It Takes a Whole Lot of Courage Today
Week 47 of 52 prompts: What does it take courage for you to do or not to do?

Our world is going downhill if the future turns out how it’s looking.
Courage was something I used to do drugs to have. I couldn’t go dancing if I didn’t have a few drinks in me first. I couldn’t sleep with my partner unless I was drunk or had something in me. (These were not live-in partners.)
Back then it took a whole lot of liquid or drug courage to get me to do most things. I went through a group for addiction, and we all did a timeline of when we started using when we stopped, and when we got addicted. I learned that for most of my life, I had been using. From pre-teen until finally I stopped using when I was an adult.
So to do anything in life that took courage to do, you can see why I turned to other things to help me through the courage. I did not know another way. I was taught by watching my parents, then my older brother and older sister made me do drugs with them.
Having courage did not come with my own mind to deal with the situation. I had to figure out things when I was an adult and how to handle things without drugs or alcohol in my system.
For some courage may come easy, get up and call someone to set up an appointment to go see a new doctor. Call on a past bill worrying if I would get ashamed worse than I had been for getting behind… I had absolutely no courage. I still get bad anxiety before having to build up the courage to do things that need to be done. I am learning day by day. Admire all the ones that have the courage to just do, one day I will not hesitate to do things and be able to just do too.
