Month of Love, Month of Lies

365 Days of F(ib)B-ing- Chapter 6

Day 46- February 16

‘Love is in the air!’

I knew it. Every year, something or the other happens during Valentine’s Day.

At least two people I know get hitched or proposed to.

But this year, it’s like so many people have decided to shed their single status.

Just read my list below.

1. Dia got a marriage proposal. By her colleague. She refused.

2. Dia again. This time the marriage proposal was by an extremely eligible Project Manager living in Prague (Is it not that the place where the movie ‘Rockstar’ was shot — the World heritage Site or something? Guys only think beer sadly when they hear about this city — Dia told me). His parents are business folks as are Dia’s parents and they really liked her at some mutual acquaintance’s son’s wedding. They are hoping to see Dia next month with their son (coming down for a month’s visit) for an official ‘see-over’ if Dia is agreeable to their son’s photo (to be emailed today) and profile.

3. Arun’s sister is in love with a colleague who proposed to her on Valentine’s Day. Arun does not like it as it is his sister but since she said yes and the guy in question is a nice bloke, it might be wedding bells for the two very soon. I did not term it appropriate to ask if any of the sides had confided to their parents or anything. He needs time to digest all this before I grill him.

4. Another biggie. Jessie got engaged. To some cousin in Dubai. He apparently was wooing her for the past month after her parents said yes. She had reservations about him — she felt he is a bit too modern and flighty apparently, so they were chatting over Skype, Google Hangout, and WhatsApp to see if they were compatible (what an ugly and uncaringly tossed-about word) or not. I knew something was up with this girl. She has plans to quit the company as soon as the wedding dates are announced. My fingers are crossed — it better not be before this project or I am a sitting duck amidst these hunting bosses.

5. Ketan, you remember him? The guy with the crush on Vibha. He proposed to her. Via Facebook Messenger. She refused.

6. Ketan got a proposal too. Some classmate. He refused. What???

7. Shammi got a proposal for marriage. Lord, but you’d think the entire community knew that she was blissfully engaged. But no, some bloke liked her profile on Shaadi.com and asked his parents to approach her. Rati Aunty passed on the connection for Kittu and me. Really?

8. Yes, the last one was so startlingly out of the blue and annoying that I was speechless when Ma told me about it. I am terrified now. Shammi is engaged! This means only Kittu and I remain in the marriageable age in the family. Kittu is almost two years younger than me and practically a kid. She is still some months away from twenty-two. So, that leaves only ME!!

9. No!!!! No!!!!

10. NO! ! ! ! ! !

I am so horrified at not having realized that I am the next bakra* for being married off. All I can think of is how I will be the scapegoat for everyone’s matchmaking efforts and machinations. No more happily traipsing at functions and having fun.

Thank God, I did not tell Ma or Pa about the incident on Friday. Ma would have seen it as an omen — auspicious for her, bad for me — to pull a ‘chat mangni, pat byah’ on me.

I am definitely going to concentrate on keeping this job safe and secure or getting one far, far away from the madding crowd of family matrons.

Goodbye!

(bakra = Hindi word for scapegoat)

(chat mangni, pat byah —It translates to the concept of arranging for a short engagement followed quickly with an actual wedding ceremony)

Day 47- February 17

‘Happy Maha Shivratri!’

Dia will get the photograph tomorrow. The prospective groom wants to send her the photograph directly.

Haha! That is just an excuse for saying we are trying to curate some decent photographs before we send them to you. Or maybe they just were not prepared for a fantastic girl like Dia to say ‘Yes’ to agree to see a strange guy.

I don’t know. But I am going to be totally suspicious for the sake of my amazing friend.

Dia, you deserve only the best in life including a life partner.

Fingers Crossed!

Day 48- February 18

‘We live in hope.’

Dia got the photograph. She likes it. We both are consequently, sitting in my apartment, together after work, with my never-ending supply of chips, Coke, some dhabeli*, ketchup, ‘Legally Blonde’ movie DVDs, Aiyyangar Bakery pastries, and spicy bhel* in full preparation for the investigation.

I will not call it cyber stalking but rather investigating this guy on the digital front. Obviously using Dia’s ID would be silly.

Plus, she needs an unbiased opinion — okay, okay, a loyal opinion biased in her favor!

Dia has offered — no — warned me of her help/ partnership, call it what you like when I get a marriage proposal.

In fact, we are about to begin now, just as soon as I finish scribbling this in a speedy fashion.

Fingers crossed.

Bye!

Updated before Bedtime:

The guy looks cool. Friendly, sporty and chilled out. With a great-looking car and a neat little apartment. (His own, OMG!) His parents were in the house and car photos so seem pretty okay so far.

We are awaiting his physical company next month to ascertain his suitability for Dia. I will accompany Dia if things proceed suitably and he asks her out.

Yay!

*dhabeli, *bhel are all street food items popular in Mumbai.

Day 49- February 19

‘Congrats Jessie!’

She is getting married in less than three months' time. That means she is quitting as soon as the project is over. Her wedding is in Goa.

I hope to be invited.

I shall go.

I have never visited Goa and want to.

Hehe! [Insert cheeky wink!]

Day 50- February 20

‘So much work!’

But so little interference!

Thank God!

I like to work without people hovering and micromanaging or wasting my time in endless, pointless meetings and calls. More work gets done that way. Our project is going great. We still have a lot of ‘visibility’ but we are on targets consistently.

Yes, I am keeping my eyes open for better-paying jobs and also tabs on buzzwords to stay current and fresh!

