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Abstract

instantly. Kind of like the magically delicious in Lucky Charms. Or maybe it’s that Westworld chip that they planted in my leg that keeps giving me reveries.</p><p id="a4e9">I’m telling you, this is why Pastafarians where colanders as headgear.</p><figure id="8439"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/1*i_iGIq5r2IFmpgTHD7TRWg.jpeg"><figcaption>That’s me getting ready for the total solar eclipse, in a small town outside Nashville. Avoiding the crowds.</figcaption></figure><p id="3c6e">One of my first poems ever published on MuddyUm. Meant for spoken word performance, which I did a couple times. I had no clue what I was in for here on this platform.</p><div id="7f8a" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/nashville-eclipse-encounter-f545d5f9d747"> <div> <div> <h2>Nashville Eclipse Encounter</h2> <div><h3>I see you.</h3></div> <div><p></p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*UwCCXPVG1KN-AzVD-aXvKQ.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><p id="4a60">Earlier this year, I looked upwards and asked, “where are my mentors?” And they started to come out of the woodwork. Okay, not like apparitions or anything — the living, breathing kind.</p><p id="50b2">Then I asked the universe, how can I learn to do comedy, to be funny, to be a comedic writer? And nearly overnight, these funny people started to show up all around me. But I haven’t actually met any of them. Are they real? Or are they bots? I don’t know. I just know I’m laughing a whole lot more, ever since they appeared. And now I get to own and edit a funny publication called MuddyUm. Be careful what you wish for.</p><p id="0acc">Since these people, or bots?, are so much more fun than a lot of other places and spaces I travel to, I decided that this year, I’ll throw myself the second ever birthday party! But this one will be here. On MuddyUm.</p><p id="cccd">It’s going to be a virtual birthday party. And you are all invited. So skip the Happy Birthday auto video that fbook creates. And just put a couple words into an electronic birthday card article that day. Starting at midnight Eastern New York time. I know some of you are time zone challenged, what with international date lines and all, <a href="undefined">Lisa Bolin</a>.</p><div id="7a98" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/five-ways-to-have-more-time-to-write-5f8f3eb1f18f"> <div> <div> <h2>Five Ways to Have More Time to Write</h2> <div><h3>The (satirical) guide to stealing time</h3></div> <div><p></p></div> </d

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iv> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*_ZqhYUf5ZO4KJMc0)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><p id="7498">I’ll be at a mountain house resort retreat that day. I’ll be reading and editing and publishing as fast as the laughs and guffaws will allow me to do.</p><p id="8d62">I’m sure all the guests around me in the dining hall will be wondering wtf is going on with that wack-a-doodle old lady sitting over in the corner, laughing her head off, all by herself.</p><p id="2399">I guarantee I’ll be having the best time of anyone in the joint.</p><p id="bd2f">Thanks for playing!</p><p id="ef5a">Now here’s the official listicle. For <a href="undefined">Justine Reed</a> and <a href="undefined">Kristi Keller</a>.</p><ul><li>*The official date of the birthday is November 6th. So’s you have a little time to come up with your masterpiece.</li><li>Hey, and if this turns out to be super fun, we can do it for other people’s birthdays, or special events too. Maybe we can even get MSM Corp. to put together a special package for the events! No one will want to miss it!</li><li>No testicles were harmed in the planning for this party.</li></ul><div id="97e1" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/take-advantage-of-the-new-muddyum-subliminal-message-system-to-increase-your-income-exponentially-4f63df4702b3"> <div> <div> <h2>Take Advantage of the New MuddyUm Subliminal Message System to Increase Your Income Exponentially</h2> <div><h3>Have you felt at a loss due to the new MuddyUm earning model? Have you already seen a significant drop in your income…</h3></div> <div><p></p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*JurWma5uL0J24diwksVuZQ.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><p id="c4ce"><i>Susan Brearley is a brilliant strategist, a published book author, writer, seasoned editor, essayist, occasional comedy writer, and an accidental poet. She is currently working on her second book, a murder mystery about an OCD detective, who’s been called a “young version of Monk”. She’s a retired systems engineer and salesperson from IBM, a serial entrepreneur, and a survivor of a stage 4 inflammatory breast cancer since 1995. She’s also working on her US Coast Guard Captain’s license, has her US Sailing keelboat certification, and is the creator and elder teacher of a new program, “VisionQuest” that mentors and teaches adults of all ages how to create the life they were born to live. She is currently based in the mid-Hudson Valley, New York.</i></p></article></body>

It’s A Party

It’s My Birthday — Soon

And I’ll Play If I Want To — You Can Too. Read to the End for Directions

Two years ago, I turned 60. And I threw a birthday party at my house.

