My Son Is Growing His Facial Hair This “Movember” To Raise Awareness of Male Suicide

And I couldn’t be more proud of him.

Male suicide rates are at a scarily all-time high.

Of the people who reach the desperate point of deciding to end their lives in the US annually, 79% are males.

It is every parent’s worst nightmare to imagine the loss of their child. For them to take their own life is unthinkable.

But for too many parents this becomes a reality.

Suicide is the second leading cause of death in the world for those aged 15–24 years.

We need to be prepared to talk about it as a global community and figure out what’s going wrong.

For far too long, we have been telling our sons and men in society at large to “man up” and “grow a pair”. It’s not funny, it’s not clever, any more than sexist remarks about women are, but we’ve become immunized by constant exposure to them over the years.

Can we stop doing that now, please?

Always keep a line of communication open

We all know how important it is to get men talking about how they really feel. You might not think you need to overtly state that you will always be there for your child/husband/partner/friend. But don’t assume that they know your love is unconditional. Make it clear.

Tell them that there is nothing, no situation they can find themselves in, that is not fixable.

Gambling debts and the impact of other addictions can often be a reason why men end their lives. It’s becoming ever easier to access online gambling, porn and recreational drugs. Alcohol abuse is on the rise. In a world full of social media lies and a virtual world of ever-increasing isolation, mental health is taking a beating.

Orin Miron, a research associate in biomedical informatics at Harvard Medical School, says that:

“Heavy social media use may also lead to fewer meaningful in-person interactions — which can protect against mental health issues and suicidal behavior — and encourage unhealthy comparison with others.”

Monitoring your children and young people on the internet is increasingly important. Ask them what they’re doing online, what they are watching and how they’re feeling about it.

Don’t turn a blind eye to any talk of death or despair from someone close to you. Even if it is framed with humor, you should take it seriously.

Suicidal ideation can quickly lead to these thoughts of hopelessness and wanting to die being acted on. Girls and women are more likely to reach out and ask for help before becoming desperate.

As a mother of sons I know that our expectations of maleness can often be overturned by reality. You can read more about these insights here:

It is our responsibility to be the change in society that enables young men in particular to ask for help when they need it. We need to ask ourselves what we can do about this urgent and increasing problem.

We need to stop telling our sons and all men in society at large to “man up” and “grow a pair”.

Pull yourself and others up for falling into those lazy tropes of belittling men for showing “weakness” or emotional vulnerability. It’s not difficult to build people up instead of tearing them down. Try it.

I am so proud of my son for his socially responsible efforts this Movember. It’s been a difficult year for everyone. Being unselfish and thinking about others right now is both vital and extraordinary.

I know it comes naturally for a man to grow his facial hair. But it’s what it represents and the fact that my relatively unassuming 20-year-old son is prepared to use his social media platfrom to raise awareness of mental health issues that impresses me.

He is setting an example for the rest of us to follow. Be kind to your fellow man and maybe less of them will decide to take their own lives through depression and despair.

Thanks for reading. If you can personally relate to the subject of this article and have concerns about the issues it has raised, please reach out for help.