RELATIONSHIPS
It Was Only One Slap
A slap can mean a lot.
Neeru and Amit
My friend Neeru was in love. She asked for my advice. I told her that she must mind her temper before she decides to get engaged to her constant friend.
Neeru soon invited me to an evening dinner with her and her boyfriend Amit.
I was not too keen to go for a private dinner with them. I wanted to get out of it. I told her when she has some friends as well I would meet with them.
She was irritated with me. So I finally agreed to join them for dinner. She was very gracious and invited one other couple for dinner.
There were 5 of us for dinner. We had a wonderful connection and the evening went on very well.
Neeru and Amit get engaged
Neeru asked for my advice. I could not help but like Amit. I met him off and on with her. He was a very cool guy. I did not ever see him angry.
However, I knew Neeru’s ways and I warned her that if she did not mend her ways the marriage would turn out to be a disaster. Amit was the no-nonsense type and could never stand temperamental women.
I told her that she should not think even of marrying him unless she was ready to be cool like him.
Neeru did not accept that.
I became quite a regular at Amit and Neeru’s meetings. I gave more than one warning to Neeru but she did not listen to me.
Often she flew in a temper and they would not talk for a few days and would become friends again.
I knew Neeru was in her best spirits and did not show her ugly side completely to Amit.
Then one day she dropped a bomb.
“Amit and I are getting engaged. You will be receiving our card soon. We are planning to invite people in the close family and friend’s circle. Keep the date free.”
I did receive the engagement invitation and it was very well organized. I went to this joyous occasion. I raised a toast to them but in my mind, I was a little worried though I did not say anything.
Amit asked me what was bothering me and I just wished them both a very happy engagement.
I did tell him to take care of Neeru because she was not as cool as him and she was temperamental too. He smiled and all looked well.
Neeru and Amit are married
Soon after the engagement Neeru and Amit got married. They were a wonderful couple. It looked as though they were made for each other.
Amit was fun and so was Neeru. I enjoyed their company. Amit did tell me that Neeru flies off in a temper quite often and sometimes it was difficult to handle her.
Relationships are complex. They do not move in a straight line and there are a lot of adjustments required to make a marriage work.
In the beginning, it all seems well but scratch the surface and you can see that it is not an easy path.
I found them having a lot of disagreements. Each one was worse than the other.
Amit finally warned Neeru that he would leave if there was one more long argument between them as he could not stand fights.
The fights went on and one fine day, Amit decided to temporarily take a transfer to another city thinking that things would improve between them.
He opted for a project which would take 5–6 months to complete.
Their jobs were now in different towns and they met once in a while. Those were 6 peaceful months between them.
Amit returns after his project is completed
Now Amit’s project is over and he has come back home. At first, it was fine between them but the fights escalated again. Each time Amit would be quiet and move out of the scene.
One day when they were arguing, Neeru slapped Amit hard on his face.
Amit did not say anything. He picked up his bag and baggage and left never to return. He slapped a divorce case on her.
Neeru cried her heart out and came to me and said “It was only one slap. He left me for just one slap, this is not right. I pleaded with him but he does not want to give another chance even to me.”
She blamed him raw for not forgiving her.
When I spoke to Amit he said “It is not just one slap! It is a slap. I have forgiven her but I cannot forget the slap. I will not be able to live with her again. The shock and shame are too much to bear”
After 4 years of married life, they split.
What do you feel? Should Amit have given Neeru another chance?
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©Dr. Preeti Singh, 2023.
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