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Abstract

d family “ha ha happy new year” and call my mother. 3 minutes into the conversation with my mother I realized I was still exhausted. I was also annoyed that my husband was complaining about the politicians that were killing the vibe.</p><p id="d2f8">He loves politics so his way of distracting himself from being annoyed that the party stopped to swear in a governor was to go on a political rant. I HATE POLITICS. He ranted about everything wrong with new york, complain complain, complain.</p><p id="c9c4">I was thinking (or saying) “ could he just shut the fuck up?” I’m trying to talk to my mother, I’m exhausted, I didn’t want to talk anymore, I wanted to sleep. I got off the phone still lying on the coach at 12:05.</p><p id="012f">Still, he complained and tried to find something more pleasant to watch. This annoyed me, I didn't want to look for another show, I didn’t want to watch anything anymore, I wanted to sleep. Yet he still sounded like was complaining.</p><p id="1962">“could you stop complaining all the time”</p><h2 id="6225">The argument</h2><p id="2b1b">This was the start of an argument that made the kids scatter back into their own rooms. I remember saying he complained all the time especially about politics and him saying he’s not being negative, he’s just passionate about what he believes in.</p><p id="8ff5">I really don’t remember how the argument ended. All I know is that I must have passed out on the couch because I’m up at 4am writing this.</p><p id="b14d">I do remember, thinking he was being an asshole and him telling me that I’m just tired. Damn, I must have been so tired I didn't remember falling asleep. I was sleeping so soundly I was dreaming.</p><h2 id="03da">The Dream</h2><p id="ae26">I dreamt of a showerhead. Just this showerhead, bigger than an image I could find. What the hell does that mean?</p><figure id="421f"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/0*RQJaGCzjDSwKrTHR"><figcaption>Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@chanphoto?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Chandler Cruttenden</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Unsplash</a></figcaption></figure><p id="90a7">I’m not sure what it meant. I guess I wanted to wash away the past because I felt bad about what happened before I slept. I wish new year’s would’ve kept being more cheerful. I wished that the family could have kept having fun, that I wasn’t so tired and that politics didn’t bother me so much.</p><p id="b41e">In my drafts, I’m working on a piece titled “How Growing Up with a Political Father as a Little Rich Girl on a Little British Caribbean Island Screwed Me Up”. I know, It’s a long title LOL. <a href="https://jajarequa.medium.com/about">Follow me if my stories intrigue you:)</a> Anyway, that’s why I hate politics and maybe my dream meant I needed to resolve that issue.</p><p id="7bb8">The political childhood story is about how this ungrateful perspective still ruins my life today. I grew up in the Caribbean and moved to New York. Some people move to New York to be famous but I moved here to be anonymous.</p><h2 id="d084">A New Perspective</h2><p id="4eb0">In <a href="https://readmedium.com/why-im-celebrating-christmas-until-new-year-s-day-3d2e0a982d15">this story</a> :</p><div id="bf6e" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/why-im-celebrating-christmas-until-new-year-s-day-3d2e0a982d15"> <div> <div> <h2>Why I’m Celebrating Christmas until New Year’s Day🤣</h2> <div><h3>Maybe I’ll keep that Christmas spirit going all year long</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*PYGIAe9I1IfjxXvY)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><p id="c177">I shared my new yea

