My Little Shadow: Chapter 9

Meditation brings shadows into the light, and light into the shadows

Quack Quack Quack Quack

“MOM. Your duck is calling you.”

I turned the stove down and wiped my hands on the towel over my shoulder, laughing. “Thanks, Rudy. I’ll get it.”

Tony: Hey Sarah. There is still a negative feeling around you. Is everything okay?

Me: Hi, Tony. Yeah, she’s still here. Everything’s fine.

Tony: That explains your energy being off. I keep feeling like you’re fighting something. Must be her.

Me: Well… not quite. lol I am also fighting with Sir PeePeeHead. He’s the negative energy she’s attached to. Keeps trying to come in at us and I keep shoving him back. lol I was just going to ask you about him.

Tony: Were you? lol I must be psychic or something. Fill me in. Sounds interesting.

I told Tony about Grandma Agnes’ message to Wendy. The middle of the night visit with Sir PeePeeHead, the ‘one who came before’. Phyllis’ performance during Wendy’s meditation. As my fingers flew over the keypad, I realized what a blessing working with spirit was. It energized me. Gave me a greater purpose than being a wife and mother, which I loved.

Tony: You’ve had quite the week, haven’t you? Can I help at all?

Me: Naw, I think I’ve got it handled. She’s warming up to to me. Anything new with you?

Tony and I chatted while I finished up dinner for the kids and I. Geordie was out with his mom, so it was just the three of us for dinner. He’d missed dinner the week before, while she was visiting her sister, and wanted to check in with her.

It was difficult for him to have a relationship with his mom since her husband’s death a few years prior. Good visits were rare these days. She wore a shroud of negativity and bitterness like a shawl, pulled close for comfort.

Tony picked up on the negative energy attached to my little shadow friend, the ‘one who came before’. Victor, as Wendy discovered in her meditation. We both sensed his presence around the shadow, Phyllis, and noticed how he kept his distance from the house. A constant presence standing just outside the protective fires I set around my home’s perimeter.

Tony: This energy feeds off of negativity and fear. Older. Earthbound. Refuses to cross over. Most people aren’t aware of this going on in their homes. They just know something feels ‘off’.

Me: Great. Just what I need. A negative energy vampire waiting to prey on my family.

Tony: Right? lol I know. He doesn’t know what he’s up against with you. lol

Me: Maybe not, but I sense what I’m up against and it’s not going to be fun. I’ve been sensing an urgency.

Me: He’s getting antsy because Phyllis hasn’t done her job yet. She hasn’t ‘prepped’ us for him yet.

Tony: Yeah, I got that, too. She’s done this for him before. Too many times.

Tony: Pay attention to what happens this weekend. There’ll be signs pointing you to what you should be doing. Follow them. You won’t go wrong. This is another step on your path to becoming a rescue medium.

Me: Thanks. I think. lol I figured that. This isn’t my first rodeo, you know. Remember Jacob? He was tough, but more fun than this guy is shaping up to be. lol

Jacob Chatsworth was an older spirit I’d helped cross over a few years prior. He’d been angry and aggressive, but not as negative as this Victor was shaping up to be. Happy to cross over once I broke through his defences, Jacob is now a regular visitor.

I waved the kids in from the family room as Tony and I signed off our chat. Plates, steaming and aromatic, landed on their placemats as they slid into their chairs.

“All right! I love sloppy joe fries.” Rudy leaned his face over the steaming plate of french fries smothered in sloppy joe sauce and topped with cheese. “It’s my favourite. Thanks, Mumma.” Carly didn’t even bother thanking me. She shot me a thumbs up with a mouthful of fries and tomato sauce. I laughed at her. Like Grandma Hawkins, nothing made me happier than taking care of my family.

“Okay guys. Go finish up the projects you started after school today while I get ready for circle tonight.” The last of the dishes were rinsed and stacked in the dishwasher. I dried my hands on a towel and told them, “You have the rest of that movie waiting for you when you’re done, too.”

I left the kids to go set up the office to receive the spiritual development circle I hosted every week. A group of us get together to discuss mediumship, spirituality and working with spirit. More experienced members mentor the newer ones, helping them to hone their skills working with spirit. Our favourite part of every circle was the meditation, where we connected with spirit and asked for any messages to share with each other.

Hosting a spiritual development circle was overwhelming at first, but Wendy persuaded me to do it. The third year of the circle would end when school let out for the summer and I was already looking forward to next year.

Once the extra chairs were all set up, I smudged the office with my mugwort wand. Clearing out residual spiritual energy was important before circle. It gave us a clean slate to work with. Fragrant smoke curled around me, its protective haze sending negative energy out the open window.

The doorbell interrupted me, announcing the first arrival.

“Hey Wendy, long time no see.” I held the door open for her. “Didn’t think you’d be here tonight. Figured you’d had enough spirit fun this morning.”

“Yeah, I thought about skipping out, but I was chatting with Mom this afternoon and she convinced me to come anyway.” She grinned as she passed me. “Mom wanted me to see who showed up tonight. I think maybe she’s coming around to spirit.”

