I Dated a Girl Who Nursed Sperm Donors

I met Jennifer at the Sperm Donor clinic.

I used to come there every month for the free porn magazines they provided. After one month, I’d worn out the magazine and needed some new inspiration, so I came back to the clinic.

Jennifer was amazingly kind; she should have worked with kids, but, as she used to say, “grown-up men are so much more childish than sick kids.”

I liked her sense of humor. There was always some truth behind it. Also, she had beautiful small boobs. That’s how our relationship started, in my head. I often masturbated to her voice and boobs while in the booth.

At first, it was enough. I was used to living in my head, too awkward to talk with people in real life. But my feelings grew. I started masturbating to her at home. At one point, I even stopped taking the magazines from the clinic.

There could be only one reason; I was falling in love.

I had limited dating experience at the time, so to start the conversation, I asked her if she liked this month’s porn magazine. Luckily, she thought I was joking. “I didn’t have time to read it yet, but I heard good things about the brunette on page 23. Some donors said she looks a bit like me.”

Even I understood she was flirting with me.

I couldn’t help but do my little alligator dance. The one I always do when I win at Super Mario Kart or during bingo Sunday afternoons with Grandma. Jennifer laughed. “You’re too cute, I guess you’ll be done before I end my shift today, but maybe we could go to the ball tomorrow night?”

“I’d love that! See you there,” I replied, grabbing the porn magazines and heading for the booth. Realizing it could be misinterpreted, I added, blushing, “I mean, at the dance, not in the booth.”

In fact, I saw her in the booth.

She was all I could think of. Her gorgeous boobs were everywhere I looked. Two minutes later, I was done. But I stayed in there for ten more minutes. I didn’t want her to think I suffered from premature ejaculation.

The next day, before coming to the ball, I masturbated twice, to be sure. The music didn’t go well with my little alligator routine, but I was a good twist and rock and roll dancer, so we had fun. Enough for a good night kiss as I walked her back to the studio apartment she had inherited from her grandparents.

And enough for a second date.

We became a couple. I was the happiest man on the planet. I made her laugh, and I knew how to cook sexy scrambled eggs; that was more than enough for Jennifer. She always was the reasonable one in our relationship. She knew how to differentiate needs from desires. It was harder for me.

Quickly, I became possessive. I was jealous of all the other sperm donors seeing her at the clinic and likely masturbating to her beautiful boobs as I had before. I didn’t want to share her. I told her she should quit her job.

She listened to me with patience and empathy. She was kind like that. She asked me how she could leave a job she loved. Helping others get children was all she ever wanted to do. She also wanted children herself, but it was still too early for this discussion.

“But I’m scared to lose you; I’m scared one of the sperm donors will start hitting on you.”

“Don’t you trust me?”

“I do. I do! But I’m scared.”

“Well, you need to think about that on your own. Maybe it’s better if you spend the night at your place.”

Back home, drinking a beer at my kitchen table, I replayed our conversation in my head. Jennifer’s words made me realize I might already be a father without knowing. Biologically speaking. It made me rethink my whole sperm donor engagement. I had given my spermatozoids, and other people had treated them with care and love, hoping for the best.

It was the same for Jennifer and me; we had given each other our trust and love. It was my duty to have faith in her. Why would she cheat on me with another donor?

The next morning I walked her to the clinic.

“You’re not scared anymore?” Jennifer asked.

“I am, but you gave me your trustozoids, it’s my duty to treat them with care and love.”

“Trustozoids! You’re so weird sometimes! I love you!”

We’ve been walking together for twenty-four years now.

Smillew is a Medium artist who writes about love, his Medium newsletter, and his Medium referral link. No need to follow him; he’ll show up in your feed.