I Transformed Myself for my Children

Awakening to Action — A Parent’s Path to Self-Improvement

Lazy, procrastination, late coming, inactive, negligence — some of the traits which I have been described with right from my childhood till I became a father.

I was sick of hearing the word ‘lazy’ from all my teachers at each parent-teachers’ meeting. It became so common that I literally thought — yeah, for those students whom teacher doesn’t have a complaint, she will use such words to describe. I stopped bothering myself and continued in the same stand.

In engineering, when my attendance was low, mainly because of lack of self-interest, my friend warned me — you may continue this in your job as well. I answered — I would be completely different at my job, when it warrants.

As my friend predicted, this behaviour continued into my job wherein I was late to my job on a daily basis. I never faced any resistance from management as I was competent at my work, despite not having much experience in my job. But deep down, I knew how I procrastinated on things that needed my attention and how I could have been better.

Years passed, call it fate, God or luck, I found myself with decent financial stability through my investments.

My kids were doing fine in their primary school, and life was running smoothly, with the usual ups and downs. Some hiccups come and go in everyone’s life. They visited in my life too, which did not bother me much. My habits persisted.

However, a recent incident hit me hard.

At a recent parent-teacher meeting, I heard similar comments about my elder kid. The words used were different, but they reminded me of my own shortcomings.

I initially reacted with being upset with the school, my kid, then my wife, and everything which God presented me with.

I did not like it. I did not like it at all.

This made me think as to how the situation can be improved.

It was as if a mirror was put in front of me, showing a reel of my past to the present.

I realized that I needed to change and set an example for my kids

There were several occasions I had tried to change in the past.

Once, right after my exams in middle school years, even before results got declared, I was unhappy with my performance. After getting back home, on the evening of my last exam day, I gathered all my books at one place and commenced reading. But my motivation faded in few days when I saw my other friends enjoying their time off.

Another time, during my engineering days, I was rigorously preparing for my exams with a strict routine. Being a bachelor, had all time in the world to study. Waking up in early hours, studying through out the day, I was working hard. The only other engagement I had was that I was taking tuitions for children with utmost sincerity — which earned me a good name and some pocket money. But a dispute with a parent of one of my students disrupted my routine and everything fell apart. It was just a one time tiff, but it dragged my mind so much into it, that I gave up. Not sure, how one is related to the other and why I was so immature.

These were just two of my half-hearted attempts. I pondered over them. What made me fail? Was it a lack of motivation? Why couldn’t I be consistent? Were my actions too strict? Did I set unachievable goals? Did I give up too early?

This time, I was determined to succeed, driven by a strong reason — my children.

I realized that to be a good father, I needed to actively work on improving their future.

This realization ignited a fire within me.

When a burning desire for change comes from within, it motivates you to do your best.

It was time to kickstart changes in my lifestyle, attitude. I started listening to great inspirational talks by the late Jim Rohn.

I established and began following a strict ‘Transformational Routine’ that I had never adhered to before.

I started preparing myself.

Usually, I would often leave late for the office , and my kids would head to school when I was busy in bathroom with my daily chores. On the first day of my transformation, with my early wake-up, I ensured to provide a helping hand to my wife in making children ready. Had great conversations with my kids while making them ready.

My younger kid, with a pleasant smile, asked me— “Daddy, just like today can you help us ready every morning so that we can have nice talk like this?”

I was flabbergasted.

I continued my transformational routine everyday.

All the outcomes were remarkable.

Outcome

• Respect among peers, especially from juniors, has grown due to my punctuality (most of the times)
• New enthusiasm started brewing with dusting off and re-commencing my favourite subjects and projects
• Staying abreast of latest news in the fields of my interest
• My language learning received a boost making me more confident
• Colorful stickers in the house and various new learning methods I adopted, intrigued my elder kid
• Less TV & more books encouraged kids to bring their books to the table
• Interaction with family improved, making kids open up more
• Regular exercise and early eating boosted my confidence. Kids started following suit.
• Kids began waking up happily thanks to a strict bedtime routine
• Last but not least, our health improved

Given the above outcomes, I became committed to maintaining consistency, prioritizing what’s essential, and never giving up.

Cheers !