Wendy was followed into the house by Dean and Cheryl, two friends who joined us a few weeks after circle began. I waved to Roger, my sister’s neighbour, as he trotted up the driveway, waiting for him to wink as he passed me before shutting the door and trailing them into the office. The rest of the group trickled in over the next ten minutes. When everyone took their seats, we opened the circle.

“Okay, let’s get started. Ready, Sarah?”

“Sure am, Wendy.” With a clap, I rubbed my hands together and smiled. “Get yourselves comfortable, folks. Take a deep breath. Time to see what spirit has to say tonight.”

Wendy was the last to leave two hours later, calling ‘Goodnight’ over her shoulder as she dashed through a warm shower to her car. Amused, I called goodnight after her in the rain and closed the door behind her. I reflected on the events of the evening as I put the office back to normal.

Stunned, two new members graciously received messages from spirit during our recap. Their never-ending questions flew around the circle as the messages made it to their recipients. It took a bit, but we did our best to answer their inquiries.

Cheryl, one of our original members, had her Aunt drop a message to her. Confirmation came moments after Roger delivered it, in the text from Cheryl’s husband. Our first timer, Laura’s explosive ‘You’re freaking kidding me’ when a giggling Cheryl read the text out loud had us all busting a gut. Spirit makes believers out of all of us in the most incredulous ways.

“I guess Laura’s a believer now.” My mumbles, aimed at no one, had the kids raising their eyebrows at me. I shook my head at them as I walked into the family room. “Your movie almost over, guys?”

“Oh, it was over a while ago. Now America’s Funniest Home Videos is on.”

“Of course it is.” Carly and I rolled our eyes at each other, laughter bursting from us. “What else would you be watching other than a show older than you?”

“It’s bedtime, though. Let’s go.” They convinced me watching the last fifteen minutes was the right answer. “You still have a few more days of school left. Don’t take advantage.”

Carly and Rudy waved me into the office and out of their hair. It was time to reinforce the psychic protection around our home. Head on the back of the love seat, feet curled up under me, I rested my hands on my knees. Eyes closed, I began my deep, rhythmic breathing to help ease me into my meditation.

This Victor, the energy attached to Phyllis, was encroaching on my family’s spiritual well-being. As I sat there, I could feel him trying to get closer to us. It was necessary to push him back. To re-establish my control over my own home and the situation.

One final breath took me over the edge, deep into a meditative state. I pictured myself standing in front of our garage, facing the house.

Arms above my head, I took a deep breath and lowered them to shoulder height, turning clockwise in a circle, setting a perimeter of white light around my home.

I walked the perimeter, hand tracing the line of white light as I made my way around the house. White flames burned bright, replacing the line of light as I muttered an ancient Gaelic incantation meant to keep positive, loving energy in while repelling negative hateful energy.

Back at the garage door, I raised my hand in an arc above my head, watching as the white flames engulf the house in an enormous glowing dome. A decisive nod to a job well done, then I strode towards the house, a wave of my hand throwing the door open. Pulsating white orbs appear, one in each hand. I threw them, one at a time, through the door and into the house.

One went up the stairs and the other to the basement, travelling through the house. They filled every nook and cranny with positive, loving energy. The epitome of ‘in love and light’. One final deep breath. Chin raised, shoulders back, spine straightened, I entered the house with confidence. My home was secure, for the moment, and I had what it would take to keep my family safe.

Satisfied, I left the meditation confident in the protection I’d placed around my family and our home.

Deep breath in… and out. In… and out. Meditation over, relaxed and peaceful, I sat working through things in my mind. I was ready to work on helping Phyllis cross over. Saturday would be the day to do that. Everyone was out for the day and it would only be me home with the dog.

Carly’s feeble, but loud, protests amused me as I hustled her up to bed. That day had been Fun Day at school and the two of them spent the entire day outdoors with their friends. Fun Days at school were some of my best memories and I used to love volunteering when the kids were younger. It both thrilled and saddened me to hear them rehashing their day. The memories they’d made would stay with them for years to come, but they wouldn’t have any more Fun Days once they got to high school.

“Hey, Carly. How about next June you and I play hooky and head over to Jackson Heights for Rudy’s Fun Day?” Her exhausted, brilliant smile was beautiful.

“Sounds like a plan, Mum. Goodnight.” One hand on the doorknob, I dropped a peck to her cheek and hugged her close before she closed her door and headed to bed. I rapped quietly on Rudy’s door to say goodnight.

He was even easier to say goodnight to than Carly had been. Rudy’d put himself to bed while her television show was still on. Half asleep when I entered his room, I brushed his hair off his forehead, pressing a kiss to the bare skin.

“Goodnight, little man.” His murmured, barely coherent ‘I love you, Mumma’ led into a soft snore. My quiet chuckle no hope of disturbing him now.

It would be great if I fell asleep that easily.

Want to keep reading? Go to My Little Shadow: Chapter 10, here:

To start this story at the beginning, go to My Little Shadow: Chapter 1, here: