I Post My Nudes on Social Media

An erotic photojournal documenting my experiment in sexual empowerment and exhibitionism

Have you ever shared erotic photos of your body on the internet for public consumption? Either very scantily clad or fully nude?

It’s inherently risky. It’s showy and bold. And if you don’t follow the rules just so — it can even be dangerous.

And I get off on the thrill.

I would go so far as to say: it makes me feel sexually empowered as a woman.

I would also go so far as to say it’s increased my sometimes low libido — making me feel like more of a hungry, attractive, wanton, sexual being. A creature who jumps on her unsuspecting (and lucky) husband out of nowhere.

More Than An Attention Whore

I always aim for honesty and authenticity for my readers. So I’m not going to hide the fact that yes, getting attention is a part of why I post photos.

As a woman who struggles with sometimes feeling neglected, invisible, and starved for attention despite the fact that she gives it often, sharing erotically charged photos of my body can make me feel attractive and desired.

I’ve struggled with an eating disorder. I’m currently flirting with alcoholism. And I wrestle with a poor body image and weight gain due to these food/booze addictions that are negatively impacting my health both physically and mentally.

I’m pretty self-aware, and I know that sharing my photos boosts my body confidence. I can look at them and feel sexy and love my curves.

At the same time, I can admit that I don’t love all my curves. I don’t love the unhealthy quarantine weight gain that I’ve experienced since the photo below was taken. And I’m very aware that I hide or crop certain parts of a photo that highlight bothersome areas.

But I don’t think of careful placement and posing as hating on or hiding my imperfections. I think of it as a way to highlight and display the parts of myself that let me feel beautiful.

However, sharing nude or scantily clad photos is about more than getting likes and comments. There’s a psychological benefit for me that comes from being in control of the parts of my sexuality that I choose to show.

This isn’t the disturbing experience of walking down the street and being verbally harassed by someone about my outfit. It’s not like when I’m out with my friends at a bar, feeling panicked when a stranger’s hand gropes my ass without my consent.

I’m showing what I want, when I want, the way that I want — period. I approve what gets seen or doesn’t. I’m in charge of my own erotic photojournal, and it’s a wonderful, lustful, heady feeling.

Doing this also gives me an outlet for my love of photography. Even though I know next to nothing about it and I’m highly amateur, I love to experiment with it — and I find erotic photography both creatively fulfilling and sexually exciting.

I’ve also enlisted the help of others to take photos of me, and let me tell you, that’s a whole other level. Modeling naked or nearly naked for someone else is more difficult.

I feel far more nervous and self-conscious when it’s not just me and my camera.

But that’s also part of the thrill.

And there’s still an element of control knowing I’m in charge of the session, and what goes out into the world or what gets deleted is completely up to me.

Working Up From Lots Of Skin To Nudes

It took me quite some time to work up to sharing a fully naked photograph. I never considered myself much of an exhibitionist. But then I started a public blog about my sexual journey — past, present, and what I fantasize about doing in the future.

I started learning a lot about myself sexually. Both by writing my own stories and reading those of others. I also started spending a little more time on social media to promote my work, and I admired some of the women out there who were posting beautiful pictures of their bodies.

Always curious, I wondered why they did it. Attention, maybe money. That may be why a lot of people do it, but, as I’ve explained, it goes deeper than that for many of us.

When I decided to share my naked breasts for the first time, I politely warned Twitter with a post about my decision the day before.

Honestly, most people follow sex writers for the writing, and not to be unexpectedly eye-assaulted by nude photos. (Or maybe I’m wrong?) Either way, I thought it would be best to give people a chance to unfollow.

After getting some kind encouragement, I posted one of my bathtub selfies, followed later by a black-and-white photo of me, up close and personal and topless, in bed.

The thing I love about Twitter is, when the photo is larger, you don’t see the whole thing unless you expand the image. I like that building anticipation when I tap my screen, which then goes from a preview to a full image.

I recently posted another bathtime selfie with just the slightest peek of my pubic mound between my legs — something I didn’t see myself being comfortable with at first, but that I now feel bold and unapologetic about.

A person’s intimate body parts are no longer shameful to me, as I felt they were when I was younger. They are truthful and hold a unique beauty, no matter the gender.

On my social channels, I see bodies of all shapes and sizes and genders posed for photos in various states of undress.

They are all unique and beautiful in their own way. There are filters and editing, sure. But playing with color and light is part of the fun and intrigue.

There’s also a business angle that motivates me to post. Of course, there is. Maybe this will grab the eyes of readers, who might then be curious enough to check out the stories behind the body. Maybe my writing will generate more income.

For me, there’s no shame in admitting that. I’m a working mom. I’m trying to provide a better life for me and my family. Money is a thing, and I don’t see an issue with that, as long as I’m happy and fulfilled in expressing my art.

I Post Safely And Anonymously

As a sex and relationships writer who started publishing a year and a half ago, I became more and more tempted to dip my own toes into the water of exhibitionism as I got more sexually adventurous.

By not showing my face and taking careful photos at the sexiest angles possible, I felt comfortable allowing readers and followers to see the woman behind the words.

Yes, there’s a person here — even if you don’t see all of her physically, you can see lots of her body and even more of her mind. And that’s because she chooses to give it.

I write about my true sexual experiences and my dark fantasies in explicit detail, and to protect my identity and the identities of those close to me, anonymity is not just recommended — it’s absolutely necessary.

So I abide by a set of rules.

1. Protect your identity at whatever level necessary.

Unfortunately in this day and age, putting myself out there and being transparent in my pursuit of pleasure and sexual fulfillment is still taboo.

In some cases, it might be downright detrimental to my family or career, so a pen name is necessary. So is keeping the majority of my face out of my social media. And creating separate social accounts just for my pen name.

Anonymity is necessary for safety, especially when it comes to my family, my child, and my corporate office job.

But I’d be lying if I denied that being a good little corporate copywriter by day and a secretive, sexually expressive temptress by night wasn’t a huge turn-on for me…

2. Be mentally prepared for negative responses and vicious trolls.

When you put yourself out there, whether it’s through your writing or photos, you have to know yourself enough to know if you can take a critical or even malicious response. I always share online with the understanding that I’m inviting the possibility for negative reactions.

Some people may have constructive criticism.

Others might be straight-up assholes, trying to hurt a complete stranger’s feelings over the internet just for their regular Tuesday night fun.

That doesn’t mean I have to agree with them — or let them shut me up.

I won’t lie and say it doesn’t get to me sometimes, but I’ve built up a far thicker skin than I used to have. Plus, the bulk of my experience has been incredibly positive in the kind and encouraging sex writing community. And so I keep pursuing my passion.

3. Don’t do it for the wrong reasons.

Don’t share yourself because you feel pressured to do so. And don’t share yourself for others.

This next bit is incredibly important to me: I do this for myself and my own fulfillment — not for anyone else.

Continuing My Erotic Photo Projects

I understand that writing and reading about explicit sex is not everyone’s cup of tea. And not everyone appreciates erotic illustrations or photography like I do.

I think that’s completely okay, and I wouldn’t judge anyone for not being into it.

But I most definitely am! In fact, I’d like to take it further.

One of the creative projects I want to take on is a professional boudoir photo shoot. One that involves a talented fine art photographer, lots of gorgeous lingerie, and yes, even my tastefully nude female form.

I’m starting my research and would love to hear from anyone who’s had a good experience with such things.

When I hopefully get that project under my belt, you know I’ll of course be happy to share.

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This story is part of Sexual Espresso, a weekly column published here at Sexual Tendencies.

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