Day 51- February 21

‘Of temples and Temple Run’

I did both today. Ma and I went to the temple for the morning Puja* (holy prayers) [groan!] and in return for my good girl behavior lay in bed all day playing Temple Run.

Arun hooked me to this game.

Can’t talk anymore as I need to conquer the next level!

Day 52- February 22

‘Slow internet!’

Why? It took me seventeen minutes and eight failed attempts to add this status update. Oh, the horror!

Day 53- February 23

‘No respite from the cold!’

When will the cold subside? I am so glad I brought some winter gear. Pune is so bitterly cold.

Day 54- February 24

‘Exciting times ahead’

Less than a month from now, on March 21, a prospective groom will see Dia for the first time. Wow, I feel so serious and grown up and sentimental!

Until I imagine the cheeky face of the heroine of the hour!

Day 55- February 25

‘A Wednesday!’

Interesting that I watched this movie (yes, the one titled A Wednesday) on a Wednesday.

Nothing much going on in work life. It is simply hectic — like always. We have about three weeks left, which means none of us, can slip up. Jessie and I are almost friends now. She is in such a happy moony engaged state that she does not mind me or anything for that matter.

I must happily update you, my darling Diary on my personal life, or more accurately about the life and times of people I care for. Arun is having a stressful work front as well, what with some big deployment coming up. He is working weekends as well and has simply stopped going home on weekends.

I have offered to take some stuff from his Mom this weekend; so I can allay her fears. I am still waiting for an opportune moment to get tidbits about his sister. Please, I am not being a pervert or even looking for gossip. I have a genuine interest in the lives and families of my best friends.

Dia is all curious and unsure and excited about meeting the ‘boy’. For some reason, she does not want to chat or call or email him (Alok is his name) until she completes the formal ‘see-over’. I know the pros and cons of this ‘Do not acquaint yourself until things are formally arranged’ scenario of Indian matchmaking and alliance forging.

Not having gone through this myself, I am not entirely convinced of this logic, but I am not completely averse to Dia following it either it. In a dangerously fake virtual world, as I am well aware, face-to-face meetings can convey much better impressions than any virtual avatar can.

Shammi is ecstatic about her wedding date. She is getting a May wedding in Chennai. I am supposed to wear a saree, because, well, because … you get it!

Shammi and I are of almost the same age.

I am of marriageable age.

I am a big girl and should wear a saree.

Got it!

I said ‘Yes!’

Ma was surprised and suspicious. I am going to array myself in a traditional saree only for the main muhurat* though. And for that — I am going to buy a splendid designer Kanjeevaram*.

Plus, here is the catch that Ma still does not know about. I am going to get a designer blouse.

Ma told me ‘No sleeveless’, but you know how it works.

There are ways and there are ways!

I am thinking of mega sleeves or transparent chiffon sleeves or cute puff ones.

I am honest about my figure or lack of one, so backless is not an option. Besides, I do not want to be the single cause for plenty of cardiac arrests just to spite anyone.

With all the older folks on the guest list, that is a real possibility. We do not want Anand Jiju to be performing CPR in the middle of reciting Vedic chants, right?

Still browsing through saree and blouse styles.

On that happy note, getting back to my Googling!

Adieu!

muhurat* (auspicious time/event)

Kanjeevaram* = famous Indian silk sarees

Day 56 — February 26

‘Engagement treat by Jessie!’

I must say that picture came out really well. I suppose a ‘chaat’ treat always brings out the goofy and happy on everybody’s faces. Thankfully, I was dressed nicely today — white and pink churidar kurta. Not exactly an amazing dress, but does me good. And my hair behaved as well the entire time and during the photos.

I could hardly believe it!

I am not sure if it is the hair spray or just a freaky lucky stroke, but I am glad about it. Gave me an excellent mug shot for Facebook. It had to be one of the few times I did not mind being tagged in someone else’s photos.

So, it’s off to see try a new style — simple, obviously, with this hair spray before I go out for some grocery and household shopping.

Update:

It seems to be working.

Finally, something to tame that mane of mine.

Fingers crossed.

Will try it tomorrow before leaving for the office.

Day 57- February 27

‘Dinner at Rati Aunty’s place’

Scribbling this note as we drive back from a sumptuous dinner and a fun evening at Rati Aunty’s place.

Thank God, for 3G!

I just updated this status and posted this picture twenty minutes before midnight. And will surely finish writing a short précis in this journal also.

Gosh, the things you have to do to keep up this resolution!

Ok, in supersonic speed, here is the gist. I dressed in my favorite jeans and a nice black comfortable T to the office. You know something workable yet not too drab. I finished all my work at top speed and rushed out at four just in time to shove my way into a Shivneri bus and reach home at seven-thirty.

I had done my makeup, minimal of course, before leaving the office, and touched it up at the rest area, where my bus stopped. So, fifteen minutes to dump my bag, change into a better ‘dhinchak*’ kurta and redo my hair and makeup were all I needed.

Luckily Ma and Pa had everything ready, so we easily reached Aunty’s home at eight-ten. Some socializing later, dinner was served to Anand Jiju’s family and ours. By the time we all finished dinner, a long post-meal chat session, and got into the car, it was past eleven.

And that was my superb day — long, hectic but thoroughly enjoyable!

Sweet Dreams!

dhinchak* = blingy

Day 58- February 28

‘Month End Splurges!’

I bought a new iPod.

My old MP3 player is battered by all the rough use I accorded it. So, it was time for a change and an updated model to be purchased. This shiny new metallic rani pink is so stunning and girly. And the music that booms through the earphones is stunning.

I love it!

Did you like the daily adventures of Avantika’s life? Then do read the previous episode here: