Isn’t it Time to Tackle Blondism?
Turns out, ageism isn’t the last acceptable prejudice
First, the Joke
Prejudice often rears its ugly head in the form of an innocent joke. This one was posted recently on Quora (in ALL CAPS, mind you):
A PLANE IS ON ITS WAY TO TORONTO WHEN A BLONDE IN ECONOMY CLASS GETS UP AND MOVES TO THE FIRST CLASS SECTION AND SITS DOWN.
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT WATCHES HER DO THIS AND ASKS TO SEE HER TICKET.
SHE THEN TELLS THE BLONDE THAT SHE PAID FOR ECONOMY CLASS AND THAT SHE WILL HAVE TO SIT IN THE BACK.
THE BLONDE REPLIES, “I’M BLONDE, I’M BEAUTIFUL, I’M GOING TO TORONTO AND I’M STAYING RIGHT HERE.”
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT GOES INTO THE COCKPIT AND TELLS THE PILOT AND THE CO-PILOT THAT THERE IS A BLONDE BIMBO SITTING IN FIRST CLASS, THAT BELONGS IN ECONOMY AND WON’T MOVE BACK TO HER SEAT.
THE CO-PILOT GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND TRIES TO EXPLAIN THAT BECAUSE SHE ONLY PAID FOR ECONOMY SHE WILL HAVE TO LEAVE AND RETURN TO HER SEAT.
THE BLONDE REPLIES, “I’M BLONDE, I’M BEAUTIFUL, I’M GOING TO TORONTO AND I’M STAYING RIGHT HERE.”
THE CO-PILOT TELLS THE PILOT THAT HE PROBABLY SHOULD HAVE THE POLICE WAITING WHEN THEY LAND TO ARREST THIS BLONDE WOMAN WHO WON’T LISTEN TO REASON.
THE PILOT SAYS, “YOU SAY SHE IS A BLONDE? I’LL HANDLE THIS, I’M MARRIED TO A BLONDE. I SPEAK BLONDE.”
HE GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND WHISPERS IN HER EAR, AND SHE SAYS, “OH, I’M SORRY,” AND GETS UP AND GOES BACK TO HER SEAT IN ECONOMY.
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT AND CO-PILOT ARE AMAZED AND ASKED HIM WHAT HE SAID TO MAKE HER MOVE WITHOUT ANY FUSS.
“I TOLD HER, ‘FIRST CLASS ISN’T GOING TO TORONTO.’”
Possibly because some of my best friends are blond and beautiful, I didn’t immediately get the joke. Then it made me mad.
Admittedly, I’m no angel. Last week, I repeated a joke that made fun of old people. But I also rail against ageism and try to be accountable. No ism should be acceptable. Ironically, blondism is aimed at a privileged population.
Note: I spell the word blond in this story, but I wondered whether it should be blonde, as in the above selection. Turns out, either is fine. If you want to know more, here’s the full story.
The Legend of the Dumb Blond
If you look up “blond stereotype” on Wikipedia, you’ll learn that
the first recorded “dumb blonde” was an 18th-century blonde French courtesan named Rosalie Duthé whose reputation of being beautiful and dumb, even in the literal sense of not talking much, inspired a play about her called Les Curiosités de la Foire (Paris 1775).
Later, thanks to the film industry, new stereotypes evolved: the “blond bombshell” (think Jean Harlow or Marilyn Monroe), which is only a tad better than labeling a woman an “ice-cold blond” (Grace Kelly, Eva Marie Saint).
Prejudice and name-calling of all kinds are fueled by hatred, ignorance, and jealousy. Blondism is but one example.
It’s as if blonds themselves think they’re hot stuff. Maybe some do and others don’t. But why deny them the “pride” of other marginalized groups?
My Life as a Recent Blond
Blonds don’t have more fun, as Clairol once claimed. I’ve been a blond for the last ten years or so. I do okay socially, but believe me, no one’s falling over himself to get a glimpse of me just because I’m blonde.
Perhaps it’s because my color is too “dirty.” Then again, it might be because I’m nearing 79!
I hasten to add that although it was I who brought my suddenly grey hairline to my hairdresser’s attention, it was she who made the decision to tamper. “Let me just lighten your hair a little.” To make the grey less obvious.
I’d known her for 30 years. I trusted her. A little became a little more and then a little more after that. Now I have that blond color that so many women of a certain age sport. Still, I walk around thinking of myself as a brunette.
Honestly, I didn’t know I read “blond,” until a department-store saleswoman said, “Oh, that color goes great with your blond hair.” No doubt, she had visions of selling me that blue sweater.
Stop Blondism, Folks!
The point of this rumination is not to protect me from the sting of blondism. I still don’t think of myself as a blond. Besides, as a Jew, a bisexual, and an old lady, who has time to worry about being blond?
No, I worry for others, blond by birth or choice, whom you might judge or reject.
Please look into your hearts. You have no reason to hate or fear blonds, even the beautiful ones. Especially if you’re someone who tries to protect the rights of others, join me now in a commitment to ending blondism.
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