Learning to love your body

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wered. But it also makes me feel uncomfortable because I have this huge french balcony overlooking the streets outside and the parking below!</p><p id="92c5">I live on the first floor and people can lift their heads and see the french balcony, and exactly they would see me too! There are buildings around, but people need to get an angle to look into my apartment. So, in a nutshell, it’s not that people <i>will really</i> look at me but it <i>feels </i>like they’ll look at me! And when they do, they’ll see my revealing body that’s not so beautiful.</p><p id="849b">Oh, I even feel silly writing about this! Like, it doesn’t even make sense that I feel like this about my own body. But, by just thinking the idea of others looking at me and thinking something along the lines of <i>‘wow, that doesn’t look nice!’</i> or <i>‘that’s not a beautiful girl!’ </i>always scares me though I know there is no reason to have a thinking that other people would feel something like that.</p><p id="c4a6">In fact, I’m not overweight or anything like that, may be just a bit of fat on my stomach, and everything else, I think — I <i>know — </i>I look nice. But it’s just so hard to overcome this feeling!</p><p id="eb79">I think one of the reasons why young people like me to feel like this is because of how we as a society perceives human body and how we associate it with beauty. Of course, it’d be easy to blame that we all feel like this because of movie stars and social media influencers who are always trying to appear beautiful and hot while man

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y outlets out there doing photoshop pictures to make their models more sexy.</p><p id="73fd">That’d indeed be easier. I know I’ve to grow above this mentality — that twisted belief of what beauty is, as seen in carefully curated and designed pictures on the internet is wrong — and see myself as beautiful.</p><p id="746d">I often see people out there in the wild, on the streets, and I think they’re beautiful. I see guys with abs and muscles or girls with good calves and flat bellies and my mind immediately goes into a "<i>see-that! that-is-beautiful-now-see-yours!" </i>mode. May be others see me and thinking the same about me, that I’m beautiful too. I don’t know! I won’t know until I believe in myself and let me present myself the way I feel comfortable and the way I love.</p><p id="dcbb">© Kelly Bates-Secret 2021.</p><div id="bdce" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/be-open-submission-guidelines-41ea51ef4ef1"> <div> <div> <h2>We Invite You to Become Our Writer — Be Open Submission Guidelines</h2> <div><h3>You don’t have to be a great writer or super perfect human to contribute here. I believe everyone can become inspirator…</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*eBrTZS3wC0WwzBZjivi7tg.png)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

Being self-aware without being self-critical

I know this is a common problem these days and I’m sad to admit that I also fall in this category. I really don’t feel too comfortable with my body. It’s not that I hate it per se, not at least as seriously as some people out there who really suffer from body dysmorphia disorder and needs proper therapy or treatment. I’m among those many youngsters who feel that their body isn’t nice enough to flaunt it around.

I don’t feel comfortable showing my skin except on my face and limbs. Well, not even limbs; I should perhaps to say just the areas below my elbows and knees. For example, I can’t go to a beach because I can’t wear swimsuit. I’d just not feel comfortable!

The one thing that bugs me more than anything is that I can’t even wear whatever I want in my own apartment. Such as, I reeeeeally love to wear strapped tops and short-shorts and walking around in my apartment. Honestly, it makes me feel sexy wearing them. It makes me feel empowered. But it also makes me feel uncomfortable because I have this huge french balcony overlooking the streets outside and the parking below!

I live on the first floor and people can lift their heads and see the french balcony, and exactly they would see me too! There are buildings around, but people need to get an angle to look into my apartment. So, in a nutshell, it’s not that people will really look at me but it feels like they’ll look at me! And when they do, they’ll see my revealing body that’s not so beautiful.

Oh, I even feel silly writing about this! Like, it doesn’t even make sense that I feel like this about my own body. But, by just thinking the idea of others looking at me and thinking something along the lines of ‘wow, that doesn’t look nice!’ or ‘that’s not a beautiful girl!’ always scares me though I know there is no reason to have a thinking that other people would feel something like that.

In fact, I’m not overweight or anything like that, may be just a bit of fat on my stomach, and everything else, I think — I know — I look nice. But it’s just so hard to overcome this feeling!

I think one of the reasons why young people like me to feel like this is because of how we as a society perceives human body and how we associate it with beauty. Of course, it’d be easy to blame that we all feel like this because of movie stars and social media influencers who are always trying to appear beautiful and hot while many outlets out there doing photoshop pictures to make their models more sexy.

That’d indeed be easier. I know I’ve to grow above this mentality — that twisted belief of what beauty is, as seen in carefully curated and designed pictures on the internet is wrong — and see myself as beautiful.

I often see people out there in the wild, on the streets, and I think they’re beautiful. I see guys with abs and muscles or girls with good calves and flat bellies and my mind immediately goes into a "see-that! that-is-beautiful-now-see-yours!" mode. May be others see me and thinking the same about me, that I’m beautiful too. I don’t know! I won’t know until I believe in myself and let me present myself the way I feel comfortable and the way I love.