Motherhood Is Not Always Rainbows and Butterflies

When it comes to creativity

Life became somewhat boring after becoming a mom.

There, I said it. Don’t judge me.

Not because of my toddler, who’s an angel, although an opinionated one; the challenge lies in rediscovering myself creatively as a stay-at-home mother.

Don’t get me wrong; life is great, and I feel incredibly blessed. I’m immensely grateful for all the things life has to offer — big, small, chaotic, and messy.

Interestingly, boredom provides an opportunity for reflection and creativity. So, when I have downtime or moments of quiet, my mind is free to wander, and new ideas may surface, depending on the day.

That’s how I began writing online.

Technically, I’m not bored because I’m constantly in alert mode. I’m stuck between balancing my creativity and making sure my son doesn’t bust his head open while climbing the stairs or jumping on the couch.

I wrote an article on how I find the time to try and “do it all”:

I’ll be honest; it’s a lot to be the best mom I can be without feeling like I’m neglecting my child just because I want to write more when an idea sparks. It’s normal, and the important thing is that I am aware of it, and that’s something.

Right?

But what happens when, during that window that you get to finally create, you don’t feel like writing? You’re burnt out? You don’t know what to write about? Your kid only gave you one hour of peace and quiet, which wasn’t enough, so now you’re contemplating if it’s even a good story. And you would rather eat comfort food and watch TV.

These things happen, you know. That familiar feeling of not doing enough while also managing to do it all. My head spins just thinking about it.

I’m not complaining; I’m simply expressing what many parents, especially mothers, are afraid to say aloud, which drives me a little crazy. No wonder many of us feel alone and misunderstood; no one talks about this shit.

On platforms such as Medium and the Peanut app, I notice parents, particularly mothers, sharing their experiences and expressing frustrations. When I felt incredibly lonely, this is where I spent most of my time reading or asking questions when my son was a newborn. These discussions frequently focus on real-life situations and issues.

The desire to “have it all” during motherhood often leads to feeling bored, trapped, or stuck. As Judy Blume said,

“Maybe we can have it all, but not all at once.”

We get so caught up in entertaining our children and forget about ourselves.

When boredom strikes in the everyday mundane, I try to embrace it and escape, doing what I enjoy. I use that boredom to brainstorm because everything that surrounds me is a story to tell. It allows me to delve into my thoughts, memories, and emotions, which can be a great source of inspiration for my writing.

When I don’t find inspiration to write, the only thing that makes me feel better is a good workout, even if it’s just a walk outside. It’s the best medicine for changing my mood or perception of things.

Does chasing after a toddler approaching the “terrible twos” count as physical activity?

I’m honest about my willingness to explore different approaches to improve my writing, including taking breaks when necessary.

Writing should be enjoyable, not stressful. Encountering challenges in maintaining that balance is entirely okay.

Most days are filled with joy as I cherish moments with my little boy, fully aware that these precious times are fleeting, even if they’re hard as hell. Craving a lengthy, kid-free getaway vacation is my secret desire — without struggling with mom guilt? Well, that’s a story for another time.

Thank you for reading.

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