“It’s Not Me, It’s You” A Reminder That Writing is All About the Reader.

We’ve all heard the phrase that’s been around for so long that it might just be too old for a Meme (but should be one).

“I’m sorry. But it’s not you, it’s me”.

Hopefully, you haven’t had this sentence said to you (I have), but if you have you know it can be a crushing beginning or final sentence to the ‘dumpee’ in a relationship that is about to end.

It’s the moment in which the sun in your intertwined planets (your relationship) is about to go supernova and explode.

‘Ka-boom’!

But my message to you isn’t that at all. It’s the opposite.

I’m not splitting up with you but like the ‘dumper’ in the above scenario,

I’m helping you.

I’m helping us.

I’m helping this platform.

One of my favourite writers on Medium is Darius Foroux. He once recently said “Writing is Thinking”

The weight and meaning of that statement didn’t hit me at first. It sounded like a philosophical line that like many, went over my head.

But it wasn’t until I discovered after a couple of months into writing that he was right. He nailed it. He nailed it because after writing for a while, a strange thing happens.

You run out of events in your life worth writing about. All those things at the top of your mind are now out. Done…How can you be a writer if you’ve run out of things to write about?

And that’s where Darius hits that proverbial nail on the head.

The ‘strange thing’ that happens, is the rusty ‘ol wheels of your brain start turning in a new way. Your brain stops functioning simply to keep you functioning. To guide you to eat, drink, shower, and turn on Netflix.

Your brain is now thinking on a deeper level. It’s directing your eyes to look for more things around you for stories. It’s enticing your consciousness to be more aware, and for your soul to wake up that muscle of enthusiasm that’s been dormant for so long.

“Writing is thinking” (thank you again Darius Foroux!)

Writing 100 Articles in 2 Months

I admit that I’m still a newbie. ‘A pledge’ if you will, and very willing to go through the hazing and hardships of doing what it takes to make it.

I’m now writing for the love of it and I’m writing not because I have a lot to say. I’m writing because I have a lot to share. I’m writing to get to a point in life where my writing is ‘my crust’ or livelihood. I want it to be my crust because it’s my love. And I love my crust!

When I first started writing seriously (which is less than 2 months ago and hard to believe), I was writing all about the things that had gone on in my life that had happened.

At 53, there were a few things for sure. And it kept me busy!

Whether it was Nighttime at the dinner table, at work during lunch, or dictating on my phone as I went on walks, I was blurting it all out.

“The Readers will love it right!?” I thought to myself.

I’ve written over 100 articles in less than 2 months. Some are good, some not so good, and some that readers think are great (thank you! :)).

But it wasn’t until only the last dozen pieces or so that I realized that I had switched for whom I’d been writing.

At first, it was me me me. I wanted to get all these things and experiences out and hoped you’d enjoy them too.

The Moment of Change

I had been writing a lot, and writing about worthy topics, but somehow either naturally or subconsciously, I shifted the focus of to whom I was writing for.

It was no longer about me, it was about you.

This doesn’t mean that it was a 180 change. My writing style and my topics are still mostly anecdotal. It’s just now that I write them not for the sake of getting something out or having a cathartic experience, I write them with you, the reader in mind.

To me, that‘s what writing it’s about (the reader).

That for me, is my Ikigai which is what gets me up in the morning (or sometimes middle of the night!).

So no matter what you are writing, just remember.

“It’s not me, it’s you”.

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