My Toilets Are Clogged

Summary

The narrator is hesitant to call any plumber to fix their clogged toilets due to the fear of gossip spreading through the community.

Abstract

The narrator is dealing with a recurring problem of clogged toilets but is apprehensive about seeking help due to the potential social ramifications. Calling the local plumber would result in the story being spread around town, especially after a previous embarrassing incident at Thanksgiving. Opting for Paul, a plumber from Shorona, would lead to mockery and further gossip, exacerbated by the recent Christmas incident. George from Boysfield is considered incompetent, and his involvement would also lead to gossip. Zane from Cape Prompt would demand a detailed written account, which could lead to public embarrassment over writing errors, similar to a recent submission to Microcosm. The story is based on a prompt by Zane and also serves as an explanation for a character named Rocky's accident in the woods.

Opinions

The narrator believes that the local plumber and community members are prone to gossip, which could lead to public embarrassment.
Paul, the plumber from Shorona, is seen as someone who enjoys mocking others, particularly the local plumber.
George, the plumber from Boysfield, is perceived as lacking plumbing skills.
Zane, the plumber from Cape Prompt, is described as someone who would make the situation more complicated by demanding a written account, highlighting the narrator's concern about their writing abilities.
The narrator is self-conscious about their writing, as evidenced by their concern over typos and the reception of their latest submission to Microcosm.
The narrator is frustrated with the small-town dynamic where everyone knows each other's business.

Again

My toilets are clogged, and I can’t do anything about it. If I call the local plumber, he’ll tell his wife. She’ll repeat it to Emily during their morning coffee, and from there, it’ll spread everywhere. The whole downtown will know why my toilets got clogged, and that’s not something I’m ready to deal with, not after last Thanksgiving’s adventures.

If I call Paul, the plumber from Shorona, it will be worse. He’ll make fun of the local plumber — again. He’ll say even the neighbors don’t trust the locals to deal with crap. The local plumber will hate me — again, and she’ll tell her husband about it. He’ll repeat it to Ylime during their evening cherry, and from there, it’ll spread everywhere. The whole uptown will know why my toilets got clogged, and that’s not something I’m ready to deal with, not after last Christmas’ adventures.

If I call George, the plumber from Boysfield, it won’t work. George doesn’t know anything about plumbing. The local plumber will make fun of me — again, and he’ll tell her daughter about it. She’ll repeat it to Miley during their afternoon cocoa, and from there, it’ll spread everywhere. The whole midtown will know my toilets are clogged — again, and that’s not something I’m ready to deal with, not after last Easter’s adventures.

If I call Zane, the plumber from Cape Prompt, it will be dramatic. He’ll force me to write in great detail how my toilets got clogged. He’ll forward the email to the local plumber — again. The local plumber will edit my text — again, and she’ll tell her mother about it. She’ll repeat it to Lymie during their zany party, and from there, it’ll spread everywhere. The whole town will know I make typos, and that’s not something I’m ready to deal with, not after my latest submission to Microcosm.

How it started:

I based this story on Zane’s prompt: time to get oddly specific. It also explained Rocky’s accident in the woods. (The original title of the piece was: I Took a Shit in the Woods.)

How it ended:

It got oddly specific.

My Toilets Are Clogged

Again

Be Careful What You Don’t Wish For

Dreadman to the rescue