How to Reframe Your To-Do List as a Series of Opportunities
My schedule has felt like a special prison this past year.
But like a prison in Norway. Where there are no conventional security devices and its prime focus is rehabilitation. But it’s still prison. Where you’re on borrowed time and you can’t leave.
I thought by only leaving the house once a week to go grocery shopping, I’d have started an Etsy shop of hand-painted organic dog bowls with all my free time by now. Or my self-care routine would be so on fleek I’d be as grounded and at peace as a Buddhist Monk.
When instead I’m sitting here wondering why it feels stressful to maintain washing my hair regularly.
And yes, I know we have the same amount of hours in a day as Beyonce or Meghan Markle. Or anyone else that has enough money to afford a private chef and someone to release statements on their behalf.
I have tried to re-structure my schedule to offer some sort of self-soothing effect as I move through my day. Where I smell the flowers and hear the birds chirp as I move through my to-do list with ease.
Every new structure I entertain will work for a few days if I’m lucky. And then life gets in the way. Mountains of unexpected and urgent to-dos make their way onto my list. I become frazzled in the newfound chaos and continue my search for a better answer.
One daily “to-do” I maintain, even if the house is on fire or our power went out from a hailstorm, is my morning routine. Part of which is doing a daily meditation or journaling activity on The Shine App.
Recently there was a meditation written by the therapist Tiana Brawley. She offered a way to reframe your schedule from a “to-do list” to a “get-to-do list”.
Instead of feeling trapped in a list of all the things we HAVE to do, we can view everything as something we GET to do.
I will admit, a subtle eye roll may have escaped out of me.
I heard the sentiment and got her drift, but I didn’t fully buy-in. However, I still had no alternative solution to break free from my schedule prison.
I did some exploring and gave it a whirl. Could I actually see the opportunity that lies within every item on my to-do list? Instead of stress boiling up in me as I simply scan it over.
After some time of putting action into this theory, I admit, Ms. Tiana Brawley had a point to her very helpful offerings.
I not only broke free from my Norwegian prison of a schedule but embraced all that I “get-to-do” during my days.
1.) Technically, it’s all a choice. We’re choosing to do these things.
Sometimes it’s easy to forget that we’re adults with autonomy, and every single thing we do in our day is a choice.
You’re choosing to show up for work at 8 am when it’s expected of you. You could show up at 9 am. Hell, you could not show up at all. Obviously, that would be pretty irresponsible. And I’m sure it wouldn’t bode well for you keeping your job, but you have that choice.
Remind yourself that you’re a free human being. You can do whatever the hell you damn well, please. This should bring you some form of comfort. That by making certain choices, you’re CHOOSING to take care of yourself.
It’s a choice you don’t have to make, but a choice that you should. Because the benefit heavily outweighs the alternative.
No one is threatening you to meal prep. You will not have to endure waterboarding to do your taxes. These are choices you get to make with your own free will.
2.) I “Get-To-Do” Versus I “Have-To-Do”
Viewing everything as something we GET to do vs. something we have to do moves us into feeling empowered. Rather than feeling controlled by our schedule. Our time becomes our own again.
You GET to commit your evenings to writing. You don’t have to do it. You want to, so you get to. You get to continue getting better at your craft. You get to uphold a promise to yourself to write more consistently. You don’t have to grow your craft. You don’t have to uphold that promise to yourself.
You get to workout for an hour. You don’t have to. Sure, you want to maintain a certain level of health and working out is good for your body and your mind. But you don’t have to roll out your yoga mat or put your running shoes on. You get to.
The second you shift your mindset and realize that you GET to do these things, you take your own power back. Your life, and your time, is back in your control.
3.) Which of your needs are being met with every item on your list?
When I look at my “get-to-do” list, I look at what area of my life I’m taking care of with each item. Which one of my needs am I meeting? How am I taking care of myself with that item?
For instance, my part-time job is relatively flexible, albeit rather boring. It helps me take care of myself financially and offers me more security. This added security gives me more time to focus on my need for my purpose and passion, which is coaching business. It also allows me to commit more time to writing, my other passion.
I used to dread my part-time job, or look at it as a burden that was taking time away from contributing to my passions. Now, I have a rejuvenated excitement every time I clock in. I see the opportunity that it’s giving me.
When I work out, I’m taking care of my need for physical activity. When I set aside time to read, I’m taking care of my intellectual need.
You need to make sure that your schedule is taking care of YOU.
The items your schedule consists of are purposefully there to provide you with certain opportunities to take care of yourself, and your life.
What is the opportunity you’re affording yourself by making sure your various needs are met? What is the consequence of you not including items that meet your needs?
What opportunity is showing up for your part-time job giving you? What opportunity are you giving yourself by writing for an hour every morning? What opportunity are you affording yourself when you show up at the gym for an hour?
How are the items on your get-to-do list reflecting how you’re taking care of your needs?
4.) What will your future self thank you for?
My future self thanks me when I do my taxes on time. My future self thanks me when I meal prep at the beginning of a chaotic week. My future self thanks me when, on certain days, I stop working at 8 pm so I can read and relax. Or watch Married at First Sight with a glass of wine so I can feel more refreshed for tomorrow.
My future self thanks me for contributing to my IRA. My future self thanks me for writing a bit every day. Even though some days it’s not as much as I would like. My future self thanks me for showing up at the gym. My future self thanks me when I recognize that I need to take a day off.
Are there certain items that can wait until tomorrow, or next week? And taking time to chill is what future you ordered.
What items on your “get-to-do” list will your future self thank you for?
5.) How you’re spending your time is how you’re spending your life.
We all get a limited amount of time here on this planet. What we do with our time is what we’re doing with our life. We should have a great appreciation for what we’re choosing to do with our time.
How cool that we actually get a choice in how we’re spending our lives?! It can be daunting that we have so much autonomy and freedom. Or it’s a miracle that life truly is what we make of it.
Look at your time and how you’re spending it. You will one day look back at this time and it will inform the stories you share about your life.
You are currently designing your own narrative.
Take-Aways
Every item on your list is an opportunity.
An opportunity for you to meet your various needs.
An opportunity for you to learn and grow.
An opportunity for you to continue designing the story of your life.
Break free from your progressive, but restrictive, Norwegian prison of a schedule, and embrace all that you “get-to-do” in your day.
Maddie is a writer, voice-over artist and certified life coach. Self-declared boxed wine aficionado. She’d love to hear all your thoughts at [email protected]