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r's resolutions for 2022…in it, I wrote:</p><blockquote id="0355"><p>2)<b>I’ve also decided to change my perspective when something or someone upsets me</b>. That stranger put me in a bad mood when he questioned why I was wearing Christmas clothes 3 days after Christmas but I could look at it in another way.</p></blockquote><p id="a09d">I was writing about what a stranger said to me that pissed me off; But when I stopped trying to make that person wrong and understood why I was feeling what I was feeling, my mood lifted and I felt much better.</p><p id="4dfe">I have to BEWARE of feeling pissed off because maybe it’s my subconscience showing me a valuable lesson about myself. I realized like my husband, that stranger wasn’t trying to piss me off and what I learned is:</p><p id="2080"><a href="https://readmedium.com/fear-of-love-is-gonna-f-ck-up-your-love-life-forever-guaranteed-8c255faeee5d">I’m fucked up and I need to change</a> for 2022.</p><figure id="8329"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/1*[email protected]"><figcaption>2018 Picture of My Husband and I with our Son, Jazz ( the other son was taking this picture:)</figcaption></figure><p id="85a4">Cheers!</p><h1 id="f970">More from me</h1><p id="009d">My first and last political story (or I’ll get my balls cut off for thinking different or stupid …you decide:)</p><div id="96f3" class="link-block"> <a href="https://jajarequa.medium.com/we-are-about-to-go-to-war-with-russia-is-our-american-president-senile-e38a5e344cad"> <div> <div> <h2>We are About to Go to War with Russia. Is our American President Senile?!?</h2> <div><h3>I hate to say it but… I’m disappointed with the way our current President is handling major issues.</h3></div> <div><p>jajarequa.medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*TTJalw1ki7Ktq56D)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><p id="a7d0">My kids:</p><div id="5320" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/i-lived-in-a-childrens-hospital-with-my-son-it-gave-me-so-much-joy-ae66aa0c30c4"> <div> <div> <h2>I Lived in a Children’s Hospital with my Son. It Gave Me so Much Joy</h2> <div><h3>I am grateful for my problems</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*1mb2DKpVfqWIth7xyMxejg.png)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><p id="28d2">Help me, God…I NEED it:</p><div id="13bc" class="link-block"> <a href="https://jajarequa.medium.com/new-years-resolution-failure-365814935cbf"> <div> <div> <h2>New Year’s Resolution Failure</h2> <div><h3>I feel like a pussy</h3></div> <div><p>jajarequa.medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*U6uUPx1dNrscuz7S)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="ec30" class="link-block"> <a href="https://jajarequa.medium.com/story-index-f31522b4108c"> <div> <div> <h2>Story Index</h2> <div><h3>Topic lists of stories I write</h3></div> <div><p>jajarequa.medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*[email protected])"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

My Husband and I Argued within The First 10 Minutes of The New Year!

Why a dream and a change of perspective make this ok.

January 2021 family photo: Me, my husband and 2 sons

New Year’s Eve

The back story of why we argued

I came home from work at 10:30 pm on New Year’s Eve and was exhausted. I was so tired from busting my ass at work that it took me a full ten minutes to get out of my car. All I wanted to do was go to bed but my husband was enthusiastically waiting to show off the new year’s day feast he cooked for me while I was at work.

I immediately felt bad because I had already eaten and was stuffed. They had thrown a big feast for the staff at work too. He lead me into the house and it smelled so good. He lit candles, he cleaned and wanted to show me the music he was gonna was DJ for my ‘new year's day’ CD he was going to make so I could hear it in my car.

A CD of a reggae mix my husband made me for Christmas 2021: Stay tuned for my story titled “My Favorite Thing to Do is Getting Drunk in My Car & Jamming Out Listening to Music”

I appreciated he was being so sweet. I faked enthusiasm when he encouraged me to drink that big bottle of Vodka, get drunk and party to celebrate 2022. We've been married for 20 years so he could tell that wasn’t gonna happen. He knew I was exhausted from work and all I wanted to do was pass out.

Although he was ready for us to turn our house into an NYC nightclub, he resolved to the fact that I wasn’t gonna change into my party clothes. I was going to change into comfy PJs and sleep. Midnight was in hour though and my husband wanted me to at least stay up to celebrate the new year’s countdown with our 2 sons.

I agreed to watch a short TV show until midnight and set the alarm for 11:45 in case I fell asleep. He tucked me into the coach with comfy sheets so I could watch the NYC ball drop when the time came for the count down. He made me a drink but halfway into the show, by 11:30pm, I was fast asleep.

