How to Take Your Power Back in The Simplest of Ways
For the longest time, I had been notorious for letting people walk all over me. Of course, I got upset about it. And, of course, I caused my own pain one too many times. Let’s explore the simplest techniques and light-coding to help you take your power back and help everyone involved.
What helped me leverage myself into my authentic self and stop getting walked on? Boundaries. Yup, boundaries. Everyone’s heard of them, but not many know which ones to set or how to set them. It is also extremely common to feel overwhelmed or uncomfortable when establishing and keeping a boundary.
This discomfort comes from many years of conditioning, with a root in trauma or fear. For example, mine came from many years of not speaking truth from spirit because no one listened. I would say the meanest things to myself in my head. I thought I deserved everything that was happening. Breaking this down further took me inside to my core wound of neglect. My neglect is from childhood, but through the mirror technique (more on that here), I found that I was neglecting myself just as much as I wanted to blame the world. Once the root was uncovered, I said, “No more!” Upon asking how to move forward, Spirit gave me a period to integrate boundaries in the emotional, physical, spiritual, and mental bodies. If you wish to go deeper into understanding these bodies (pillars of existence) and their boundaries, check this out.
Before I start, I wish to indicate that you may already be setting boundaries. For some, this might be a flight response, a way of keeping others at arm’s length, or a way of establishing a sense of illusory control. While they might’ve served you at one point in the journey, we are looking at ways we can benefit everyone involved by setting the loving boundary as a response to life instead of a reaction we might end up taking back resentfully later.
Loving Boundaries: From Most to Least Commonly Known
Loving boundaries are simply the ways that your authentic self would love to operate in. These boundaries keep your high vibrational, balanced, and intuitive nature grounded and able to function smoothly in its highest capacity.
Steps to set these boundaries?
- Identify the pinpoint. Sometimes, it will be a needle in a haystack so give it time. What are you being asked to do? Is it something you can heal, or is it out of your control? Do you require growth away from (blank) to be able to grow?
- See the situation from every pair of shoes involved. Have compassion for you and those around you and their respective journeys.
- Choose love. Sometimes it seems tough, but in the end, it’ll help you both grow. Try to understand what they are showing you as a mirror. It’ll reveal your path forward.
- Follow your intuition. You might receive signs and telepathic messages from your spirit team about what to do.
- Set the boundary and enforce it. Spirit will be there to help guide you through the storm and if you need to make changes or adjustments later on.
Mental: the logical mind. Realm of potential wounded masculine energy.
Examples
- Standing up for yourself in and out of your mind (catching the reactions)
- Keeping a positive-outlook, optimistic, and full-of-faith mindset
- Aligning in surrender with your heart, intuition and higher self — spirituality
- Keeping away from distractions of any form and upholding conscious strength and encouragement until it is autonomous
Emotional: Mostly your heart, sacral, and root chakra make up this complex system. Also, a realm of potential wounded feminine energy.
Examples
- Using awareness and healing emotional triggers and wounds to help you feel more grounded and less anxious, stressed, victimized, etcetera
- Listening to intuitive No(s) and habits that hurt you in any sense (spiritual, emotional, mental, or physical)
- Checking in daily (body scans, inner child chats, asking yourself questions, etcetera.)
- Healing karmic loop cycles
- Learning to uphold responding instead of reacting to the world
Physical: the body of movement on this plane of existence.
Examples
- Doing the exercise you intuitively feel to do instead of desires, wants, or gains
- Asking someone to refrain from moving your belongings to make the space look ‘cleaner’ and ask or speak to you about it first
- Completing the aligned tasks your higher self asked you to get done that day, regardless of perceived fatigue
- Breaking up with or setting distance with someone due to misalignment, lower vibrational ways, and no way to grow in the situation
- Eating intuitively and cutting out what doesn’t serve you (i.e., junk food, sugars, etcetera.)
Spiritual: Everything you have to do with spirituality. This is your light body, consciousness, and essence; need I say more?
Examples:
- Grounding persistence and patience on a daily basis
- Founding inner and outer consistency with the integration of growth and lessons
- Keeping a spiritual practice
- Living in a constant state of aligned detachment
- Letting go (intuitively) of what doesn’t serve you anymore
- Having faith, regardless of the outcome of intuitive paths
- Minding your space and time with people, places, and things that don’t serve you
- Setting and living a mindful practice (or life) for your days
Above are many examples for reference. If you haven’t already read it, I recommend Inner World; Inner Self; Inner Child for a deeper layer of how this practice contributes tremendously to our paths and spiritual journeys.
I’ll leave you with some wisdom that helped me on my path:
- Never set a boundary if you are not grounded first. If it intuitively feels right after sitting with it or being shown signs, go for it.
- Ease is going to come in divine timing. Boundary setting is a part of deconditioning and reprogramming the conscious bodies (subconscious, unconscious, and conscious). You have all of the tools to help co-create with Spirit on this ride.
- You’re becoming a new way of being. You’ve never consistently lived unconditionally loved and free before in this lifetime. It can feel intense or scary, but also blissful and peaceful. These waves allow you to expand to greater ranges of frequencies and vibrations and to learn how to transmute energies more smoothly.
- Consistency and faith are key, especially on the days you feel like you can’t do this anymore. Trust it, you got this!
- What you’re stepping into is love. This is the unconditional love of self. This is what I call the selfish era, but it’s really not you being selfish. You’re stepping into something beautiful and healing in ways others may or may not understand.
So much love and light to you all. Enjoy the journey!! Happy healing.
