happiness. I as a Muslim believe, the last part of the night is blessed and prayers\supplications are more recommended.

Our Lord, descends (in a manner befitting His Majesty) to the nearest heaven to us of this universe during the last third of the night and says: ‘Is there anyone to call upon Me so that I shall respond to him (fulfill his prayer). Is there anyone to ask of Me that I may grant his request. Is there anyone to seek My forgiveness so that I shall pardon him (and forgive his sins)’.” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

I was lying on bed pondering over my dream. Why was there a mention of g y n e c o l o g i s t? Was that my imaginations and expectations all came together in form of a dream?

I didn’t want to wake-up my loving partner, after all what would I tell? Hey! Got a dream, come on, take me to gynecologist at this wee hour?

My bladder full by then was screaming, “nature’s call”.

I didn’t hurry to loo but my wardrobe, and was frantically searching for the pregnancy urine test kit.

Perhaps! The impact of the dream? I know not but a thin light of hope was still hanging overhead.

For my heart then, Gynecologist meant pregnancy and my bundle of joy.

I decided to test for my pregnancy ignoring my cognitive reasoning or any logic whatsoever. I had a stock of test kit at home. Perhaps, every woman hoping to be a mother would have it. Just in case…

I found the kit and I knew exactly what to do with it.

Do you know how to test for pregnancy at home? NO? Never mind, here is my funny poetry guidance —

My heart was thumping and jumping inside my chest. It was the first time I was gonna use the kit for I never had the opportunity or necessity to use it. I was not sure how it works, but yes there was a instruction manual that guided. Unfortunately, no mug or jug came along with the kit to store priceless drops of pee. I went all around my home and kinda managed to bring the container which I thought was perfect.

Process went on well, got the precious sample., Taking a deep breath, placed drops of urine on test region.,

My jaws dropped n shock, tears streamed down my cheeks in joy when I saw pink glowing line triple the thickness of control line.

Result: Damn positive for pregnancy

I can’t explain in words the boundless happiness I felt. I was crying like a baby in joy.

How can I not wake-up my soul partner?

Imagine, waking him up at wee hour, crying and screaming, “I am pregnant.”

His reactions were priceless, I can’t describe in words.

Our first baby was to be born in next four-lac-three-thousand-two-hundred-minute, oh yeah, nine months, how can we really express the emotions in words?

Anyone who had been there would know, how it really feels.

And what gift could be more special than this on the early morning of new year?

You may wonder — How come the dream saved my life?

We didn’t yet get to the climax.

How My Dream Saved My Life

In the working hours of the new year, we made an appointment with a gynecologist as the old man in white suggested to meet right away and of course we were excited to see our tiny world evolving in my womb.

Looking at the test strip, my doc was excited as well for the line was too thick suggesting the fetus would be few weeks old. She immediately took me for ultra-sound scanning.

Finally that precious moment had arrived.

Normally the monitor that would show the fetus just in a jiffy took longer than necessary. My doc looked bewildered, she was searching for the fetus as though looking for a lost ring in the vast desert sand.

where are you, my honey? are you playing hide and seek with mommy?

Doc asked so many questions, tell me your right age, is your cycles regular, are you under birth control, are you under fertility treatment, does any of your family members have genetic disorders, on and on…

I started feeling uncomfortable, fear and anxiety soon had overcome my joy.

Alarm was turned on in my brain. I knew, something was not right.

I recalled the dream again while my doc was still searching for her lost ring.

The old man didn’t smile nor was he polite when he said, go right away… There was urgency in his voice. Emergency! Run,run, run…

Doc found her lost ring…

Alright! Straight to the point, no more suspense.

My doc finally discovered my darling fetus in the fallopian or uterine tube. In fact, I went through three more scans in well-reputed hospital by senior and experienced radiologists just to confirm the location. All had tough time discovering the tiny one. Maybe because they wanted to be sure before proceeding for necessary action.The blood report showed over 3000 miU/ml, I don’t really remember the exact value. With that high value, obviously, I was pregnant, must have been four-week old.

Hence, my first pregnancy was found to be ectopic or tubal. This means the tissue (I won’t refer as fetus, you may understand why as you read) was growing inside a narrow uterine tube instead of the elastic sac or uterine cavity where it would have enough space to twist and turn, grow and kick your belly dishoom dishoom…

The noteworthy point is — Ectopic pregnancy can be fatal.

With the growth of this abnormal tissue, the uterine tube may rupture and cause life-threatening bleeding. It’s obvious the pregnancy wouldn’t last and also can be fatal to mother. Rupture and excessive bleeding and release of contents into peritonial cavity is no child’s play, it’s damn vital, also fatal.

Woman can lose her life or at the least lose her fallopian tube reducing the pregnancy possibility rate to 50%. My dream saved both-my life and my fallopian tube.

No women with healthy reproductive cycle may take a light spotting that occurs days after their monthly periods as an alarming sign.

If I hadn’t been startled awake by my dream, what could have possibly happened?

I might have ignored spotting totally or might have just waited to see what happens, if it stops or continues, if continues then I might have considered to meet a doc. But would I have tested for pregnancy? Might be not.

Methotrexate was injected to stop the growth of tissue. I had been in critical care unit under constant monitor for a week. Blood was constantly tested for HCG levels. If levels were still increasing, I would have gone for surgery. God by his mercy saved me from that horror.

I and my tube were safe but not that tissue. Don’t judge, I am not heartless.

There was no loss of life because it was only some tissue, a group of cells dividing, no organs or heart or whatever to call it a human fetus, so I didn’t feel I lost a baby or my tiny one. All I lost was my happiness and that excitement and joy of having my little one in nine months.

One should understand, Ectopic pregnancy is an abnormal or unwanted pregnancy which undergoes natural abortion yet threatening a woman’s life. I make it clear, It’s not at all a loss of life, but more like a cell tumor whose growth must be stopped to save life.

I didn’t grieve over what happened. I knew there is always ease after every hardship.

Happy Ending

In the same year 2015, I became pregnant and my delivery was due on the last day of the year December 31, the exact day of the previous year 2014 when I went through the ordeal of abnormal pregnancy that shattered my dreams.

Year 2015 indeed began as a nightmare but ended in *dream come true*.

A happy ending.

Watch out for dreams, you sleepyhead, Some dreams are indeed from your Lord…

Chirag @ 2020

This is my Day 2 of June challenge, Thanks Sarah E Sturgis

Everyone is invited to take up June challenge by Sarah E Sturgis No word limit, no writing prompt, no specific genre, the only challenge is write every day.