Laurel & Hardy
Hair count
Behind the locked door of Hardy’s house in the toilet seemed a flickering earthquake. Nugget & Whisker see eye to eye, shaking their head in disbelief. Nugget, the fish, drew on his rain-proof earplugs to avoid the nuisance. Whisker, the cat, also decided not to be a participant in such the hustle and bustle. Shot to turn on the TV to her favorite cartoon Tom & Jerry.
All of a sudden, Whisker the Cat saw Laurel using her gateway again to pass by. Whisker showed all her teeth with pinched skin like a hand fan and a twisted nose in cherry style on the pie. On expressing disagreement sharing a gate with him, Laurel raised his hat and bowed down to make up. Then he made his way to Hardy’s loud cries.
Laurel navigating the voice, finds himself crossing the upstairs hallway halting in the room placed at the end, subject to a closed washroom door. Mumbo-jumbo resounds and resonated throughout the atmosphere.
Laurel: What has happened, Hardy? Are you trying to master singing again on a new tool?
Hardy’s got his breathing and heart rate under control. Grinding his teeth spoke.
Hardy: You have again come to trouble me. Run along & get busy with somebody else.
Laurel stood firm and started punching the door with his closed fist. The thunderous pounding on the door left the windows vibrating.
Laurel: I’m not moving till the time I see you face to face, even if it means breaking down this door.
Hardy, all of a sudden, roared with laughter and buzzed.
Hardy: With your exterior and interior combined in full force, too, you cannot swing it to rattle. To tear down the door is a distant aspiration.
Laurel, in a slumped posture, toneless dialogue & shuffling feet, started digging his deep pockets. Finally, he took out a petite shrank comb began drilling it in the keyhole. All of a sudden, he threw it down, discarding it and staring at his right little finger. His eyes creased around the corner with a sudden flash of a 100-watt light bulb in his eyes.
Hardy: Hey Buddy, all of a sudden, my ears have gone silenced. I can’t hear a word you’re saying. Don’t dare think of chucking me in this thick & thin.
Hardy, by curiosity, biting his lower lip & bending his eyes, opened the door jar open. Laurel with his broad, mouth open flinching & squeezing his eyes shut.
Laurel: Do you consider yourself in invisible mode? I agree that we saw each other nude as children, and then things get ugly on the body after that. I refuse to catch myself in this mode. As I know, I end up with nightmares on the kind of hair, which raises & spreads like a fungus on every inch.
Laurel, with a puckered forehead & hunched shoulder, tossed a blanket size towel on Hardy. Which Hardy holds it like his bait &, sticking his neck out, snorting, took off. Laurel glides like his tail poking his fingers on Hardy here & there. Hardy altered with an elevated chin, clenching his jaw & tugging on his towel. Laurel raises his little right-hand finger as an object of pride.
Laurel: Do you remember this master key that you gave me without asking? You first pinned me in the middle of the river with your oar, then went violently panting with your breathless hands, pulling me at the sight of a crocodile.
Hardy crashed in tee-hee… He rolled in the aisle, hugging his body.
Hardy: You should be grateful it’s no gift from me. But crocodile that, instead of a skinny body, sensed that your little finger was more fleshy. You could have made news if you were not so reluctant in displaying your pinky finger shape left artfully as a master key to open any doorway.
Laurel slapped the table and doubled over with joy.
Laurel: I was not at all ready for a test subject for scientific laboratories. Buddy, forget about this. Please tell me what’s bothering you.
Hardy, out of emotions, began rubbing his head with both his hands by discarding his towel wrapper. Laurel jumped to hold the falling drape. Tearful Hardy with crunchy voice and lower lips.
Hardy: My hair loss has recently lost track of the number. While I touch, they drop off. When I sneeze, they descend. I cough, they crash. I laugh; they diminish. Shaking your head, yes and no, is a challenge as well. I desire to know the stats of hair per day loss.
Laurel was a great listener until Hardy finished. He quickly unscrewed the big lampshade which had thwarted them — holding the lampshade; he stalked towards Hardy. Hardy took a while to figure out what was going on.
Laurel: Buddy, let’s put this with a funnel mouth wide opening around your neck. Each autumn will stop at your framework. By the end of the day, we’ll have the math tour.
Hardy, out of excitement, shook his shoulders so hard he peed himself. Laurel looks down at the puddle grew into an uncontrollable laugh.
Special Credit/Loans: Nugget the Fish, Whisker the Cat, Artistic Crocodile, Handicap Lampshade.
Written, Directed & Produced by Diya Saini.
