GIFTS & PRESENTS | BIRTHDAYS AND CHRISTMAS

I Might Sound Like the Grinch

But I don’t like gifts, and here is why

Author’s Note

Yesterday, I was working on a prompt by Ruby Noir on motivation, praise, and criticism. Halfway through the prompt guidelines, she switched the subject to gifts.

I don’t know why, nor am I that interested in pondering it at the time I’m writing this. She says everything she does is for a reason. I’d say I’m reasonable enough, but I don’t always follow reason.

So I decided to split this prompt in two, hijack it, and adapt it to my own views and ruminations.

“When choosing a gift for someone what are the factors involved?”

I don’t know. I’m usually going blind about it. It’s a good thing that I don’t have that many people who I need to buy gifts for. Most of them are very close people, so I base my gifts on their hobbies or vices.

That’s what troubles me when it comes to gifts. Since I can’t relate much to the idea itself, I’m having trouble seeing its importance.

During my childhood, I was more or less seriously accused of being too spoiled by my parents because of my inability to act excited when receiving their gifts.

That’s hilarious, since I was never a pretentious or demanding kid. But one neighboring kid who would jump around and brag about his gift even if he were to get a dog shit in a box made the contrast even more unfavorable for me.

That just wasn’t me, and it still isn’t. I find gifts a social obligation. If someone I know needs something and I can help them, I would. But that’s called helping people out. And you don’t need a reason or a fixed date for it.

Waiting for a specific date just so we can quantify each other’s love and appreciation through something that seems more like courtesy and platitude is not something that I can relate to.

Sadly, most people don’t think like me, and I don’t want to be the odd person standing out. So I engage in this practice.

But there’s a part of me that dislikes making the one who gifts me something as uncomfortable as I am. I know it’s not true, but that is what I can relate to. That’s half the reason why I don’t like receiving gifts either.

“What motivates you more in terms of a gift — sentimental value or monetary value?”

I don’t require much. And by the time the occasion came for me to receive a gift (birthdays or Christmas), I would have already bought whatever I needed.

As a kid, even if I wasn’t super excited about it, I would consider it a nice gesture since I could not afford things. But as an adult, I have my own money. Most of the gifts I would get are useless to me.

Outside of a social setting, I’m a minimalist. And I like my own things. I’ll use the same phone until it breaks, even if I get a new one as a gift. I would choose my own Samsung A12 over the last model of iPhone (as a gift) in a heartbeat.

I’m not materialistic, which is why I would treasure the product of my own labor (the Samsung I bought). But I would rather receive money as a gift.

Let’s be fair; everyone has a budget they set aside for gifts. I don’t care whether it’s $10 or whatever; give me the money instead. That way, it won’t be a waste of the gift.

I’d rather have something with sentimental value, but that’s not easy either. The greatest gifts are love, respect, appreciation, and support — being there for me in case I need you.

Looking around and being blessed with such people all the time, not just during Christmas or my birthday, is the best sentimental gift I can receive.

“Are you more likely to give a gift that took a lot of time and effort or cost a lot of money and had shock and awe appeal? Does this vary by the gift recipient?”

I don’t think that people usually gift things that are super expensive unless they are life-changing for the ones who receive them or they have a good financial situation themselves.

When it comes to giving something, I have the tendency to do so more off-season. In season, I usually just go for something decent, not too expensive. I think about what the person might like, buy it, gift it, and wash my hands off it.

Off-season, I’m just trying to be considerate. If I have a friend who is in between jobs or on social benefits, I would usually treat them to something. I would pay for the drinks, pizza, and finger food, or the check at the pub.

Sure, I won’t spend a lot, but it’s still an extra cost that I don’t mind. Instead of them feeling like they can’t hang out because they can’t afford it, I will reach out.

I’ll even lie and say I won a small lottery ticket or a sports bet to make them feel better and not think of my gesture as pity. I found out they tend to accept the proposal more if I use a small celebration as an excuse.

But I don’t consider this a gift. I hate gifts.

Deep Thought December Prompts by Ruby Noir, Prompt #2 — Part 2

Britt H., Susan Christiana, Dixie Dodd, NancyO, Lisa Guard, William Michael Williamson, Dave Gottlieb, Karen Schwartz, Katy Lin, Mariana Busarova, Lynn L. Alexander, Paula Shablo, Bruce Coulter, Jason Edmunds, Julia A. Keirns, TzeLin Sam, Sweet Honeylu, Tori Hall Sudduth, Jenny Gargarello, Shanti C K, Brenda Arledge, Johnny Poitras, Thomas Sturgeon Jr., Coralie Brébec, Sophia Tell- Stories 🤓📢🤓, Saeed Sobhani, The LARO ✨✨, Lea Bardot.