(Side note: Am I boring you with this back story?🤣…I’ll get into why we argued in a second:)

Then I heard someone calling my name, then shaking me, then yelling “1 minute, 1 minute, wake up!”. I was pissed, I was in a deep sleep but then I remembered it was new year’s eve and was so happy they woke me up so I wouldn't miss the ball drop. #goals

I got up then my husband, 2 sons and I, held hands standing in the middle of the living room watching the NYC Ball drop in time square.(yay, we did it!)

10, 9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!

The whole family was jumping up and down with joy, hugging and kissing each other and dancing around to that “New York, New York song”.

Easter 2021 photo of my family. There’s a reason why we aged and got fatter in 3 months. I’ll write that story.

Then something went wrong

Politics happened. The music in the live ‘NYC new year’s ball drop’ show stopped to swear in the governor, this kind of dampened my mood because I hate politics but I was still in a good mood.

I took the opportunity to distract myself from this boring speech to group text my extended family “ha ha happy new year” and call my mother. 3 minutes into the conversation with my mother I realized I was still exhausted. I was also annoyed that my husband was complaining about the politicians that were killing the vibe.

He loves politics so his way of distracting himself from being annoyed that the party stopped to swear in a governor was to go on a political rant. I HATE POLITICS. He ranted about everything wrong with new york, complain complain, complain.

I was thinking (or saying) “ could he just shut the fuck up?” I’m trying to talk to my mother, I’m exhausted, I didn’t want to talk anymore, I wanted to sleep. I got off the phone still lying on the coach at 12:05.

Still, he complained and tried to find something more pleasant to watch. This annoyed me, I didn't want to look for another show, I didn’t want to watch anything anymore, I wanted to sleep. Yet he still sounded like was complaining.

“could you stop complaining all the time”

The argument

This was the start of an argument that made the kids scatter back into their own rooms. I remember saying he complained all the time especially about politics and him saying he’s not being negative, he’s just passionate about what he believes in.

I really don’t remember how the argument ended. All I know is that I must have passed out on the couch because I’m up at 4am writing this.

I do remember, thinking he was being an asshole and him telling me that I’m just tired. Damn, I must have been so tired I didn't remember falling asleep. I was sleeping so soundly I was dreaming.

The Dream

I dreamt of a showerhead. Just this showerhead, bigger than an image I could find. What the hell does that mean?

Photo by Chandler Cruttenden on Unsplash

I’m not sure what it meant. I guess I wanted to wash away the past because I felt bad about what happened before I slept. I wish new year’s would’ve kept being more cheerful. I wished that the family could have kept having fun, that I wasn’t so tired and that politics didn’t bother me so much.

In my drafts, I’m working on a piece titled “How Growing Up with a Political Father as a Little Rich Girl on a Little British Caribbean Island Screwed Me Up”. I know, It’s a long title LOL. Follow me if my stories intrigue you:) Anyway, that’s why I hate politics and maybe my dream meant I needed to resolve that issue.

The political childhood story is about how this ungrateful perspective still ruins my life today. I grew up in the Caribbean and moved to New York. Some people move to New York to be famous but I moved here to be anonymous.

A New Perspective

In this story :

Why I’m Celebrating Christmas until New Year’s Day🤣

Maybe I’ll keep that Christmas spirit going all year long

medium.com

I shared my new year's resolutions for 2022…in it, I wrote:

2)I’ve also decided to change my perspective when something or someone upsets me. That stranger put me in a bad mood when he questioned why I was wearing Christmas clothes 3 days after Christmas but I could look at it in another way.

I was writing about what a stranger said to me that pissed me off; But when I stopped trying to make that person wrong and understood why I was feeling what I was feeling, my mood lifted and I felt much better.

I have to BEWARE of feeling pissed off because maybe it’s my subconscience showing me a valuable lesson about myself. I realized like my husband, that stranger wasn’t trying to piss me off and what I learned is:

I’m fucked up and I need to change for 2022.

2018 Picture of My Husband and I with our Son, Jazz ( the other son was taking this picture:)

Cheers!