Not really a huge party. I invited a few people, who came over, and we laughed, ate great food (I’m a kick-ass chef) and drank sake martinis — my favorite! We took funny photos and people brought cards and some even wrote poetry for me.

It was all very sweet.

I guess it’s a common thing for people to have birthday parties to mark the giant decade leaps.

I wouldn’t know really. It was the first time I ever had a birthday party.

Yep. I grew up not ever having had a birthday party. Even as a child.

You might think that’s sad. But honestly, it doesn’t feel like anything at all to me. I never really went to other people’s birthday parties either.

In fact, when The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt first came out, my son the Zen Master started watching it. He thought it was funny. He told me about it and I started watching it with him.

Conversations with a Zen Master

Modern Day Koan Musings #4

I agreed with his assessment on the funny meter. Mostly because it felt like someone had been studying my life secretly and figured out a way to make a funny show about it. And I could get a lot of laughs about that.

As soon as Kimmy Schmidt had her coming out party, I felt like someone finally got me. How did they know? There must have been more people like me coming out of their shires.

I love how the universe works. For me, at my age, I’ve finally gotten to the point where I ask the universe for something, and it appears! Almost instantly. Kind of like the magically delicious in Lucky Charms. Or maybe it’s that Westworld chip that they planted in my leg that keeps giving me reveries.

I’m telling you, this is why Pastafarians where colanders as headgear.

That’s me getting ready for the total solar eclipse, in a small town outside Nashville. Avoiding the crowds.

One of my first poems ever published on MuddyUm. Meant for spoken word performance, which I did a couple times. I had no clue what I was in for here on this platform.

Nashville Eclipse Encounter

I see you.

Earlier this year, I looked upwards and asked, “where are my mentors?” And they started to come out of the woodwork. Okay, not like apparitions or anything — the living, breathing kind.

Then I asked the universe, how can I learn to do comedy, to be funny, to be a comedic writer? And nearly overnight, these funny people started to show up all around me. But I haven’t actually met any of them. Are they real? Or are they bots? I don’t know. I just know I’m laughing a whole lot more, ever since they appeared. And now I get to own and edit a funny publication called MuddyUm. Be careful what you wish for.

Since these people, or bots?, are so much more fun than a lot of other places and spaces I travel to, I decided that this year, I’ll throw myself the second ever birthday party! But this one will be here. On MuddyUm.

It’s going to be a virtual birthday party. And you are all invited. So skip the Happy Birthday auto video that fbook creates. And just put a couple words into an electronic birthday card article that day. Starting at midnight Eastern New York time. I know some of you are time zone challenged, what with international date lines and all, Lisa Bolin.

Five Ways to Have More Time to Write

The (satirical) guide to stealing time

I’ll be at a mountain house resort retreat that day. I’ll be reading and editing and publishing as fast as the laughs and guffaws will allow me to do.

I’m sure all the guests around me in the dining hall will be wondering wtf is going on with that wack-a-doodle old lady sitting over in the corner, laughing her head off, all by herself.

I guarantee I’ll be having the best time of anyone in the joint.

Thanks for playing!

Now here’s the official listicle. For Justine Reed and Kristi Keller.

*The official date of the birthday is November 6th. So’s you have a little time to come up with your masterpiece.
Hey, and if this turns out to be super fun, we can do it for other people’s birthdays, or special events too. Maybe we can even get MSM Corp. to put together a special package for the events! No one will want to miss it!
No testicles were harmed in the planning for this party.

Take Advantage of the New MuddyUm Subliminal Message System to Increase Your Income Exponentially

Have you felt at a loss due to the new MuddyUm earning model? Have you already seen a significant drop in your income…

Susan Brearley is a brilliant strategist, a published book author, writer, seasoned editor, essayist, occasional comedy writer, and an accidental poet. She is currently working on her second book, a murder mystery about an OCD detective, who’s been called a “young version of Monk”. She’s a retired systems engineer and salesperson from IBM, a serial entrepreneur, and a survivor of a stage 4 inflammatory breast cancer since 1995. She’s also working on her US Coast Guard Captain’s license, has her US Sailing keelboat certification, and is the creator and elder teacher of a new program, “VisionQuest” that mentors and teaches adults of all ages how to create the life they were born to live. She is currently based in the mid-Hudson Valley, New York.