My Best Friend Got Trolled Today and I Did Nothing

Damned if you do something, damned if you don’t on social media

There was a time in my life when I believed that people whom I called friends would have my back. They didn’t.

I may be a blogger, however, in real life, I do not possess the gift of gab (to spread malicious gossip) and make people believe the worst about others (me).

In a way, it was eye-opening for it made me see who my genuine friends were and who were just there for the show.

I have the feeling that sometimes online writing can imitate real life but on a much bigger stage.

One of the first things my family was concerned about when I started blogging was whether I was prepared to handle the negative comments and criticism that come the way of any blogger, small and big.

Is it surprising therefore that one of the most common types of online harassment is mean comments?

Perhaps it is the anonymity that social media provides that is fuel for some to leave nasty comments with the goal of provoking a reaction, as this excerpt explains: “All these people want to do is bring others down — they want you to feel insecure and upset. And because of the anonymity social media provides, they feel secure to comment what they want without thinking how those comments can affect others. While the simplest advice is to ignore those comments and shake them off, we know that can be hard. Besides, you have to deal with them without compromising your brand and what you stand for.”

The mean comments did find me pretty early on in my writing journey but the shocking thing is they have always been my one-time followers who apparently woke up on the wrong side of the bed one morning and decided I needed some killing (in the comments).

This is one of the main reasons I moved to Substack where I am happy to say I have a supportive readership for my blog “Yana’s World.”

Sometimes I write an article to express my hurt and bewilderment at being attacked by someone whom I considered a Medium friend or acquaintance.

In hindsight, I wish I had simply ignored or blocked them — none of them were worth my time or energy.

The thing is I never stopped to consider the readers who got caught in between until I became one of them.

A while back, I had sat down to read the latest from a writer whose articles I enjoy only to discover it was an attack post. It was aimed at another writer whom I also read.

Talk about an awkward not to mention an uncomfortable situation.

What do I do?

A) Beat a hasty retreat.

B) Leave a light-hearted comment that is neither here nor there.

C) Feel utter dismay that this mudslinging match is taking place on a public platform

D) I feel under pressure to take sides.

It was by no means a win-win situation — something had changed and I have to admit that the more convincing writer did create doubts in my mind (where none existed earlier) about the other writer. So I chose not to read both writers.

I lost two regular readers that day.

A while back, a close Medium friend got attacked in the comments.

What does one do in such situations?

The thing that made it more awkward was we, as in the person who wrote the comment, and the other readers including myself were all familiar faces.

So, it came down to making a difficult decision:

A) Jump into the fray and escalate the situation

B) Declare my support and loyalty to my friend

C) Stay out of it

D) Tell the people involved to hash it out elsewhere

🎈I am curious, what would you have done in such a situation?

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