I Know You’ve All Had Enough of This Damn Topic. I Haven’t!

Here we go again!

For a very long time, I keep singing the anthem of self-care. It’s like a broken record. However, it’s because it is not a topic that can be discounted.

I also talked about how self-care practices change. The principles are the same, but there is an adjustment on a case-by-case basis. As always, I’ll personalize it.

Two months ago (mid-April), I started having migraine attacks. This was odd cos I hadn’t had one for a very long time. It’s not only that it wasn’t quickly abortive, but I was having about three in a week. Only sleep worked in aborting each migraine attack. And, yes, I started skipping work. One obvious culprit: We were short-staffed at work.

Many times, I prevent these migraines with an anti-inflammatory diet and abort acute attacks with Tylenol. Well, I had been skipping my daily anti-inflammatory- the veggie smoothie. That created a deficit in the face of a very stressful life situation. The deficit was building, waiting to hit the ceiling.

Now weekends are my catch-up days for sleep and relaxation. The 2-day weekend was not enough anymore. A long weekend was more like it. I turned down so many requests to visit friends and families. Not exactly an excellent choice.

It was like shooting myself in the foot. Some of those visits might have rewired my brain. Instead, I used that time to sleep, cook, shop, Netflix, and be my version of Wifey. This weekend therapy usually worked if the stress level was sub-optimal. It wasn’t. I postponed my exams. I had no choice. Stress had fried my brain.

Hubby had sounded alarm bells in April with the migraine attacks. I wasn’t sure he realized he could also take action. I would come home and be so apathetic. Soon after, I’ll zone off. The next morning, the same cycle would start.

Then one day, I told my boss I would start resuming late. It became a habit. I was gradually thinning the hours. We were still short-staffed. The times I showed up at work, at first things seemed okay and then later, the cracks showed; disorganization, poor concentration, yelling, and irritation.

Next, I skipped an entire day of work. Then I came to work the next day and did suboptimal work. Then I called in sick again. The boss knew something was up. He was not sure what it was.

My gynecologist had asked me to make an appointment on the third week of May 2023. I did not keep the appointment cos my period had bailed on me. It was only when my mental health took the hit I realized the missed period was a consequence. My whole system had taken a beating.

Right now, I am on an extended vacation cos too many things have gone wacko. My last vacation was a year ago. I am going to be treating anemia, and malnutrition, and nursing my mental health back to life.

Taylor Swift once sang that band-aids don’t fix bullet holes. She’s right. This bullet hole needs debriding, cleaning, and revitalization. There really is no rush…

Thanks to Chelsea Marie.

Update 26th July 2023: I have since resumed work. What has changed? In the office, my boss employed more hands. They are temps and would go back to school in September. Their presence means a lot. I am less tired after work and I train and delegate. We are already discussing replacements after they go away but have not firmed up on that yet.