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Abstract

/p><p id="85ed">It wouldn’t have stopped You leaving anyway Wouldn’t have made you care Enough to stay Grief to me has Always been for me alone I’ve always cried In bathrooms In closets Quiet places Anywhere I could be Alone</p><p id="21d3">So, now I’m telling you What you never knew I muted the phone When I was breaking down Held it to my belly While I screamed Dropped, weeping, To my knees While I removed Your pictures From my walls Cried heartfelt, Wrenching tears While stumbling Down those halls</p><p id="ab26">You only ever heard me Be terribly strong Isn’t it funny That was the illusion All along.</p><div id="15a6" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/pink-champagne-6f069ee378a5"> <div> <div> <h2>Pink Champagne</h2> <div><h3>My heart is a relic</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*OX0EG9ACVenKkf4F)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="e45c" class="link-block">

Options

   <a href="https://readmedium.com/forgiving-you-for-me-80ae59ca0487">
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            <h2>Forgiving You For Me</h2>
            <div><h3>A poem</h3></div>
            <div><p>medium.com</p></div>
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      <a href="https://readmedium.com/a-toast-to-what-once-was-and-is-no-longer-75950ba17b72">
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            <h2>A Toast To What Once Was — And Is No Longer</h2>
            <div><h3>For anyone who has loved and lost and learned to live again</h3></div>
            <div><p>medium.com</p></div>
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    </div><p id="6f40">© <a href="undefined">Crystal Jackson</a> 2022</p></article></body>

Invulnerable: Act II

The illusionist

It seems strange That you doubt The validity of grief Until I remember All the times I wept alone In my house on my own Laughing with you Between weeping Into a muted phone

When you left My voice on the line Was even And strong Like you leaving me Didn’t feel like the world Was wrong And I didn’t, And would never, Belong

I silenced the line Until I could speak Without my voice breaking Or shaking Until it was easy To make you believe I was fine A nightmare With no end in waking And no relief With time

Still, you couldn’t know What I never let you see What good would it do To show you When you stopped Loving me My tears were real But trusting you Would have been The end Of me

It wouldn’t have stopped You leaving anyway Wouldn’t have made you care Enough to stay Grief to me has Always been for me alone I’ve always cried In bathrooms In closets Quiet places Anywhere I could be Alone

So, now I’m telling you What you never knew I muted the phone When I was breaking down Held it to my belly While I screamed Dropped, weeping, To my knees While I removed Your pictures From my walls Cried heartfelt, Wrenching tears While stumbling Down those halls

You only ever heard me Be terribly strong Isn’t it funny That was the illusion All along.