Kickass Relationship Advice I Crowdsourced From The Internet

Summary

The article provides a collection of insightful relationship advice sourced from various internet users, emphasizing the importance of personal growth, emotional connection, and realistic expectations in maintaining healthy relationships.

Abstract

The author of the article has compiled a list of relationship wisdom from across the internet, aiming to guide individuals on how to foster successful partnerships. The advice ranges from the importance of becoming the right person for a relationship rather than just seeking the right partner, to the concept of building and maintaining social capital as if in a bank account. It highlights the difference between the fleeting high of a one-night stand and the profound wealth of love in a lasting relationship. The article also suggests that true love involves honesty and accountability, and that heartbreak can lead to personal growth and a deeper understanding of life. It encourages readers to focus on being teammates with their partners, to avoid desperation in seeking relationships, and to recognize the value of enduring through imperfections. The advice further touches on the role of oxytocin in relationships, the necessity of effective communication, and the impact of unhealed trauma on relationship dynamics.

Opinions

Relationships require continuous effort and investment, similar to managing a bank account.
Love is not just about emotional highs; it's about the long-term journey and growth with another person.
Honesty and the willingness to call out each other's flaws are key components of a healthy relationship.
Divorce should be seen as an opportunity for learning and self-improvement, rather than just a failure.
Maintaining the mindset of being on a first date can help keep the spark alive in long-term relationships.
Heartbreak can serve as a catalyst for positive life changes and self-discovery.
Emotional connection and effective communication are more important than the pursuit of a soulmate.
Stability in a relationship is linked to the stability of the individuals involved.
Desperation in seeking a partner can be unattractive; confidence and self-sufficiency are more appealing.
Long-term relationships involve accepting and working through imperfections.
Oxytocin can create an initial spark in relationships, but true love is what sustains beyond this chemical reaction.
Successful couples inspire each other to achieve their best selves.
Unhealed trauma can lead to a pattern of seeking out unhealthy relationships.
Selflessness in love, such as committing to a partner despite knowing the relationship will end tragically, exemplifies true strength and courage.

#17 — Oxytocin isn’t love. Don’t be secretly fooled.

I’m a drunk in love at the best of times.

I suck at relationships, but I’m learning.

For the last few years, I’ve kept a library of the best advice. It’ll help you be luckier in love, attract awesome friends, and improve family relationships.

“People spend too much time worrying about finding the right person, and not enough time becoming the right person.” (OrangeBook)

Austin Belcak describes relationships like bank accounts. I’m an ex-banker and love it. You have to make deposits into your relationship bank account. If you don’t make deposits, there are penalties for withdrawing. He says you’ve got to “build social capital before you spend it.”

A one-night stand is a transaction that makes you feel rich. Love is an ongoing relationship that makes you wealthy.

A true lover will call you out on your BS.

Divorce happens too soon. You need a chance to extract the lessons from it, otherwise, you’ll do the same thing with your next partner.

On the first date you’ll do anything for the other person. The longer you’re together, the less you adopt this mindset because you start measuring what you’re getting. Tony Robbins says do what you did at the start of the relationship and there won’t be an end. Treat every day like a first date.

Have fun and go on dates. Otherwise, you’re roommates, says writer Sean Kernan. Roommates don’t kiss. Kiss more to break the cycle.

A broken heart can fix the rest of your life. Sometimes you’ve gotta have your heart smashed to pieces to learn gratitude, understand the meaning of life, and find your true calling. Heartbreak is silent transformation.

Don’t be sorry if you get divorced. At least you lived (According to divorcee Amelia Sordell.)

Relationships are about the transfer of emotion between two people. It’s why singers who sing covers fail. They don’t feel the songs they sing. They focus on vocal acrobatics instead of emotion. Show emotion. Don’t hide it.

Focus on being teammates instead of soulmates for relationship success. (Ryan Stephens)

There’s no such thing as a stable relationship with an unstable person. Choose carefully.

Don’t look desperate when you’re looking for a partner. People can see it a mile away. It’s ugly. Care less to attract more.

The older generations get divorced less and stay together longer. This is no accident. If you speak to them they’ll tell you their secret. A relationship is about two permanently imperfect people refusing to give up on each other. Don’t give up so easily. Work sh*t out.

Taking a risk on a relationship that might not work out is better than living with regrets about what could have been.

The best couples push each other to be better than they thought they could be. My wife and I do this. We always want to be 1% better. Mantra: “Current failure shows future potential.”

Oxytocin makes us delusional. After a few months of seeing someone it dies down. We mistakenly think the spark is gone. Nope. The love didn’t vanish. Oxytocin isn’t love. Don’t be fooled. (Zain Kahn)

Bad communication destroys relationships. Become a good communicator to have more luck with love. Learn to communicate how you feel. Listen a lot too.

A deep conversation with your partner often reignites your connection with them after a busy day at work. Have long talks.

Relationships become complicated when one (or both) are adult babies — those who are bad with money, immature emotionally, and who don’t know what they want. Get your sh*t together before starting a relationship.

Unhealed trauma screws up a relationship. It makes you see healthy relationships as boring because they’re not as exciting as dating psychopaths that create chaos that leads to toxic relationships.

Getting married, even when you know your fiancé is going to die, is the real definition of badass. Selflessness creates enormous power that transcends death. (Brett Tokar did this. Legend.)