Be Nice

Internet Etiquette for 9 Year Old’s

If only Mr. Rogers could be here to help us with this toughie

Good morning boys and girls, I am so glad that you are my neighbor and that you are here with me today!

Today we are going to talk about a topic that is so important that I am not even going to sing my opening number; although it is a beautiful day to be neighbors.

Let me finish tying my indoor shoes.

There we go! Now let’s talk about etiquette. Eh — teh — kit. Eh — teh — kit. That’s a hard word to say, isn’t it boys and girls? And, for some people, it is even harder to do.

So, what is etiquette? Eh — teh — kit. Sounds so funny doesn’t it?

Etiquette is actually really simple to do. It is just a fancy way to say “Nice”. We all know what that is, right boys and girls?

We all know how important it is be nice to one another. You like it when people are nice to you, right? And it makes us sad or hurt, or maybe angry when people aren’t nice to us. Doesn’t it?

So, that is why we always try and be nice to others. We don’t want them to feel sad or hurt. And we don’t want them to not be nice to us and make us sad, do we?

Have you ever been sad? It’s not very fun, is it?

Etiquette is the thing that makes us be nice to one another. We use etiquette because we all know how crummy it feels when other people don’t use it.

Etiquette can be a little bit complicated, so let’s draw some pictures. We love to draw, don’t we boys and girls?

Let’s say that you draw a picture of a bunny.

It is a really cute bunny and you love it; so, you show the picture to one of your friends. Your friend doesn’t really like bunnies though, he likes turtles.

Your friend tells you that bunnies are dumb and that it is an ugly picture. That hurts your feelings and you feel sad. Your friend didn’t use etiquette. He wasn’t nice.

So, you draw another bunny, like this one:

This time, even though your friend still thinks turtles are better than bunnies, he says that he really likes the bunny’s smile.

This time the friend used etiquette. He didn’t change his opinion about bunnies, but he found something nice to say about your drawing.

Do you see how someone chooses to express their feelings about something can make you feel different things? When we make people feel good when we express our opinion, that is using etiquette.

We don’t have to like bunnies. We don’t have to like drawing. We don’t even have to like the person. But we can always choose to say something that makes people feel good. See how that works?

One thing we didn’t talk about though, boys and girls, is how you reacted when your friend told you that he liked the bunny’s smile. You can use also use etiquette when people express their opinion. Not just when you are looking at pictures of bunnies or turtles.

When your friend told you he liked the bunny’s smile, did you say, “thank you”? If you didn’t say something positive and nice back to your friend, then you forgot to use etiquette.

What happens when we don’t use etiquette? That’s right! Nice job, you are getting it! When we don’t use etiquette, we make people feel sad, or hurt or angry. That’s bad.

So, what do we do boys and girls? We say thank you or smile or say something nice about their turtle drawing.

When we do this, we create something called a positive feedback loop. Don’t worry about what that is, boys and girls. We can make Positive Feedback Loop our Phrase of the Day next week. Let’s just say that when you are nice to other people, they are nice back — and that makes you feel good.

So, you are feeling so good that you are inspired to draw another bunny, like this:

This one is your best bunny ever, and it is so cute and fluffy! And it even has a pink little nose and his own carrot! You are sure your friend is going to love this bunny because it is so special. So, you show your friend.

Your friend glances at the bunny for only one second (because he is probably busy drawing a turtle) and says that this bunny has a nice smile too. Huh. How does that make you feel boys and girls? Your friend still used etiquette though, didn’t he?

It’s just that you don’t feel quite as happy as last time he said the same thing. And this time you worked extra hard on your bunny.

But, remember, we still have an opportunity to say something back. Which thing do you think we should say?

“Yeah, well turtles are stupid.”

– or –

“Thank you, I worked really hard on it.”

That is a tough one. Let me give you a hint boys and girls, you can’t ever go wrong when you use etiquette.

The first one will surely make your friend feel sad or hurt, right? So, we should choose the second one and try to be positive to our friend. We might even be proactive (Word of the Day, week after next) and point out that we see how hard he is working on his turtle drawing too.

After all, you both have a lot in common because you like drawing.

See how etiquette works boys and girls? It is really easy to be nice.

Etiquette is a hard word to learn though. That is why I want you to go and explain all of this to your parents.

Tell them Mr. Rogers says that they need to learn how to use etiquette on the internet. They will know what you mean, even if they are still learning how to do it.

Won’t you be my neighbor?

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Timothy Key spent over 26 years in the fire service as a firefighter/paramedic and various fire chief management roles. He firmly believes that bad managers destroy more than companies, and good managers create a passion that is contagious. Compassion, grace and gratitude drive the world; or at least they should. Follow me on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter, and join the mail list.