Letter To Self I Think It Is Time To Quit
I do not think I can do this
I do not think I can do this anymore.
There is too much going on in my head, and I am not coping. If I could see inside my brain, I would see a colorful web of jumping nerve impulses — colorful, but painful. Painful and unfulfilling.
A writer I am not. Just a want-to-be.
Just when I think I can, all my confidence is sucked away.
I want a different life.
An intelligent conversation would be nice.
Knowing that I will be able to survive after my husband dies would be nice too. What will I do? I have not figured that out yet.
The stress and anxiety are killing me — literally.
Reading this may explain why — https://readmedium.com/life-is-about-change-5d44f928d4ba
Writing helped a bit, but now, nothing seems to be helping.
I have been doing this since April 2019 and I have yet to have one story go viral. Not one. The highest $ earned in one month I think was around $12.00.
I suck at social media. Tweeter suspended me — still not sure why.
Writing was supposed to be joyful, inspiring, and soothing. Now I feel like it is a struggle, and maybe I am not cut from the right cloth.
Perhaps I should just quit.