How to stay positive and know what that actually feels like

2 Ways to make sure it Happens

“Optimism is the most important human trait, because it allows us to evolve our ideas, to improve our situation, and to hope for a better tomorrow.”– Seth Godin

Look in the mirror. Go ahead, I’ll wait …

Okay, what did you see? Were you looking positive or negative?

If you were to present that face to someone you didn’t know very well, a stranger straight out of Walmart, what would they think?

Man, that guy looks depressing. Or, would they smile at you, because that is the attitude or vibe you are conveying to them.

Can you tell the difference?

Can any of us?

I asked Google to give me some quotes on being positive. I was shown 546,000,000 results.

Are there really that many people thinking about being positive? Or worried that they aren’t and are looking for some way to change that?

Is this now something we need to put attention on every day, like clearing our messages off the phone. Or throwing out the trash. Something that doesn’t take care of itself anymore, so we have to practice being positive, so hopefully it’ll stick.

I went for a drive today, to Pet Smart to be exact, because I needed to get another tube of Hairball treatment for my cat. It’s a thing.

I saw trees that were flowering. I saw people moving about — a few — some even mowing their lawns. I saw birds flying low, checking us out. I saw lots of other people driving, this way and that. All very focused. All a little stiff and preoccupied.

How many of them were feeling positive? How many of them could pass the mirror test that you just took? 20%, 50%, maybe more. How many could have passed that test six months ago?

In America we have the Pandemic. I say, In America, because there are so many other major places that are already on the other side of it or almost there, while we are managing to accelerate the process, like this was some kind of fucking contest and we just couldn’t come in second.

Anyway, I digress. We have the Pandemic, which is sort of like having a snapping turtle attached to a private part — that I won’t mention — 24/7, so that it is hard to concentrate on anything else.

Then we have Washington. That’s the place where … well, where many things go to die in committee. So, if anyone out there has something that they need to get rid of, while making it appear like they’re actively working on it, send it on over.

Back to my point. We have the Pandemic and Washington and leaders who are struggling mightily with that concept, and all of this is happening at the same time. Like having a Rottweiler grab you by the shorts, while being struck by lightning and having a massive reaction to a peanut you accidentally bit into.

It’s hard to remain positive, when there is such a counter-effort for the opposite emotion to take hold.

So, what does it mean when we read article after article about being positive? When we are frozen in place by anxiety, and feel that some part of our life is about to break away from us; like an iceberg, calving off a glacier, and beginning to float away, never to be seen again.

Most people are positive — to some degree. Some more so than others. Some people are like small suns that come into our lives and draw us into their orbit. Others have to work at it. Put the smile in place each morning and hope that it lasts through the commute.

They think about stuff and correlate it to positive and negative attitudes and assess the chances of getting through the day without breaking down into tears.

And it’s tough. Because Life does not happen in a vacuum. Life is messy.

We look for articles that give us clues. We listen to music that elevate our spirits and put us on a higher plane, and pray that we’ll stay there for a while.

We talk to friends and family and occasionally, pay a therapist to listen and assess. Like the mirror test, only more professional and with fewer tears.

Being positive doesn’t mean smiling all the time. That would be something else. Something false. Probably having a clinical name attached to it, requiring medication.

Positive means taking the next step. Setting aside the hurt that’s coming through the world, right at you, and doing what you intended anyway.

Positive means living without regret for three days or seven and thinking, you might just keep doing it.

Positive exists so we know what negative looks like. So, we know when to avoid the sounds that it makes when it wending its way towards us. To influence us and make us shy away from life.

There are only two things that anyone can really do to remain positive. Well, there may be more, but the jury is out that they’ll make any difference at all.

1.) Be positive. Which in modern language translates into, don’t give up. Keep dreaming. Keep smiling. Keeping hugging your kids and your spouse. Keep opening the door, stepping outside and breathing deeply. Keep looking to tomorrow, not as an escape but as an invitation to something better. Keep living the life you have, tweaking it, until it becomes the life you want.

2.) Be alert. Don’t dither. Don’t mistaken doubt for a friend. It’s not. Don’t listen to bad news. Don’t engage in bad thinking. Don’t hope, when Do is right there ready to start. Don’t equivocate, mistakes are simply the steps you take before arriving at your destination. Don’t fear tears, they are your friend. Don’t beat yourself up; there’s plenty of others standing in line — don’t be one of them. Don’t push away help, embrace it. Don’t fear change. Don’t stop laughing.

Simple right?

Probably not, but then, nothing is, that’s worth having.

Positive is like happiness, it’s not the destination but the journey.

Positive is like hitting a major league curveball with the wrong end of the bat — but doing it anyway. It’s challenging. It takes work and effort — every day.

It doesn’t happen one day and remain forever, without any further action. That’s wishful thinking — its distant cousin.

Being positive is a choice, we make every day. We may not like to look at it that way (I know I balk at it, often) but it’s the truth.

The alternative is something we’re not talking about now. For our purposes and this article, we’ll say that the opposite of positive is nothing. Simply waiting for whatever is heading our way to bash into us and change us into whatever it wants. Not a pretty sight.

Staying positive takes work and persistence.

Best of Luck.

Sherry, Paul, P.G. Barnett, George J. Ziogas, Caroline de Braganza, Dr Mehmet Yildiz, Karen Madej💛, Terri DelCampo-Nelson, Harley King, James Knight, Tom Byers

Joe Luca is writer and editor for ILLUMINATION and a published author and writer of children’s stories, short fiction, non-fiction articles, screenplays and poetry. Publications include Child’s Life, Children’s Playmate and others. There are some other articles below — have a read. And thank you for stopping by.