I’m Not Just Some Bisexual Woman Who Owns A Dog
I am rescued by one over and over again
A brand new morning greets us. Jernee whines in her crate, anxious to escape her home to begin the day. Autumn rushed in without fair warning, and we are now chasing after morning walks while adhering to a much more brisk pace. We fight the wind at every angle. I look down at my four-legged savior, and she flaunts her fierce walk far better than I could ever accomplish.
She is my personal balm in Gilead. With every judgment that comes my way from naysayers and the fake-righteous, I think of her. Without knowing — without being prompted about what to do, she can turn an extremely dark moment in my life into one bathed in the brightest light.
If we had the hearts of animals, how would we operate? We as human beings could stand to learn a wealth of knowledge from them by simply witnessing their actions.
If I’ve had a bad day, she senses it. If I am crying, she hops into my lap to help soothe my pain. If I am made furious by a loved one, she huffs in my direction as if she will lay down the law toward that person.
She has not given up on me yet, and during these times — during the most vicious endeavors pursued by those willing to meet their cases at the highest level of court, I am thankful she is still alive.
Why do some people choose who they’ll serve when they say they are Christians?
What is off in their brains to cause someone to stand “flat-footed” in front of others and vocalize that they love people (i.e., All God’s children), but … There should never be a “but.” The moment this conjunction has been inserted into the conversation is the moment my listening ears are on cue.
You can’t have apple pie without apples.
In an article from The Conversation, a graphic artist by the name of Lorie Smith contends that offering website design services to same-sex couples would be an affront to her First Amendment rights.
Smith is generally willing to serve LGBTQ clients. However, she intends to begin designing wedding websites and is unwilling to create them for same-sex couples, saying it would go against her Christian beliefs.
Under Colorado’s Anti-Discrimination Act, though, it is discriminatory and illegal to refuse services to someone based on “disability, race, creed, color, sex, sexual orientation, marital status, national origin, or ancestry.”
My brain is having trouble making sense of the phrase, “Smith is generally willing to serve LGBTQ clients” when it is immediately followed by the fact that she is unwilling (not can’t be persuaded, not unable to do it, and not against it totally, but unwilling) to create websites for same-sex couples.
In the same state, just four years ago, there was a baker, Jack Phillips, who took this same route stating he would not serve/provide services for same-sex couples because of religious beliefs, and the First Amendment came into play along with this.
Denying someone a wedding cake (and yourself the potential money to be made from crafting it) says a lot about the person and less about the same-sex couple, especially when “religion” is tossed into the equation.
2022 is continuing to unleash the hounds on all of us in a way that is disturbing and heartbreaking, and I find myself on some days, at my wits’ end.
I have a dog who rescues me repeatedly.
And knowing this, I can push forward every day. I can breathe easier, reminded of the fact that she calms me — loves me unconditionally. The world around me is a dumpster-fire floating on hurricane waters, and I am trying my best to hang on, especially when I learn that …
4 in 10 books banned in 2022 are LGBTQ+-Related. A new report found that more than 1,600 books have been banned in over 5,000 schools this year. — Abby Monteil, September 20, 2022
What are they so afraid of? How can we strip the youth of knowledge and learning in different ways about all human beings who make up our world and then expect them to be able to effectively maneuver in and around the same world when they are finally old enough?
Children are being set up to fail before they even have a chance at trying. And why? Fear? Pride? The want to be right? Could it be a combination of all these things?
I read article after article both on Medium and away from this platform, and on most days, I am pushed down a beaten path and my energy is drained from me.
It is a hard pill to swallow knowing you are someone people would rather not know about — learn about — want their children around. This form of knowledge does something to the heart that’s unspeakable, yet Jernee is always there.
I reach for her, and her fur slips into the palm of my hand, and I stroke just behind her ear to show her my affection. It is always returned in full measure.
I wouldn’t want to do time in this world without her.
And I know the time will come when I will have to say “goodbye” to Jernee, and make peace with the reality of life ending in death, but today, thankfully, is not that day.
I am holding on to the beauty of her love for as long as I can and as hard as I can. I am not just some bisexual woman who owns a dog; I have one who saves me every single day without fail.
Knowing this helps me face the days ahead willingly.
Knowing this opens up my heart to the possibilities of this world changing before I take my last breath.
I hope, I am right.
©2022 Tremaine L. Loadholt
This story is a response to the Prism & Pen writing prompt, Queer Family Pets: Comfort During Calamity?