I’ve Lost My Motivation

Have you seen it?

A few weeks back, I lost my motivation.

I have looked everywhere for it, and I’m afraid I might have misplaced it when I was on vacation. That is the last place I recall seeing it. I’m worried — this is the longest it has ever been gone.

I put up signs around the neighborhood hoping someone might see my motivation:

• Just Do It
• Be Awesome Today
• You’re a Winner

The signs didn’t seem to help and someone defaced one of them — it now reads, Be Absent Today. What nerve!

I’m beginning to fear the worst. Maybe my motivation was stolen in the recent crime surge?

Whoever took it will likely regret the act because it is not worth much these days. It’s an older version and doesn’t function as well as some of the younger models. I frequently have to kick it hard to get it started and then it loses power quickly.

Even though my motivation is old and unpredictable, I want it back. It’s been in the family for many years and has sentimental value.

If you see my motivation wandering around, approach it cautiously because it can be skittish and easily scared off. In my experience, Oreo cookies and tea work well to coax it out of its hiding place.

Despite the effort required to capture my motivation, it is well worth it. I’m offering a reward — somewhere between $500 and $0 depending on the condition you return it in.

In the meantime, if you have a cup of motivation I can borrow, I would sure appreciate it. I promise to use it sparingly.